Return of the Unicorn Jelly wank.
Remember how the UJ forums spotted the wank over here?

UPDATE: The whole thread got baleeted, and this was posted. Apparently my civility jokes hit a bit too hard.



Since last we wanked, the thread has grown to 16 pages. How did this happen? Well, I'll give you a [long] recap.

First, fandom_wank was, well, UJ_wanked.
ObakeTenshi
Post subject: UJ has been Fandom Wanked! XD
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http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/99881.html

I never thought I'd see the day.... its an anti-UJ flamefest! XD

At first I was pissed off, but this is really funny for some reason!

The initial reaction can be summed up in this post:
Cardboard Box
Post subject:
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The entire comment and replies in a nutshell:

"I don't like this comic!!! It's not like the the stuff I'm used to, SO IT SUCKS!!!1!!, therefore its writer SUCKS!!! and everything about the writer SUCKS!!!!!! and everything related to the writer AND her comic SUXX0RZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Wow! You really are so STRONG and EMPHATIC! You MUST be right! Therefore I agree with you!"

Frankly, I've never read anything so cruel, pathetic and infantile in my life.

JDR, of course, gives us her opinion in 20,000 words or less, but I'll spare you your sould and just snip an exemplary paragraph:
I have had some incredibly active, incredibly obsessed detractors, people who have nearly made careers out of decrying everything about me, my work, my opinions, my self. That, really, is one hell of a compliment.

Prostate cancer and masturbation are mentioned. I don't know why.

Then Banal is mentioned.
ReleeTheSquirrel
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Funky, they refer to me like I'm the AVATAR of ALL FURRYNESS!

That's kinda cool in a way.

But I'm still irritated, because the name of the guy who posted that is Banal, and that's my absolute most hated word that I know.

It's such a stupid word. Grr.

And then I get drawn in.
Drooling Fan Girl
Post subject:
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After a good deal of reading, I can establish that banal is married to someone by the name of waffleofdeath.

I find the whole thing weird and rather like watching a train wreck.

Take Care
DFG [Note: DFG edited her post later to correct her stupidity, so I had to edit it back to retain the original stupidity.]

0kay. Banal and I have a long history with JDR. And when I saw this, I realized that I'd quit PoE. And so the PD no longer applied. And they were talking about me. And I was so tired of the UJ forums' BS. So I did the bad thing and I posted. Banal soon followed. I admit this was bad. However, I am a mean, horrible, insidious person, so what can I do? I wanked. I'll fess up.

But then they wanked back. Gods did they wank back. When I posted, this thing was 2 pages long. After I left for the night, it was three. I came back a few days later and somehow it had grown to eight, thanks to Banal's careful grooming.

Eight pages.

The fuck.

So, I saw bullshit here and there and decided to make more corrections. In the ten posts total I made in that thread, they were all corrections on our viewpoints, general attempts to curb idiocy, and sarcastic semantics. I don't think that's too bad. Banal and I had no real goal - it's just that after months of stupid, things get pent up. We just wanted to post. We weren't trying to start a flame war or turn JDR's denizens against her. We were just doing things for the shit of it. Actually, Banal did have one goal in mind: to encourage three more pages of wankery within the week.

That was Monday.

The thread is now sixteen pages long.

Sixteen. Pages. Long.

I'll post the funnier bits. The whole thread is full of gems. [Including someone remembering my fanart, DFG retracting the wife statement and later saying that she said it because she was trying to get inside Banal's head or something, and Banal's sister coming in like the cavalry. The sarcastic cavalry.]

BastDawn
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I don't understand this at all. I read lots of webcomics, and I often find some that don't appeal to me. So what? I'm not going to waste my time complaining about them (or the authors!) when there are far more entertaining things to do.

Maybe I should read more stuff by this group who enjoy complaining so much. After all, if they hate UJ so much, maybe they also bitch about other cool things I'd like to see. Darwin in action? 0nly time will tell.

I am pasting this entire post in because to eliminate just one word would be criminal:
SnowHart
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Guess who's back?

