Joystiq wank that doesn't involve Vladimir Cole
...but does involve that other reliable flashpoint of splooge, Final Fantasy VII. As far as news goes, things had been fairly dead in the FFVII fandom until recently, when the Tokyo Game Show trailer for Crisis Core (the fourth entry in the spinoff-fest that is the Compilation of FFVII) finally found its way online.

Joystiq posts an entry featuring the trailer (which, by the by, is teh pretty, with lots of cutscenes [potential spoilers, of course] and a smidgin of gameplay footage toward the end). The post itself isn't wanky (again, it's not by Vlad), but one can never underestimate the Power of Fanboy Commenters (note: comments aren't very spoilerish for CC, if at all).

There are the usual jabs at the series and debates on the bishieness of the male characters (including someone laying the blame on our dear friend Gackt). There's also a fair amount of PSP/Sony bashing and defending. And along the way, Halo's Master Chief is brought into the discussion.

And if that weren't enough, Joystiq later posts the video again (this time as the day's "hottest game video") and the fanboys have dutifully taken up the wank reins once more. This second thread features comparisons between Nintendo and Sony Final Fantasies and the obligatory complaining about where the Final Fantasy series is going.

Kind of small (for Joystiq), but entertaining.