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Avocado ([info]white_serpent) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2008-05-07 14:39:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:crazy people, flouncing, furries, otherkin, what the shit is this?

WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WANTED TO BE EATEN!
From [info]wank_report:

starblade-enkai is a very unhappy dragon otherkin. In fact, he's outraged.

Why, you ask?

I can't explain the horror better than the man can himself.

A sample:

IT REALLY PISSES ME OFF WHEN A PREDATORY FUR TURNS PREY AND THEN EVERYBODY'S EATING THEM! WHAT THE FUCK, WORLD? WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WANTED TO BE EATEN! FUCK THIS SHIT!

Don't you feel sympathetic? Of course you do!

Sadly, many of his commenters don't. They think he needs professional help. Others think he should ignore those meanies.

But he will punish everyone for their hateful lack of sympathy! He's LEAVING FOREVER.

He's totally serious about that flounce, people, because he hates you all. so. much. He'll be leaving any month now.

So much, packed into so little space.



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(Post a new comment)


[info]shinga
2008-05-08 12:56 am UTC (link)
Wow. WOW. This is amazing.

WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WANTED TO BE EATEN! FUCK THIS SHIT!

That is the most surreal angry bitching ever. I swear I want to scream this in a middle of an argument/debate one of these days just to see what happens.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]vanya_elda, 2008-05-08 01:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]deliciouschaos, 2008-05-08 01:23 am UTC
I tried! - [info]groovytastic, 2008-05-08 01:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_sun_is_up, 2008-05-08 01:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]idiom, 2008-05-08 04:44 am UTC
(no subject) - ultimi_scopuli, 2008-05-08 06:52 am UTC
(no subject) - chironstar, 2008-05-08 04:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]alya1989262, 2008-05-08 02:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vanya_elda, 2008-05-08 02:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hallidae, 2008-05-08 02:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vanya_elda, 2008-05-08 02:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hallidae, 2008-05-08 02:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kate74, 2008-05-08 07:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ainself, 2008-05-08 07:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wankismyfandom, 2008-05-08 07:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]entropicdecay, 2008-05-08 02:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]coffeebun, 2008-05-08 07:03 pm UTC

[info]kadath
2008-05-08 12:58 am UTC (link)
...what the hell did I just read?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]white_serpent, 2008-05-08 01:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]breecita, 2008-05-08 01:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kadath, 2008-05-08 01:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2008-05-08 03:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kadath, 2008-05-08 03:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2008-05-08 03:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kadath, 2008-05-08 03:53 am UTC
(no subject) - janegray, 2008-05-08 10:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vanya_elda, 2008-05-08 01:09 am UTC
(no subject) - pastri_archy, 2008-05-08 01:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mornmeril, 2008-05-10 01:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mistressrenet, 2008-05-08 03:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]capsulekei, 2008-05-08 06:07 am UTC
(no subject) - chironstar, 2008-05-08 05:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tachikoma01, 2008-05-08 05:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]florence_craye, 2008-05-08 07:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]skewed_tartan, 2008-05-08 09:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]schmoo999, 2008-05-08 09:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lysana, 2008-05-08 10:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]schmoo999, 2008-05-08 10:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]aewgliriel, 2008-05-09 07:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jerel, 2008-05-10 04:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]maureenlycaon, 2008-05-12 11:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2008-05-14 02:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]maureenlycaon, 2008-05-14 05:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2008-05-14 05:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]maureenlycaon, 2008-05-14 08:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]foresthouse, 2008-05-15 06:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]maureenlycaon, 2008-05-15 08:09 am UTC

[info]shinga
2008-05-08 01:00 am UTC (link)
Okay I just tried to read through all of it... if MC Escher and Salvador Dali had hot yaoi sex and produced a powerful offspring with their combined surrealism and that buttbaby was translated somehow into words? Everything this dude says IS THAT BABY.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]theladyfeylene, 2008-05-08 01:02 am UTC
(no subject) - chironstar, 2008-05-08 05:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]reeve, 2008-05-08 02:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]danceswithelvis, 2008-05-08 02:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wankismyfandom, 2008-05-08 08:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2008-05-08 02:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ari_o, 2008-05-08 04:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mornmeril, 2008-05-10 01:17 am UTC

[info]squeakytoy
2008-05-08 01:00 am UTC (link)
Sadly, many of his commenters don't. They think he needs professional help.

Hm. Strangely enough, I agree with the commenters.

(Reply to this)


[info]witty
2008-05-08 01:02 am UTC (link)
F_W, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I have been having a very stressful day and the thing I needed most on this earth is to hear about a psychotic furry demanding his right to be eaten.