Well, I'm rather thrilled to see Jennifer is such a "celeb". I mean, I never woulda' known. I'm happy to see such an underground girl getting what she deserves (Fair and square and whatnot. Jennifer is a kickass lady with some great ideas and some brains and great stuff, she deserves to be recognised, and anybody who's recognised for good reasons is going to get slammed by some fuckwad. Fact of life) even if it is by some moron who doesn't deserve the honour of knowing her name. Far be it for me to draw such conclusions, I'm no goddess (even if my Naeta tries to tell me otherwise).

If I can achieve half of this, I'll be proud beyond words.

If I can achieve all of it, I'll be halfway to my life's ambition.

Way to go, Jennifer. Piss off them morons. Become successful, dammit. Be everything that they don't want you to be. Show them what they're afraid of.

I'm backin' you up here, your own personal gothic cheerleading squad. Hells, once I get a little more of my own work done, I intend to come to you (and the rest of Accursed Toys, that "you" is plural) and ask for advice and a little help to get me on my way.

You gave my dream a direction. I've got pushes from all around. Hell if I want to see you falter.

Push! Push!

Like you need my encouragement, but I wanna' say it anyway!

I didn't even get past page two reading this. I didn't want to bother. I'm operating on less sleep than I've gotten during "hellweek" (Production week, I'm a runner!) and I'm on a roll worthy of Jimmy Swaggart on crack after he discovers that Pagan gods are real!

We shall overcome, but not the way you think!

We shall kick ass and take names, because they ridicule us now. Someday, they'll realise why. They ridicule us because we are to be taken seriously. They ridiculed the steam engine, you know. They ridiculed film, you know. They ridiculed colour prints and computers and aeroplanes and sewing machines and....

They ridiculed everything we hold dear now.

They ridicule us because we are to be taken seriously.

And that's why we'll do what we're going to do.

I'm so tired, I should be sleeping right now.

But y'know what?

I don't care.

I'm thrilled beyond words that someone out there gives enough of a damn to flame this board, this comic so much that they're willing to be single-mindedly hateful and spiteful about it. Admit it. At least we all have different flavours of "love" and "like" of it. I really like Unicorn Jelly, think it's really cool, think some parts coulda' used some work, and think the end was a little dissatisfying though it was overall good.

And some of the characters will never leave me alone at night. Not like I mind. Rrrowr.

The forums kick ass. The people here rock. I've met one of the greatest people in the world through it. Hell, I love him so much I'm going to get married to him. How kickass is that?

I keep getting sucked back in here. Proof positive. I haven't been here in how long? I've done some changing, some modifying, and some slow alteration.

And now....

Now I'm done bitching and rambling.

If this made any sense, I'm shocked. I'll look back on it tomorrow (when I'm awake) and gag at my own lack of sense. But y'know what? I don't care.

I love you guys. All of you, even if I can't stand you. (I'm naming no names. You guys do exist. Some of you guys, if I were in the same room as you for five minutes, I'd have to struggle to not throttle you. But y'know what? That's fine. Because I like you anyway. Even if you are a pain in the ass. It's all cool. I've had friends like that for years. In the right setting, at the right time {usually an arcade, usually late at night} people like you can seriously kick ass.)

And that's why I stick around here.

And that's why I still poke my head around here.

You guys kick ass. I'm goin' to go write and look up how to use oil paints now. THEY RIDICULED THE STEAM ENGINE, AND NOW THEY'LL BE SORRY!!!

CarthageBlackPanther
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I have one last thing to add to this discussion.

Irk, Banal, you may not want to admit it but you are trying to start a flame war here.
It's not going to work.

Not because we're "too smart" or "too classy" but because we just don't like flame wars.

As for everyone else: we've acknowledged that Jennifer has faults, and that she is not a perfect human being. We've done what Irk, and Banal, and their posse wanted. We've admitted that our Creatrix is not a god. She is human.

Let's end this with our dignity intact. This is from the same guy who posted fanart of his furry avatar masturbating. He wants his dignity intact after that?

0n the topic of 'waffleofdeath' [me] being Banal's wife:
Drooling Fan Girl
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Again I appoligize for that mistake, irk.

I think I was trying to figure out why she created that post. And I thought it was perhaps out of personal spite.

But now I realize she was simply providing the journalfen fanwanker community a target to make fun of, thus enhancing her own status in that community.

