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	anne_noonlight 2006-07-06 09:59 am UTC (link)
	My grandmother loves "uncomplicated". I've never heard anyone outside my family use it, though. (Reply to this)

	singe 2006-07-06 10:51 am UTC (link)
	Feeb (as in feeble minded,) Wart-tongue, Tard and Waterhead were some of my father's favorite names. (For us. Thanks, dad.) (Reply to this)

	greypearl 2006-07-06 10:53 am UTC (link)
	This video uses the word "trainables" for the developmentally delayed. I've never heard it before in my life, but perhaps you could use the term? Note: The video is about sex education, and may not be safe for work. (Reply to this)

	notjo 2006-07-06 11:51 am UTC (link)
	I've often said "not the brightest crayon in the box". (Reply to this)

	phosfate 2006-07-06 12:07 pm UTC (link)
	"Needs the Velcro shoes." (Reply to this)

	big_bad_wolf 2006-07-06 12:10 pm UTC (link)
	Challenged, Really Quite Friendly and Extra Time. (Reply to this)

fernwithy
2006-07-06 12:48 pm UTC (link)

So affectionate, dim bulb. There's the whole "not the ___est ____ in the ____" family, of course. (Not the sharpest knife in the drawer, not the brightest bulb in the lamp, you can just make them up at some point, depending on the personality and tastes of the character using them--not the swiftest Swiffer in the broom closet, for instance.) Not exactly a Rhodes scholar. No one's idea of a genius. Simple.

In the less euphemistic category, in my high school, the common term was "botard," since the none-too-bright kids tended to get shipped to the BOCES center for vocational training.

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	esclaramonde 2006-07-06 12:57 pm UTC (link)
	I remember hearing people say "Bocie" when I was in junior high. (Reply to this)(Parent)

kirarose
2006-07-06 12:49 pm UTC (link)

Tardy, Checker-board (only in my area, I should imagine), Not the brightest bulb in the chandelier, not the sharpest tool in the shed, Dim, Half-quart Low, Quart Low, Pint low, Exceptional, Gift from God, special, Different, A little on the Slooooow side, mentally challenged, intellectual disability, feeble-minded, King/Queen of Moronia, deficient, Blissful (As in, Ignorance is Bliss), Sweethearts, Glass Half-Full, Glass Half-empty,

Also this might help:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=retarded

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	dramedy 2006-07-06 01:18 pm UTC (link)
	Arguing on the internet is like running in the special olympics. Even if you win, you are still retarded. Oh urban dictionary, I love thee. (Reply to this)(Parent)

moonjaguar
2006-07-06 06:45 pm UTC (link)

I've heard "angels" and "little angels" for people with severe retardation or other conditions that require specialized care. I don't know if it was used in other places or if it was local (from the Little Angels home in my hometown).

"Summit Schoolers" or "s/he goes to Summit School" was a localism for retarded children and teens (though Summit School was geared for disabled students of varying educational/functional levels and included an accelerated/gifted program).

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	nlb_muffin 2006-07-06 02:11 pm UTC (link)
	I always liked Pablo Franciso's description of teenagers in horror movies: "You can strangle them with a cordless phone." (Reply to this)

	miharu 2006-07-06 02:28 pm UTC (link)
	It's not verbose, but a friend of mine likes to say "sped." As in SPecial EDucation. Yup. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	smo 2006-07-06 04:36 pm UTC (link)
	I've also heard "reetee" as shorthand for "retarded." Speaking of which, the woman who used to write Tardblog went by the pseudonym Riti Sped. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	apoplexia 2006-07-06 03:43 pm UTC (link)
	Tries hard. (Reply to this)

	laerwen 2006-07-06 04:02 pm UTC (link)
	Window-licker. Also, Takes the Short Bus to school. (Reply to this)

	smo 2006-07-06 04:34 pm UTC (link)
	Cross-threaded between the ears, running on his/her rims, walking around dead and don't know enough to lie down, don't know nothing and has that all tangled up, the engine's running but there's no one behind the wheel, not playing with a full deck, elevator doesn't go all the way to the top. That's all I can think of at the moment. Perhaps I'm a bit Special myself. (Reply to this)

	the_wanlorn 2006-07-06 05:06 pm UTC (link)
	Only one I have that hasn't been said already is "SPED-head". (Reply to this)

moonjaguar
2006-07-06 06:22 pm UTC (link)

"Slow learner" and "slow of mind" were pretty common "polite" euphemisms. Trainably Mentally Handicapped was a special-ed tracking category used in the late '80s-early '90s at my oldest nephew's high school. "Educable" and "ineducable" were levels of retardation. "Reet" was a biggie in the late '70s-early '80s where I'm from, as was "mel" (mental minus the n, t and a).

