Henry Miller has a fandom...and it's pretty damn vocal.
Sex scenes can be really funny. Badly-written sex scenes can be absolutely hilarious. Since there are a lot of badly-written sex scenes in the world, the denizens of LJ's weepingcock take it upon themselves to select the best of the worst and laugh uproariously at it. Or cringe. Or possibly laugh uproariously in a cringing fashion. It depends on the excerpt.

Anyhow, pirsquar posts this amazing excerpt, for the enjoyment of the entire community.


"At night when I look at Boris' goatee lying on the pillow I get hysterical. O Tania, where now is that warm cunt of yours, those fat, heavy garters, those soft, bulging thighs? There is a bone in my prick six inches long. I will ream out every wrinkle in your cunt, Tania, big with seed. I will send you home to your Sylvester with an ache in your belly and your womb turned inside out. Your Sylvester! Yes, he knows how to build a fire, but I know how to inflame a cunt. I shoot hot bolts into you, Tania, I make your ovaries incandescent. Your Sylvester is a little jealous now? He feels something, does he? He feels the remnants of my big prick. I have set the shores a little wider. I have ironed out the wrinkles. After me you can take on stallions, bulls, rams, drakes, St. Bernards. You can stuff toads, bats, lizards up your rectum. You can shit arpeggios if you like, or string a zither across your navel. I am fucking you, Tania, so that you'll stay fucked. And if you are afraid of being fucked publicly I will fuck you privately. I will tear off a few hairs from your cunt and paste them on Boris' chin. I will bite into your clitoris and spit out two franc pieces…"


The reaction is a standard mix of 'lol', 'wtf', and 'OW'...

...at least, until Loyal Defender Of The Literary Mighty deborahkla charges in to express her displeasure with the mere posting of this blurb.

Why?

Because it was written by Henry Miller.

Apparently, if you are a Noted Figure Of Literature, you are incapable of writing bad porn, regardless of what our eyes might be telling us. She makes sure to inform us of this. She even did it twice, in the exact same wording.


Wait a minute, folks! This is HENRY MILLER!!! I remember when his books were banned! You have to remember that all his books - including Tropic of Cancer, considered his finest work - were originally published in the 1920s when words like "prick" and "cunt" and "fuck" were never, EVER spoken aloud outside a brothel--and certainly not by regular folks, in bed or out.

I have to disagree wholeheartedly on this entry in weepingcock. It may sound funny to all of you now, but in the 1920s it was downright revolutionary, and it continued to be until the books were finally published in the mid-sixties, almost 40 years after they were banned. Henry Miller was a true poet, the James Joyce of obscenity and smut, and those of us who write both owe him a debt of gratitude for bringing the wild and woolly and truly passionate side of sex out into the open.


Despite the condescending tone, the weepingcock natives are actually quite reasonable in pointing out that funny sex is not discriminating, and 'great authors' are not immune to mockery if they write and publish something weepingcock-worthy. For deborahkla, however, 'reasonable disagreement' translates into 'OMFG EVERYONE'S ATTACKING ME'. So she attacks back...despite not being attacked in the first place. (She has mastered the use of the c&p comment, for sure -- there are several in there that she copies verbatim into multiple threads.)

She also flounces out of the community.

The only problem there is that she keeps right on posting answers to comments, actively telling people that 'she's out of the community now'. Her logic flaw is pointed out to her numerous times.

She reacts, naturally, by doing the most reasonable, mature thing possible.

She messages the mods.


To both the moderators at weepingcock

Dear moderators,

I disagreed with a posting at weepingcock that did not identify a quote from Henry Miller and was attacked for it. When I reacted defensively, I continued to be attacked. Finally, cwitch pointed out that everyone was fair game, and I agreed with her, but this wasn't enough for everyone. They continued to attack me and I continued to attempt to deflect their attacks. When it became clear that no one was ever going to forgive me for having had a difference of opinion, I left the community. Two hours after I had left the community yet ANOTHER person came along and attacked me with yet another nasty, uncalled for comment.

I am hereby asking your permission to delete all my comments in the post in question so that I may no longer receive nasty comments from people. Please let me know if I have permission to do so. Thank you.

Yours sincerely,

DeborahKLA

(Of course just turning off comment notifications wouldn't be good enough -- the comments would still be there for people to make nasty, uncalled-for responses to, and she'd be obliged to go LOOK to see what those responses are, and then she'd have to respond, and...)

When she doesn't receive an answer in a timely fashion, she messages again:

Dear Moderators of weepingcock,

People continue to harass me with comments. Please give me permission to delete all the comments I made in the posting I referenced in my previous message so that people will leave me alone. Thank you.

Yours sincerely,

DeborahKLA

When she again doesn't receive a reply in a timely fashion, she assumes that silence means assent and begins deleting all her comments anyway.

It is, however, worth noting that the first message was received at 5:33am Pacific time.

The second one?

5:42am.

(I have already spoken with the mods, and they are very ashamed about their slothfulness leading to such a mishap. They promise that in the future they will be awake 24/7 to handle inquiries and will respond to all messages within a matter of seconds, even if that message requires a large multi-paragraph answer.)

One of the mods did respond, though, and she was kind enough to bestow a reply on us.

Oh, and those deleted comments? Can't escape the screencaps.


I don't know about all of you, but I definitely feel my ovaries incandescing right now.