*blows kisses*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wyf_of_bathe, 2008-05-08 01:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]churri, 2008-05-08 02:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eldritch, 2008-05-08 02:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]risha, 2008-05-08 04:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2008-05-08 06:20 am UTC

[info]sithwitch13
2008-05-08 01:02 am UTC (link)
It's kinda hard to be sympathetic when you don't understand what the everliving fuck he's saying.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]alya1989262, 2008-05-08 01:34 am UTC

[info]breecita
2008-05-08 01:03 am UTC (link)
I...no wait what?

No WHAT?

(Reply to this)


[info]sevendeadlyfun
2008-05-08 01:08 am UTC (link)
I have this crazy feeling that his rant is the furry equivalent of not being able to get cyber-sex. This makes his whole festival of creepiness substantially creepier. And the fact that he still has a way to go on the creepy scale? Is the scariest part of this whole wank...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2008-05-08 01:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sevendeadlyfun, 2008-05-08 02:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kami, 2008-05-08 02:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]missdaisy, 2008-05-08 03:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]missdaisy, 2008-05-08 03:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2008-05-08 03:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]missdaisy, 2008-05-08 03:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smashingstars, 2008-05-08 06:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]southerngaelic, 2008-05-08 12:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]caffeine_fairy, 2008-05-08 03:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]southerngaelic, 2008-05-08 04:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]hangingfire, 2008-05-08 06:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darksumomo, 2008-05-09 05:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jabberwockypie, 2008-05-10 11:24 pm UTC

[info]vanya_elda
2008-05-08 01:08 am UTC (link)
It's time I stopped caring what people think of me.

It's time I rage against machine.

It's time to be fierce.


DO YOU WANT TO BE ON TOP? *cue music*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2008-05-08 01:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wyf_of_bathe, 2008-05-08 01:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eleutheria, 2008-05-08 01:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2008-05-08 05:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chaos_theory, 2008-05-08 03:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilsqueakers, 2008-05-08 04:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vanya_elda, 2008-05-08 04:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilsqueakers, 2008-05-08 04:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vanya_elda, 2008-05-08 04:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilsqueakers, 2008-05-08 04:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mcity, 2008-05-08 04:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]beachlass, 2008-05-08 05:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cyndra_falin, 2008-05-08 06:30 am UTC

[info]nekoama
2008-05-08 01:09 am UTC (link)
I started reading this, and then had to stop. I'm bleeding a little from my ears now. Eyes too.

(Reply to this)


[info]limyaael
2008-05-08 01:12 am UTC (link)
That second link is comedy gold.

Kilroy, someone who I myself got into vore, and who I went out of my way to make a stupid birthday post, doesn't even bother typevoring me. Hell I could've offered myself to him with chocolate melted all over my body and aphrodisiacs to boot, and he would have me thrown in the garbage incinerator, like I wasn't even goot enough for the maggots at the city dump.

Typevore him or you don't love him!

You don't understand how deeply metaphorical I am. I type words, and you just stare and gawk at them, not really thinking that there may be some hidden meaning. That maybe being eaten represented my self worth, you know, to be of value to someone else?

Now I want an icon that says "You don't understand how deeply metaphorical I am."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]vanya_elda, 2008-05-08 01:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]moljn, 2008-05-08 02:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bienegold, 2008-05-08 04:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eldritch, 2008-05-08 02:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2008-05-08 06:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]unamaga, 2008-05-08 02:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]danceswithelvis, 2008-05-08 02:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]white_serpent, 2008-05-08 02:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]limyaael, 2008-05-08 02:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]missdaisy, 2008-05-08 03:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]risha, 2008-05-08 04:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]idiom, 2008-05-08 04:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wankismyfandom, 2008-05-08 08:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]coffeebun, 2008-05-08 08:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]txvoodoo, 2008-05-08 08:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]florence_craye, 2008-05-08 07:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pocketfox, 2008-05-09 01:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wook77, 2008-05-09 06:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladyofviolets, 2008-05-10 07:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]azdaja_dafema, 2008-05-11 06:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2008-05-08 06:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]catremistrae, 2008-05-08 06:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]negativecosine, 2008-05-08 08:10 pm UTC
A bit plain, but here's one - [info]entropicdecay, 2008-05-08 02:19 pm UTC
Re: A bit plain, but here's one - [info]suzycat, 2008-05-08 02:23 pm UTC

pastri_archy
2008-05-08 01:13 am UTC (link)
Bewildered-yet-hysterical laughter in background provided by: yours truly.

(Reply to this)


[info]vanya_elda
2008-05-08 01:15 am UTC (link)
I've decided to make the attempt at leaving for good coincide with my going into rehab for the stalker thing.

No. Words.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]solesakuma, 2008-05-08 01:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ari_o, 2008-05-08 04:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]photosinensis, 2008-05-09 09:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ari_o, 2008-05-09 05:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]hristaesir, 2008-05-08 05:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2008-05-08 06:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jat_sapphire, 2008-05-08 02:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2008-05-08 06:41 pm UTC

[info]groovytastic
2008-05-08 01:22 am UTC (link)
Kilroy, someone who I myself got into vore, and who I went out of my way to make a stupid birthday post, doesn't even bother typevoring me.

