FFML Wank... Like It's In Short Supply
I thought I'd post up this wank-tastic reply to C&C to what may or may not have been an Eva troll-fic... or just a bad one. It's all here, people... "Brush up on your other languages", "English isn't my first language so I'll screw it up all I want spank you very much"... TASTE THE WANKY FLAVA! Courtesy of Aeon Flux... no, not the anime, just someone with an unimaginative penname.
(Unfortunately, since it's an email list, all I can do is C&P the reply, so it's kinda long...)




Hi there. Thanks for the smart input
(a very rare thing, I must stress).

--- Denise Cameron <denisecameron@eastlink.ca> wrote: >

>>
>>
>
>>> > REMARKS.
>>> > ShinseikiEVANGELION is copyrighted by GAINAX, etc. etc. et
>>> > coetera, blah blah blah, iyada iyada iyada, end.
>>> >
>
>> - And people think this sort of disclaimer is better then my absent one? ^-^
>> Anyway, moving on.


My point was to show how useless and annoying disclaimers are.




>>> > **************************** NIHIL OBSTAT ****************************
>>> >
>
>> - Uhh...Nihil Obstat? Maybe I'm slow, but...sorry, I don't get it.


Brush up your Latin(and your knowledge on Christianism as well).



>>> > manner. In other words, the life of Katsuragi Misato was going to end
>>> > very soon. Besides, as they already knew that she had come to know
>
>>
>> - Maybe get rid of the word "that", there, it sort of trips me. And put a
>> comma after "knew".


Gomen, just the way I write, just the way I think when I think in English,
which is not my mother tongue BTW.


>>> > ultimate decision about the future of mankind would be his and only
>>> > his. And she didn't care at all. A world without Kaji could ever be
>
>>
>> - Should probably be "Could a world without Kaji ever be" etc


Same as above.



>>> > worth saving? A world that had been planned to contain no space for
>
>>
>> - Again, "Could a world" etc


Idem.



>>> > With all her haesitations just overcome, Misato kissed Shinji in the
>
>>
>> - hesitations.


Oh yeah, and it's wrong to write anaemia, gynaecology, Caesar, etc.
Don't presume that the dictionary writers know everything about etymology.


>> And 'on the', not 'in the', unless she's doing some sort of
>> modified french kiss...


You are right, she really did it.



>>> > he had never been 100% human, now there existed no one nor no thing
>
>>
>> - Huh? He's never been 100% human? But...hmm. Not that I'm disbelieving
>> you outright, but do you have any proof of that?


*Analytical* evidence. Shinji, Asuka, Rei, Touji, etc., were genetically
modified people. Ordinary humans are unable to interact with an artificial Angel.



>> I'd be interested in seeing
>> it.
>> I've watched the whole thing (movies included) a few times, and I never
>> came to the conclusion that Shinji was not completely human.


Already answered.


>>> > of The King Of The Universe without being harmed lethally, Katsuragi
>>> > Misato died in piece.
>
>>
>> - Err...peace, not piece ^-^ Glad to know I'm not the only one who does
>> typos like that.


Kuso! I didn?t notice it! Arigatou gozaimashita.


>>> >
>>> > Part III.
>>> >
>>> > This was the day on which Ikari Gendou screwed Ayanami Rei for the
>>> > last time. The Enlightenment of Ikari Shinji inevitably started the
>
>>
>> - But it's Ritsuko that he...wait, unless this is something you've
>> purposefully
>> changed?


No. It should be quite evident that Gendou and Rei had always a "thing"
going on. And it also should be self-evident that it was because of jealousy
that Ritsuko destroyed the copies of Ayanami-chan.


>> Because he doesn't even try to do that


So sure? Because it does not appear on the screen, then
it never happened? Again, in this case too the evidences are not
direct, but are made clear by the careful analysis of ALL the *details*.



>> until after Rei starts to
>> merge with that Angel (or become possessed by it...however you see it.)
>>
>
>>> > Part V.
>>> >
>>> > On the morning after, the Mass-Production Models from Seele were
>>> > easily destroyed by the newborn supernatural powers of Asuka, Shinji
>>> > and Ayanami Rei. During the next nine days, the humans who had
>
>>
>> - I'm still iffy about how Misato getting drunk, and making herself smell
>> of garlic and onion, then having sex with Shinji, gave him supernatural
>> powers. You're saying these powers were naturally in Shinji and could
>> only awaken once he's experienced the height of physical pleasure? Or
>> did it have to be a drunken, smelly Misato?


Both. And it had to be Misato _or_ any other woman who *really*
loved Shinji.


>>> > survived the so-called Second Impact were completely deleted by Eva
>>> > Unit-00, Eva Unit-01 and Eva Unit-02 with logic and efficiency. Having
>>> > the surface of the planet been conveniently purified, the new Age Of
>
>>
>> - be, not been. Or maybe "After the surface of the planet was conveniently"
>> etc




Been ,not be. It seems you don't like the uncommon word-orders alright.


>>> > Gold finally began. According to what never ever would be mentioned by
>>> > the Dead Sea Scrolls, now Mother Earth belonged to the Children Of
>>> > Vishnu again. 'Twas yesterday once more.
>>> >
>
>>
>> - Interesting ending, though I admit that I am still confused.


Wakarimasu. My good friend Patrick Drazen from Chicago, author of the
interesting book "Anime Explosion", wrote that unless one reads a lot of
good texts and surf a lot on the decent sides of the Internet, the anime fan
will keep seeing only a tiny fraction of ALL that is on the screen. But fear
not. He is 52 years old, and I am 40. You still have a whole lot of time
ahead =^.^=


>> You had some
>> good ideas in there, but perhaps if you did a bit more development and made
>> the parts longer and more explained, it would help. You have a good writing
>> style, too, actual plot events and action aside.



>> - Also, it's nice to see a fic from this anime, here. I had thought to do
>> one, but
>> it seems like such a task. How do you continue it? Rewriting, as you did, is
>> probably the only real way, considering how many million different ways
>> there
>> are to interpret the actual ending. Of course, that alone could make a
>> million
>> different fanfics that could be potentially good...^-^



Mata, doumo arigatou gozaimasu.

signed: G. von K.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::\\












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