Entry tags:

author entitlement, authors, creator wank, doesn't mean what you think it means, fanfic, suck it up and deal, writers are often pompous douches, your kink is not okay

Diana Gabaldon, author of the wildly popular Outlander series, has an opinion on fan fiction: I think it’s immoral, I _know_ it’s illegal, and it makes me want to barf whenever I’ve inadvertently encountered some of it involving my characters.

Highlights include:

Writing fanfic is just like breaking into someone's house.
Fanfic is WAY WAY WAY TOO PORNY omg ick people have sexual fantasies!*
What to do about an auction offering fanfic to raise money for a cancer patient? She doesn't want to "seem heartless"! So she seeks advice in the comments. Which are mostly full of "Fanfic? I have never heard of such a despicable load of garbage! Also, CRUSH THAT CANCER PATIENT!"

ETA: Unpublished author Eddie Louise (who cannot write the word "shit" and seems to fail spectacularly at reading comprehension) offers fanfic writers A CHALLENGE! Accept it if you dare, sniveling pedo thieves!

ETA 2: Previously, Ms Gabaldon has said fanfic is like selling your children into white slavery. Well. Now. I don't even know what to do with that.

ETA 3: Smart Bitches, Trashy Books has some discussion on the topic.

ETA 4: And bookshop on LJ/DW has a rebuttal.

ETA 5: See what happens when I leave the sweet embrace of the internet for a few hours? Ms. Gabaldon updates her blog!

ETA 6: Evidently Ms. Gabaldon deleted all evidence of her hissyfit, but some wankas have screencaps in this thread.

ETA 7:

kate_nepevu has screencaps and the text of Gabaldon's posts here. And via

alchemynerd, more screencaps available here:

http://www.sendspace.com/file/tiz4vp
http://www.sendspace.com/file/ibidpj
http://www.sendspace.com/file/r6zik6
http://www.sendspace.com/file/hlknqo
http://www.sendspace.com/file/d9alsh

Thanks for all the links! :)

MOD REMINDER: Remember, my little wankas, we DO NOT troll the wank. Nor do we write fanfic after the author has specifically requested people not and post it in the comments here, no matter how tempting it may be. Carry on. oh god my inbox ow ow

*Just as a point of interest, I was a bookseller for 12 years, and had several customers tell me about the sex scenes in her books. Some were pro ("My friend told me to read these books for the sex scenes, and she was totally right, they are so hot, this is best thing to happen to my sex life in years!") and some were con ("What is up with all the sex all the time? Where's the story?"), but one thing you can't say about her books is that they're sexual-fantasy free. :D

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ekaterinv
2010-05-03 10:37 pm UTC (link)

That was my reaction, and I looked her up on amazon.com. Here is the excerpt they give from one of her books:

I was lame and sore in every muscle when I woke next morning. I shuffled to the privy closet, then to the wash basin. My innards felt like churned butter. It felt as though I had been beaten with a blunt object, I reflected, then thought that that was very near the truth. The blunt object in question was visible as I came back to bed, looking now relatively harmless. Its possessor [Jamie] woke as I sat next to him, and examined me with something that looked very much like male smugness.

But anyone who writes porn about her characters should feel very, very bad.

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	shinysandals 2010-05-03 11:11 pm UTC (link)
	I just know my husband is going to come in here any minute to find out why I'm laughing so hard. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	syncopation 2010-05-03 11:13 pm UTC (link)
	What in the world... (Reply to this)(Parent)

	eleutheria 2010-05-03 11:56 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, that's horrid! Now I'm very glad I've refrained from reading that series. (Though I've listened to two books from her gay male Regency mystery series, and they're not like that. Even if they do read like they're written by someone who wants backpats for writing a gay character, but won't write him actually having sex or a relationship with somebody.) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	pariforma 2010-05-04 01:30 am UTC (link)
	Poor Lord John. She has to distinguish him from the bad gay character by not letting him have sex. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	msilverstar 2010-05-04 12:10 am UTC (link)
	maybe the fans just want her characters to have good sex sometimes? (Reply to this)(Parent)

	cleolinda 2010-05-04 12:22 am UTC (link)
	My innards felt like churned butter. That's hot. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	rani 2010-05-04 01:21 am UTC (link)
	"Churning the butter" is my new favorite sex euphemism. It like Amish dirty-talk. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	barankhy 2010-05-04 04:58 am UTC (link)
	...they were slowly settling into a solid state while buttermilk collects on top of them? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	cleolinda 2010-05-04 05:06 am UTC (link)
	If I squint really hard, that kinda sounds dirty. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

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barankhy, 2010-05-04 05:38 am UTC

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cleolinda, 2010-05-04 05:47 am UTC

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spawn_of_kong, 2010-05-04 06:37 am UTC

	sylvacoer 2010-05-04 05:53 am UTC (link)
	Apparently, I blanked that from my memory when I read the book because the mental image I have right now is... DDD8 (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	napalmnacey 2010-05-04 04:41 pm UTC (link)
	Weird. My brain parsed that smiley aurally as "DUH-DUH-DUH-DAYT!" (Reply to this)(Parent)

	talec 2010-05-04 08:17 am UTC (link)
	I... I think that's a good description of diarrhea. squints (Reply to this)(Parent)

	cesare 2010-05-05 02:36 am UTC (link)
	That's hot. supplies apropos icon (Reply to this)(Parent)

	3jane 2010-05-04 12:53 am UTC (link)
	... is it wrong that I read [m]y innards felt like churned butter and thought, "Wait, is she writing Paula Deen RPF?" (Although I would read Paula Deen/Land o' Lakes Butter Maiden friendship fic in a heartbeat. Especially if it was a space opera with robots-type of never mind I have said too much. >.>) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	agent_hyatt 2010-05-04 02:46 am UTC (link)
	Re: Your icon... I would watch the movie if they went with that casting. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	librarianmouse 2010-05-04 06:35 am UTC (link)
	I want to read that so bad. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	mister_terrific 2010-05-04 09:15 pm UTC (link)
	Mrs. Terrific and I are firmly of the opinion that Paula Deen is a serial killer who marries, mates, and then kills her husbands... ...with the power of butter. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ihateyouall 2010-05-11 08:15 pm UTC (link)
	Dude, you should totally write this fic! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	bobafeis 2010-05-04 01:06 am UTC (link)
	Um. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	the_sun_is_up 2010-05-04 08:30 am UTC (link)
	So is this guy's dick like an egg-beater or something? Ugh. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	glitterandlube 2010-05-05 04:42 am UTC (link)
	Okay, this lady wins, that is much grosser than anything I have stolen from 4chan in the past week. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	the_labrat_army 2010-05-05 06:19 am UTC (link)
	El-oh-el. And not in the "I'm laughing with her" way. Also geez, can't I come across one romance novel where the sex doesn't leave the female feeling like a giant bruise the next morning? How is that supposed to be sexy? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	ekaterinv 2010-05-05 06:34 am UTC (link)
	I know! I have never in my life had sex that left me feeling like that -- where do they get this from? (Reply to this)(Parent)

	xturtle 2010-05-05 05:09 pm UTC (link)
	Is male smugness markedly different from female smugness? Inquiring minds want to know! With pictures! (Reply to this)(Parent)

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