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insignificant other ([info]snacky) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2009-12-27 20:52:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:bitter so bitter, crazy people, ding dong the witch is dead, i fought the law and the law boggled, i see stupid people, lying liar that lies, person: turimel, person: victoria bitter, plucky girl detective, stop giving strangers money you idiots, this is the wank that never ends, what the shit is this?

The Not So Triumphant Return of Victoria Bitter, aka thanfiction, part the third
Lost in the comments of the last post, [info]julian_black tells us that idiomagic has spit out the kool-aid.

The evil twin is yesterday's news, people. Now there's an UNDEAD SHAMAN-WIZARD.

Yeah, I'll repeat that: UNDEAD SHAMAN-WIZARD.

I don't even know. Does it top channeling fictional hobbits? You decide.



ETA: HOLD THE PHONE: UNDEAD SHAMAN-WIZARD EMAILS HERE! All personal info redacted, of course. Thanks [info]bacon_lover!

Also, idiomagic would like us to know that She never drank the kool-aid. She was *cue dramatic music* THE MOLE!

I dunno, there's a reason Deep Throat's identity was never revealed...





Reminder: please use male pronouns when referring to VB/thanfiction, and leave the transfail in the other post, thanks.


(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]eleutheria
2009-12-28 02:57 pm UTC (link)
I read that as hump them on a gold-plated jetski. It's hilarious either way, but I like my visual better.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]jkefka
2009-12-28 03:27 pm UTC (link)
CANNOT UNTHINK AAAAAAAAAA

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]tofuknight
2009-12-28 07:18 pm UTC (link)
Let the cackling commence!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]irised
2009-12-29 12:01 am UTC (link)
Oh, how romantic! And if they were dolphins instead of sharks, he would die in a way they couldn't ever print on his headstone*.







*disclaimer: I'm not wishing death on him. But someone once told me that the force of dolphin ejaculate could blow your head off and, true or not, that is an image that has never left my mind...

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]louifee
2009-12-29 01:06 am UTC (link)
http://www.sexwork.com/family/dolphins1.html

Apparently it's true!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Prehensile penises.
[info]irised
2009-12-29 02:10 am UTC (link)
PREHENSILE PENISES.

Q6) Where can I find a dolphin to mate with?

A6) Aquariums are a bad choice, for many reasons.

LOL

Oh my god. I think I love you, and also, FW.

Imagine a happy dolphin sighting trip with all the family, and then little Timmy sees a dolphin zooming around carrying things clutched in his erect penis ... "mommy, I wanna try that!"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Prehensile penises.
[info]louifee
2009-12-29 02:15 am UTC (link)
I love the QnA - just in case you wanted to try for yourself!

Haha oh god, I can imagine the parents' horrified looks now...and then the letter campaign! (now with more facebook groups!)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Prehensile penises.
[info]irised
2009-12-29 02:34 am UTC (link)
I'm surprised there weren't airline style diagrams XD

Oh shhhiiiit I was just thinking of possible facebook group names, typed out Stop Dolphins From Raping My Children's Eyes and then realised, well, considering they're known when horny to rape any available orifice of random unlucky fishes ... DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD: STOP MY BRAIN I WANT TO GET OFF OH GOD WHY AM I LAUGHING SO MUCH

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Prehensile penises.
[info]louifee
2009-12-29 02:36 am UTC (link)
Oh god, diagrams! x.O

BECAUSE IT'S KIND OF HILARIOUS in a trainwrecky way. So the FB group would then just be "Stop Dolphins From Raping My Children"? How would they even do that (without just killing them off)?! Haha.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Prehensile penises. - [info]irised, 2009-12-29 02:46 am UTC
Re: Prehensile penises. - [info]louifee, 2009-12-29 03:15 am UTC
Re: Prehensile penises. - [info]irised, 2009-12-29 03:56 am UTC

[info]ickle_snowflake
2009-12-29 08:26 pm UTC (link)
You know what's horrifying? At some point someone is going to say something to me where these new learnings are relevant, and I will probably respond without thinking (as I often do) and then have to explain how I know about dolphin sex...

Life with a memory for odd trivia was so much easier before the internet.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]louifee
2009-12-30 12:51 am UTC (link)
Or is it easier? "I stumbled across it on the internet and couldn't click away...trainwreck syndrome, y'know?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]ickle_snowflake
2009-12-31 02:27 am UTC (link)
IDK, I'd get away with that with some, but my mum would probably be like "What were you doing that you stumbled into zoophilia...? Hon, if you need to tell me you're a furry... just know we'll love you no matter what."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]louifee, 2009-12-31 02:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ickle_snowflake, 2009-12-31 02:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]louifee, 2009-12-31 02:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ickle_snowflake, 2009-12-31 02:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]louifee, 2009-12-31 02:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ickle_snowflake, 2009-12-31 03:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eilisliana, 2009-12-31 03:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]louifee, 2009-12-31 03:27 am UTC

[info]eilisliana
2009-12-30 01:57 am UTC (link)
I agree, I get odd looks from extended family often for my 'interesting' trivia learnings.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]ickle_snowflake
2009-12-31 02:29 am UTC (link)
"Apparently dolphins' bellies go pink if they're turned on... did I just say that out loud?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)


tetradecimal
2009-12-29 01:10 am UTC (link)
Great, now I'll fear dolphin spooge forever.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]irised
2009-12-29 02:17 am UTC (link)
Tangentally related: What do you do if an elephant comes through your window?

Swim.

I'm trying to work out a dolphin version but damned if I can think of a decent punchline ...

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


tetradecimal
2009-12-29 02:19 am UTC (link)
*sobs quietly in a corner*

My childhood... my beautiful childhood.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]irised
2009-12-29 02:22 am UTC (link)
Awww. So you won't want to hear the one about Cinderella then :D

Look! Adorbable baby Tapir!!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]cinnamonical
2009-12-29 10:58 am UTC (link)
Tangentally related: What do you do if an elephant comes through your window?

Swim.

I laughed way too fucking hard at that. I am a bad person which is why I'm here on FW.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]irised
2009-12-29 11:06 am UTC (link)
I find it's best to tell it at the tail end of a whole lot of really innocuous elephant jokes, like the ones about how does an elephant hide in various fruit patches, what happens when it gets inside your fridge, how does it fit in a mini* etc :D


*two in the front, two in the back!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]kumquat_of_doom
2009-12-29 06:13 pm UTC (link)
I just laughed way too damn hard at that.

...And then went downstairs to tell my father. The look on his face when he got it was fucking priceless.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]irised
2009-12-30 06:04 am UTC (link)
That is awesome. I love it when it sneaks up on people.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sylvacoer
2009-12-30 05:56 am UTC (link)
...
...
...
... oh hey, I just got it! :D

... 8X... XDDDDDDD

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]irised
2009-12-30 06:02 am UTC (link)
LOL

Best. Reaction. Yet.

Share it with your family! :D

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sylvacoer, 2009-12-30 07:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]irised, 2009-12-30 07:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sylvacoer, 2009-12-30 07:37 am UTC
Late to the ballgame but...
[info]moonjaguar
2009-12-30 10:46 pm UTC (link)
His son? A sparrow. His wife? A shark.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

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