There's also the old once-standard classifications of levels of mental retardation: moron, imbecile, and idiot. Cretin's another. Also "mongoloid" which sprung from the earlier "mongolian idiot".

"Mongoloid" made me really think how terminology that was once acceptable can evolve into a perjorative. I wasn't born when "colored" fell out of acceptable usage in the US but I remember "mongoloid" being acceptable usage for persons with Down's Syndrome.

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slackerbitch
2006-07-06 06:24 pm UTC (link)

Some of these are more leaning to "stupid" or "incompetent" than "retarded", but I hope that's OK.

A few sandwiches short of a picnic, the lights are on but nobody's home, can't spell CAT if you spot them the C and A, dumber than a box of hair [also: a box of rocks, a bag of hammers, etc.], can't find their ass with both hands, can't tell their ass from a hole in the ground, thick as a brick, not firing on all cylinders,

A little googling and I found a few new favorites: the wheel is turning but the hamster is dead, goes surfing in Nebraska, fell out of the family tree, he has a photographic memory but no film, and if brains were dynamite, he couldn't blow his nose.

(If you try typing in some of the longer and more idiomatic ones, you get better responses than just googling "euphemisms for retarded".)

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	fernwithy 2006-07-06 09:53 pm UTC (link)
	than a box of hair [also: a box of rocks, a bag of hammers, etc Oh, an oddball one that's common in my family is "dumb as grass." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	grand_sealink 2006-07-08 12:53 am UTC (link)
	A long while back, on the old old old Internet, there was this group of saucy women who made a blog called Technomancy. One of them used the phrase "Dumber than a box of rocks with all the smart rocks taken out". And it has been my favorite ever since. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	coyotegirl 2006-07-07 06:03 am UTC (link)
	Sharp as a marble. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	feloniousfeline 2006-07-06 06:33 pm UTC (link)
	"Rides the Short Gryffin" was a favorite at work. Of course, I worked with a couple of gamers. (Reply to this)

	littlebitca 2006-07-06 06:33 pm UTC (link)
	Zombie-proof. (Reply to this)

	big_bad_wolf 2006-07-06 08:23 pm UTC (link)
	One more: Joey. (Reply to this)

	rogue 2006-07-06 09:05 pm UTC (link)
	"Sign holders", which might only make sense to anime con attendees. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	phosfate 2006-07-07 05:07 pm UTC (link)
	Or sports fans. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	wankaholic 2006-07-06 09:48 pm UTC (link)
	"[He/she/it] is darling, but couldn't pour water out of a boot if instructions were written on the heel." (Reply to this)(Thread)

	khym_chanur 2006-07-07 01:43 am UTC (link)
	"Duller than a sack of wet liver". (Reply to this)(Parent)

	khym_chanur 2006-07-07 01:43 am UTC (link)
	Whenever I see a street sign saying SLOW CHILDREN AT PLAY I wonder "If the children move so slowly, why in the world are you letting them play outside, where they might not be able to get out of the way of a car in time". (Reply to this)(Thread)

	panthea 2006-07-07 11:24 am UTC (link)
	Heh, I saw a sign recently that said SLOW DEAF BLIND CHILDREN. It's like, they're slow, deaf, and blind? What are they getting for Christmas, cancer? (Reply to this)(Parent)

	kenboy 2006-07-07 03:50 pm UTC (link)
	Tiger Woods got yelled at a month or two ago for using "spaz," which apparently has connotations relating to retardation in the UK. (Reply to this)

	grand_sealink 2006-07-08 12:55 am UTC (link)
	Used probably more for crazies than slow kids is the "A few _____ shy/short of a _____" A few sandwiches shy of a picnic, a few bricks short of a load. But I thought I'd mention it. (Reply to this)