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the_mouse ([info]the_mouse) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2007-03-07 16:31:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:person: stephen colbert, religion

Stephen Colbert Wank
Taken from the nicest mousie on Wank Report. Sadly, this is not as hot as the title would suggest.

It all starts when [info]saltyj posts the following to [info]thequestionclub:

"'I love my Church, and I'm a Catholic who was raised by intellectuals, who were very devout. What is worthy of satire is the misuse of religion for destructive or political gains. That's totally different from the Word, the blood, the body, and the Christ. His kingdom is not of this earth.' - Stephen Colbert


Does anyone else think it's super cool that he follows his faith? I totally wanted to marry him after I read this, but...dang. He's already married with 3 kids. And is old enough to be my father. Dang."

The responses at first are mostly positive. Then [info]nightninja76 pipes up.

"No, it's not supercool. Faith is for morons."

And all hell breaks loose.



Some sample comments:

nightninja76: "Faith means believing something without (or in spite of) evidence. That people subscribe to something so ridiculous is intellectually offensive.

You wouldn't assign blind faith to your car salesman, would you? No, you'd want guarantees. If he couldn't deliver on his promises, you would stop giving him your business, right?

Why does Jesus get a free pass? Because he's dead? Bullshit."

Katyowns: "And what about people who've had personal experiences with their God?"
Saltyj: "We're all crazy ppl who sees crazy things and hearing voices in our heads. Yup."
Katyowns: "When did I say that? I have had personal experiences where I know my God was close by. I can't prove it, but I felt it, and I personally know it."
Saltyj: "No, I was agreeing with you. I was being sarcastic. Sorry for the confusion! I've had many personal experiences with God. Conversations, even."

______queenie: "Saying faith is stupid is like saying hope is a waste of time. People like to think that after they've gone through life, they'll be able to go to heaven and be at peace. Having faith can be good for you, being able to pray to a deity can relieve stress, even if you have no proof that someone is listening, it doesn't matter."
witchbabywig: "...hope IS a waste of time."
h3artshap3d_b0x: "So if someone is very ill, it's a waste of time to have hope that they get better? What would you suggest doing?"
witchbabywig: "Yes, it is. It changes nothing. I suggest neutrality and preparation for either outcome."
h3artshap3d_b0x: "Wow. So between the two of you, it really looks like Atheists are pretty stone hearted people."
shippo: "Nah, they're usually pretty cool. Except nightninja76. He seems to be a bit of a nutter."
pester: "Not the most colourful crayon in the box, that one."

snarkivist: "THE ABSENCE OF EVIDENCE DOES NOT INDICATE THE EVIDENCE OF ABSENCE."
nightninja76: "Thanks, Donald Rumsfeld."

h3artshap3d_b0x: "You're young. I used to think the same way. I'm not religious, I wont ever be, but I am agnostic."
bellasmommy: Shh, he's in MENSA. Therefore he > everyone else."
h3artshap3d_b0x: "oic."
nightninja76: "I never claimed that. Why not reason with me instead of speculating falacious straw men to other people?"

In reply to a comment, now sadly deleted:
h3artshap3d_b0x: "People who know would tell you I have thought about God and spirituality to DEATH."

nightninja76: "An agnostic is an athiest [sic] who hasn't thought about it yet."
sesmo: "Nope. An atheist is just a religious person who switched his religion to believing in No God without evidence, instead of believing in one or more god(s) without evidence. An agnostic is someone that realizes that we cannot know. There is no proof showing the existence of god(s), nor is there proof showing the lack of existence of god(s). Therefore, either belief is one held despite lack of evidence."
therikkster: "Sorry, but an Athiest [sic] doesn't have to switch religion; Athiests [sic] who believe in no god, at all, nada. I'm an Athiest [sic, again] but I was never religious."
deviatednorm: "Hey, cute strawman. I totally liked how you added the personal anecdote while missing the crux of sesmo's post."

keithbuff: "Atheism is not a religion. It's like saying 'not collecting coins' is a hobby."



All that and more can be found here: http://community.livejournal.com/thequestionclub/18552182.html

P. S. If this would be more appropriate over at otf_wank, let me know and I'll move it.

ETA: The wank, she has hit Stupid Free (thanks, [info]wankaholic). And [info]oar was kind enough to provide us with extra goodies from the main wank here.



(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]oar
2007-03-08 02:08 am UTC (link)
I was just about to report this! But you missed the best part. The real star of the hour is [info]alluringkailyn, who drops in to tell us that sarcasm is a sin, and that while s/he has never watched the Report, s/he has read about it on teh intarwebs, which is just as good. Furthermore, everyone else is just being closeminded, being a good Catholic means being totally free of sin (HAI I JUST SPOTTED A PROBLEM IN UR CATECHISM THAR), and all objectionable television programming is located on Comedy Central, which, of course, s/he does not watch.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]amyheartssiroc
2007-03-08 02:15 am UTC (link)
Seriously. No wonder people think Christians have no sense of humor. D=

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]doomsday
2007-03-08 02:33 am UTC (link)
Uh oh, I have to go tell my super Catholic grandma that she needs to stop being amused by satire and mockery!

