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Zero Punctuation vs Fanbois (as predicted)
For anyone who doesn't already know, Yahtzee is a charming charismatic bastard who creates gaming reviews for the online magazine The Escapist using clip art, simple cartoons and by speaking really, really fast in a delicious English accent. This week he decided to tackle Halo3 in his typical Not Work Safe Style. Which is to say he utterly skewers it.

This does not go down well with some of the fanbois.

In the comment section, which is three times longer than his typical response, reviewers alternate between glowing praise and cries of "you just don't get it" in varying levels of butt hurt.

Also in this wank, we have a creepy reviewer wanting to take Yahtzee home to meet his mom, five dollar words helpfully defined for the stupid, and the banhammer coming down on someone dumb enough to say "I like wank".

Some enjoyable random quotes:

On page 2, Omnibus01 livens things up with this difficult to follow gem:

Indeed...I enjoy a nifty flash presentation as well as the next guy, but have a bit of trouble trusting a fellow named after a mindless dice-rolling game. In addition, the English wannabe colonial displays an almost Al Gore-like smugness as he gives a rather shallow imitation of Stewie Griffin. Oh, yes, it is very chic to flame the most popular console FPS series in history, and that after stating that he didn't play the first two games; but, gee, he's entitled to his ill-informed and ignorant opinion anyway. And so he is--as are the members of the Flat Earth Society. Then, just to underline the incredible lack of understanding of the series popularity, he smugly states that he distains the multiplayer. The tone there being that only Nascar-watching, beer-swilling cretins actually lower themselves to play a multiplayer game, and on a CONSOLE, for God's sake! Oh, the cultural elitists are nothing if not amusing as they wallow in their own gooey hubris.

Once people have sorted this out, a few disagree with it, but most go on to make their own rediculous assertions.

ccesarano: First thing I should note when reading people's comments: Yahtzee is pretentious. Ccesarano then goes into tl;dr complete with an "EDITUS" just to prove that he knows of what he speaks. This leads to a miniwank on consoles vs. PCs.

Meanwhile, on page 3, Walshicus explains that that there is a lot of depth to Halo 3, just not actually, you know, in the game:

There's a metric shittonne of plot; it just isn't all put out on display. Halo's storyline [a nice mish-mash of original writing, Star Hammer, the Culture series, Aliens, Christian and Norse mythologies] is layered. You can play the games and skip every cutscene and still know what to do. You can watch the cutscenes and listen to the in-game dialogue and have a better understanding. You can hunt down every last clue and piece of information in the game, and then mix that with the novels, graphic novels, action figure biographies and the ARGs and get a greater idea of what's going on still...

But the game never forces it on you. It's integral in understanding WHY events are unfolding as they are in the games, but it's not integral in having fun within it.

And just to prove that the fanbois aren't the only ones to be wanky, Moreyman tactfully asserts: Agree with his comments or not, his flash vids are damned good and only a retarded sea monkey who'd been drinking paint stripper all day would disagree with that.

BinkyStuttocks immediatley afterwards ~~outs himself as a retarded sea monkey~~ refutes this:

If you're going to attempt to bash Halo 3 in a humourous way, at least put some humour into it. This just felt like a video version of every internet post about Halo 3. Next time choose a game that every idiot with a keyboard hasn't shit on.

And it goes on and on.

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	demonbean 2007-10-04 08:40 pm UTC (link)
	but have a bit of trouble trusting a fellow named after a mindless dice-rolling game I, personally, use my internet names as a way to display the deepest and truest aspects of my soul and my intellect. Mmmhmm. (Reply to this)(Thread)