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fandom_wank's thoughts on yaoi, movie wank, pixar, reviews, someone is wrong on the internet!, stop sharing your thoughts, writers are often pompous douches

Wank machine keeps on rollin'
1. Pixar makes incredible, mind-blowing third movie in Toy Story series.
2. Rotten Tomatoes logs over 130 reviews - all positive.
3. Toy Story 3 gets it's first (so far, only) bad reviews.
4. Internet explodes. (Also here.)

The wank seems to be focused on Armond White's review, as he is known for seemingly giving any review that goes against the general consenus. (He inexplicably seems in favour of Transformers 2, for instance.) He also doesn't appear to have actually watched the movie (identifying Hamm as a villain.) His negative review was actually predicted by a number of commenters in this earlier article, asking readers to predict where Toy Story 3 would end up on the Tomatometer rating.

It's all very dramatic, with wank in every corner. But of course, the most important Toy Story-related argument is and always will always be: Buzz/Jessie or Woody/Jessie?*

*Anyone's who's seen the movie will know the right answer to this.

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UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW

beejium
2010-06-19 06:46 pm UTC (link)

So the BF and I have just decided that Toy Story 4 will be the movie where the toys all realize that they're actually all dead, and are now toys that represent how each of them died. Buzz was an astronaut that died in a shuttle crash, Woody had a snake in his boot, Jessie was buried alive, Potato Head was a mob informant who had all his parts removed when he was found out, Hamm was an overeating banker who died of a massive coronary, Slinky was torn apart by dogs, etc.

Naturally, they'll all meet an action figure of Gene Hunt in order to come to terms with this revelation.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW ariadne484 2010-06-19 06:55 pm UTC (link)
	.... damn, but I want that story now. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW persona 2010-06-19 06:58 pm UTC (link)
	... me too. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW kelmendi 2010-06-19 06:59 pm UTC (link)
	This is fandom. Surely someone must have written it by now. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW beejium 2010-06-19 07:03 pm UTC (link)
	gets on phone to Pixar (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW cinnamonical 2010-06-19 08:19 pm UTC (link)
	Same here. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW coffee_mug 2010-06-19 11:19 pm UTC (link)
	YOUR MIND IS FANTASTIC FOR COMING UP WITH THIS. Whole new appreciation for Toy Story with this. :D (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW beejium 2010-06-19 11:43 pm UTC (link)
	When I was 12 and really big into Toy Story, me and my friends pretty much specialized in coming up with brain-breaking sequels to the movies. One involved Alien toys. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW tardiscontrol 2010-06-20 04:55 am UTC (link)
	Woody had a snake in his boot You have no idea how hard I laughed at this. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW beejium 2010-06-20 05:03 am UTC (link)
	"I have had it with these motherfucking snakes in my motherfucking boots!" (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW everstar 2010-06-20 07:44 pm UTC (link)
	JJ Abrams likes your ideas and wishes to subscribe to your newsletter. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW kamiki_seto 2010-06-21 06:23 pm UTC (link)
	I love this...it fits.... You realize you just spoiled the anime Haibane Renmei too?! GENIUS! I really hope someone writes this.... (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: UNEXPECTED ASHES TO ASHES SPOILERS BELOW chibikaijuu 2010-06-29 09:05 pm UTC (link)
	YES. (Reply to this)(Parent)

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