I wonder if alluringkailyn is against Conan O'Brien too?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]elektra3
2007-03-08 02:48 am UTC (link)
Uh oh, I have to go tell my super Catholic grandma that she needs to stop being amused by satire and mockery!

Oh, absolutely. And I should let my devoutly religious friend know that writing her midterm paper on political satire is an offense against God. Friends don't let friends go to hell, after all.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]puipui
2007-03-08 02:52 am UTC (link)
I didn't see Jesus mocking the sinners and non-believers either.

So that bit about taking the stick out of your own eye before pointing out the splinter in someone else's was just, what, a friendly pre-Visine eye care tip, then?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]aristaea
2007-03-08 02:58 am UTC (link)
I'm torn beween OMG LOLOLOLOL and DO NOT WANT.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sunhawk
2007-03-08 03:05 am UTC (link)
Sweet God that's some crazy D:

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]snarkivist
2007-03-08 03:12 am UTC (link)
I really wish I weren't responsible for this whole wank. I start out trying to figure out why she thinks this about a show she's never seen, and first I get Scriptures thrown at me, then I get called a bad Catholic, then I get called a Protestant, then I get called a dumb shit. I'm waiting for her to call me a whore next. Or make a few phone calls and have me excommunicated.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]nlb_muffin
2007-03-08 03:13 am UTC (link)
I suggest looking up the word in the dictionary since it's obvious that your brain is non-functioning (and since you are just a screen name to me and not a person, I don't have any religious reason not to say so).

What what what what what what what?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]snarkivist
2007-03-08 04:50 am UTC (link)
I'm not a real person, which is why she can insult me.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]luthe
2007-03-08 07:33 am UTC (link)
You'd better go join the bisexuals on the astral plane.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]snarkivist, 2007-03-08 07:37 am UTC

[info]panthea
2007-03-08 04:00 am UTC (link)
all objectionable television programming is located on Comedy Central

Lies and falsehoods! I am gravely offended by Sci Fi's "original" movies. In fact, that's my catechism-- "They canceled Farscape and The Invisible Man for this crap? Also, wrestling?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]kosaginolegion
2007-03-08 05:04 am UTC (link)
Word. So much Word.

*misses both shows*

*cries*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]fionnabhair
2007-03-08 05:40 am UTC (link)
Sci-Fi...

Starbuck...

You BASTARDS!

Sorry about that - bit of residual trauma from Maelstrom. I'm sure it'll clear up any day now.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]snarkivist
2007-03-08 09:57 am UTC (link)
I knooooooooooooooooooow!!!


Sigh.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]fionnabhair, 2007-03-08 09:31 pm UTC

[info]bigbigtruck
2007-03-08 06:12 pm UTC (link)
I dunno, "Mammoth" was pretty much a great drinking game starter the pinnacle of cinematic achievement. It had Tom Skerritt and everything!


(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]kinneas
2007-03-08 05:28 am UTC (link)
HA! Just as I was reading this comment my phone's ringtone of Ave Maria went off.

...I set it because it's the Hitman: Blood Money intro :)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]barankhy
2007-03-08 05:43 am UTC (link)
Blood Money is Love. Agent 47 is strangely sexy.
*feels the sudden urge to finally get it back from a friend -_-*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]kinneas
2007-03-08 05:45 am UTC (link)
Agent 47 is the sexiest motherfucker ever. Seriously.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-03-08 05:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kinneas, 2007-03-08 05:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-03-08 06:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kinneas, 2007-03-08 06:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-03-08 06:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kinneas, 2007-03-08 08:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-03-08 03:55 pm UTC

[info]vigilanterodent
2007-03-08 05:46 am UTC (link)
I confess fear that someone will go all "CHRISTIANS CANNOT BE SNARKY" is the only reason I haven't long since given in and made a [info]st_sassypants comm for Christian snark.

I mean, I think that position is woefully silly, given that there's plenty of sarcasm-as-a-teaching-tool in the Bible, but I hate the thought of arguing it again and again.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]onaga
2007-03-08 05:52 am UTC (link)
Pros: DO IT
Cons: DOOOO EEEET

If only because "st_sassypants" just made me laugh really hard.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]vigilanterodent, 2007-03-08 06:20 am UTC

[info]snarkivist
2007-03-08 05:57 am UTC (link)
I'd join.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]thecomfychair
2007-03-08 07:15 am UTC (link)
oh dude, do it. I mean who could turn down [info]st_sassypants

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]vigilanterodent, 2007-03-08 07:31 pm UTC
possibly my favorite wank quote ever.
[info]goblin
2007-03-08 04:46 pm UTC (link)
"If you love derision, you are altogether as Satan; and if you mock at your fellow, you are the mouth of the Devil;"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: possibly my favorite wank quote ever.
[info]plazmah
2007-03-08 05:35 pm UTC (link)
Icon love!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


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