So, wishing someone a happy birthday = being eaten by them? What do they do if you get them a present?!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sithwitch13, 2008-05-08 03:18 am UTC

[info]llama_treats
2008-05-08 01:23 am UTC (link)
Never bitten, twice crazy!

(Reply to this)


[info]elainemc
2008-05-08 01:24 am UTC (link)
Wait, wait-- this isn't THE Starblade, is it??

Starblade Riven "Fuck you, I'm a dragon!" Darksquall?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]white_serpent, 2008-05-08 01:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mornmeril, 2008-05-10 01:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]panther3751, 2008-05-08 02:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vanya_elda, 2008-05-08 02:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bienegold, 2008-05-08 04:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bienegold, 2008-05-08 04:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]photosinensis, 2008-05-09 09:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bizzle, 2008-05-12 09:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]entropicdecay, 2008-05-08 02:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]marlo, 2008-05-08 09:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kumquat_of_doom, 2008-05-09 01:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mornmeril, 2008-05-10 01:32 am UTC

[info]deliciouschaos
2008-05-08 01:25 am UTC (link)
"VORE IS WEIRD" is a mini-meme amongst my dormies. Never before has it been more applicable.

(Reply to this)


[info]jkefka
2008-05-08 01:26 am UTC (link)
I hit the point in that second link where he jumped from a paragraph rant about Christians to one about Moot and just kind of...had to stop. Before I put my head through my screen.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]negativecosine, 2008-05-08 02:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]photosinensis, 2008-05-09 09:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]negativecosine, 2008-05-09 09:23 am UTC

[info]sepiamagpie
2008-05-08 01:30 am UTC (link)
Glorious.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - pastri_archy, 2008-05-08 01:41 am UTC

[info]anarchicq
2008-05-08 01:31 am UTC (link)
I think we need a rousing sing along of the song "Mien Teil" RIGHT NOW.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]skarrow, 2008-05-08 02:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]entropicdecay, 2008-05-08 02:24 pm UTC

[info]studyinscarlet
2008-05-08 01:39 am UTC (link)
You know what makes me happy about his posts? The fact that I don't have a bloody clue what the hell he's going on about. I think I'm better off that way.

(Reply to this)


[info]emiweebee
2008-05-08 01:47 am UTC (link)
...what?

(Reply to this)


[info]puipui
2008-05-08 01:48 am UTC (link)
I like the part where he compares himself to Jesus and Ayn Rand. And coconuts. That's just... wow. That's impressive, right there.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]white_serpent, 2008-05-08 01:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]komorebi, 2008-05-08 06:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]churri, 2008-05-08 02:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]danceswithelvis, 2008-05-08 02:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2008-05-08 02:35 am UTC
Dragons haz a flavor? - [info]tehrin, 2008-05-08 03:01 am UTC
Re: Dragons haz a flavor? - [info]panther3751, 2008-05-08 03:09 am UTC
Re: Dragons haz a flavor? - [info]panther3751, 2008-05-08 03:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kami, 2008-05-08 03:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]danceswithelvis, 2008-05-08 03:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2008-05-08 07:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]shaggydogstail, 2008-05-08 03:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]caffeine_fairy, 2008-05-08 03:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2008-05-14 03:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]caffeine_fairy, 2008-05-14 03:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2008-05-08 06:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2008-05-08 07:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vito_excalibur, 2008-05-08 07:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]risha, 2008-05-08 04:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2008-05-08 04:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]empy, 2008-05-08 11:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]castellated, 2008-05-11 08:22 am UTC

[info]smashingstars
2008-05-08 01:50 am UTC (link)
Oof. I feel genuinely bad for the guy, even though he seems like one of those people who does an online favor for someone and thinks they owe him the world in return.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]pyratejenni, 2008-05-08 01:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smashingstars, 2008-05-08 02:27 am UTC

[info]shaysdays
2008-05-08 01:52 am UTC (link)
I have a crazy mental image of a dude in a girly dragon suit sobbing as he covers himself with glopped-on peanut butter and blubbers the chorus of, "Take On Me."

"Taaaake Meeeee Ooonblahguhguhglubghaaaa..."

This is the awesomest thing my brain has ever produced.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]ms_treesap, 2008-05-08 02:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]churri, 2008-05-08 02:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jellibean, 2008-05-08 04:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]beachlass, 2008-05-08 05:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wankismyfandom, 2008-05-08 08:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]southerngaelic, 2008-05-08 01:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]blankverses, 2008-05-08 08:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bienegold, 2008-05-08 10:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]blankverses, 2008-05-08 10:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]shaysdays, 2008-05-09 10:59 pm UTC


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