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Well, I got an account today, and figured I'd use it. You, who are reading this pamphlet, have come to attend. Why the dire warning? The reasons for this warning are Not the events of the future, you understand. The other ones. It goes on, detailing the heartless, dictatorial manner in which the ruling New Fandom bastards didn't pay strict attention to Robert's Rules of Order when running events. They refused to recognize a motion. . . sorry, they REFUSED TO RECOGNIZE THE MOTION, by A MAJORITY OF MEMBERS, if you could believe such things. And after these startling facts and warnings, Kyle ended by saying that the SCIENCE FICTION CONVENTION IS You suck, you bastards. Unless you don't! Well, armed with these pamphlets Kyle descended on the convention. His version of what happened is here; The New Fandom version is sadly available only in book form – Sam Moskowitz's The Immortal Storm has a fair amount about the Futurians, as told by the leader of the New Fandom. Anyhow, to summarize Kyle's story. He went down, stashed most of his pamphlets behind a radiator for later distribution, but gave one of them to a hot chick, because he thought that would totally impress her. Meanwhile, the animosity between the New Fandom and the Futurians had been sufficiently heated that the convention organizers started arguing with a half-dozen Futurians. Apparently, there were some threats of physical violence at that point. Then the pamphlet which had been given to the hot chick got passed along to the convention chair. That didn't make him happy. They were having their argument in the room where Kyle had hid his pamphlets; the con-chair found those, which also didn't make him happy. He laid down an ultimatum: There was to be no propaganda from the Futurians, no speeches, no disruptions of any kind, and a pledge of "orderly" conduct -- these were Moskowitz's conditions for admittance. Since nobody else had promised to refrain from disrupting the convention or passing out propaganda, that wasn't okay with the six Futurians in question. So, they were banned from the convention. They held a sort of convention in exile in a cafeteria across the street, and told everyone about their own, cooler convention, which they would have later. It's worth noting that Kyle wasn't one of the banned Futurians – he had gotten into the convention earlier. Man, you might be saying. Those New Fandom people sure are utter bastards; why, they REFUSED TO RECOGNIZE THE MOTION, by A MAJORITY OF MEMBERS, if you'll recall. But the thing is, the Futurians were all Godless commie bastards. (you might want to do a search for "futurian" on that link; it's kind of a teal deer. A stone crazy teal deer.) Also they were moderates and Fascists? Suffice it to say, while their political views might be hard to pin down, they had political views. What had upset them about the convention was that it was just a bunch of guys getting together to have some fun, and hang out with SF pros. As Kyle quotes Forry Ackerman as saying: 'If the reason for the convention was for fans to meet the pros, to exchange autographs, to see movies, etc., then we would have to say that the convention was a success. If this first meeting of readers and authors should have produced some discussions, some resolutions, then we would have to say it was not.' A convention without producing resolutions? That's like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich without the elephant feces. Did I mention that this was all in the late 1930s? Oh, right. This was all in the late 1930s – the convention in question was the 1939 Worldcon, but the feud had been bubbling a few years before that. Like I said, the wank is a bit stale. But the Kyle essay I linked to was written in 1998, and he's still trying to correct "misinformation and misinterpretations", so it's probably not completely dead yet. EDIT: I cleaned up the last Kyle quotation a bit, to only get what Forry had said there, and made a few other minor copy-edits. Also, for all those that liked the wank, thanks. Or, in the case of those who thanked me for posting it, you're welcome. |
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