And yes, I do appreciate that you are being civil.

Take Care
DFG You earn status points for wanking? What is this, "Fandom: the Wankerade"? Also, I love how they compliment my civility. I knew that if I claimed I was using it, they'd believe me.

Monthenor
Post subject:
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......squee4242 wrote:
......I like how it's claimed that they only check this forum every 'few weeks'
......but the replies come a hell of a lot quicker than that.

I think that means they've been checking every few weeks during the run of UJ. During their latest foray they discovered the existence of Jenniverse, were sickened by it, and banal collected their extensive anti-UJ knowledge into a massive Fandom Wank. Since then, they've stuck around to watch the drama they caused in this thread.

I understand they'll probably leave as soon as this thread quiets down, but I wish they'd stick around and give us a real opposing point of view. I've looked back at the previous 'dissenters' I remembered (yangn, kittical, and Dr. Taxil Necrobane), and this is the most civil and reasoned discussion yet. A real opposing point of view? What were all our posts before that, some sort of bootleg dissention? Also, we are being CIVIL. See?

kbhoyt
Post subject:
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No matter what we say or do, they are not going to be happy. To the people who dislike us: I don't worship JDR.. I think she can be self-pitying (a very big pet peeve of mine actually) and has a slight case of know-it-all-ism (Takes one to know one hehe) but she is cool, she has talent, she updates with little stuff (This is actually what I like best about her, all the little quotes/sites/games and stuff she pops up with) but most of all, she is interesting. I know you might have something to say. Point out any error I made, and false analogies I have thought of. All I care about is that I like her, I am not inane, I am not drooling (though I have posted drooling a few times), I am not a follower no matter what, and I am not more or less depending on what you have to say. Your insults on all of us are unfounded, opinionated, and false, in my opinion. They are yours, and in your mind they might be the most "True" thing in the world, but that doesn't change me or anyone else here. If you have nothing better to say then to make fun of us, then please leave. We are aware of our own faults, and we don't care, we like eachother's company, and we don't care if you do or not. A lot of JDR debunking occured after we posted. Hmmmm. Also, they are right! They are definitely right! All that we know to be true is now false. Earth is cube shape, four sides four cube way! You are educated retarded!

While explaining that she doesn't hate them all, Banal's sister makes a crack about burning effigies of the UJ fans. Alfador asks if she'll take a picture of his effigy. The reply:
bitchgoddess compensation
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ok, alfador. but i'll need to know a little more about you so it can be accurate:

1. have you ever washed your trio of fox tails? i've heard they've gotten progressively rattier, so i'm assuming the answer is no. but i want to be certain before i get started.
2. do you regularly wear a diaper, or was that a one-time thing?
3. have you got a dent in your skull that makes you incapable of understanding simple phrases? Pure brilliance.

Then....well, this:
Inu
Post subject: Notorious J.D.R.
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YEAH! You hear that, PoE? Kuro5hin? Fandom_Wank?

All your hate just gives us more attention.

So watch out, Keenspot. Watch out, MegaShlockPennyLoserTokyos of the world. Take cover, snarky gamer strips. Your days are numbered.

Long live indie webcomics. Now I dead from hilarity.

And this:
candide
Post subject:
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ObakeTenshi wrote:
And what exactly *is* your point, because it doesn't make any sense to me.
They're "point" is simply ego masturabtion. Take it from someone who's been around for a while: I've seen their ilk before. They're so jealous of the attention that someone creative is getting that they attack that person. First, they try to paint their target as some sort of egomaniac so that they can "play the hero" and be justified in their vitriol. Then comes the attacks, and attempts to start a flame war. They live off of the attention, getting downright nasty when that attention wanes. After a while, it becomes clear that everything they have said, every attack they have made on their target, is really just projection of the things they do not like about themselves onto the aforementioned target.

It's all a rather sad instance of ego masturbation, Yas. No point in wasting any energy on it. Besides, if we're gonna watch someone masturbate, we may as well watch Alfador. At least it'll be Fluffy Fun Goodness.

...help.



There's more. So much more. But I am only one Irk, and I haven't even read the last four pages of this thing.