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MOD ANNOUNCEMENT: Fandom_wank Tenth Anniversary!
Hello, wankas!

To celebrate our tenth anniversary on JF, we will be having a deathmatch of the biggest wankers/wanks we've seen in our ten years here (if you are familiar with the deathmatches I host on Livejournal, this will be done in a similar fashion).

Starting on Saturday, March 9, we will begin posting polls, and you can vote for one contestant in each match. By March 17th (actual anniversary date) we will have worked our way down to the two biggest vote-getters, and you will vote for the winner in a final poll.

The contestants are both wank all-stars (people), and some of biggest/most popular wanks. Thanks for all your suggestions in the last post! Here's the list:

Lee Goldberg (the ones in which this guy HAAAAAAAAAAAATES fanfic and can't shut up about it)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/tag/person:+lee+goldberg

Chancery Stone (the ones in which this lady is BATSHIT)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/tag/person:+chancery+stone

Usagi Kou (the ones in which... you know, I'm still not sure exactly what went on there)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/tag/person:+usagi+kou

Victoria Bitter/Jordan Wood/Andy Blake/thanfiction (the ones in which I am only going to say this once: we will not tolerate transfail in any discussion about)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/tag/person:+victoria+bitter
http://www.journalfen.net/community/clairvoyantwank/485975.html

FPB (the ones in which this guy really hates HP fandom, FW, and pretty much everyone)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/tag/person:+fpb

Clan Mitchell (the one in which some BNFs spectacularly lose their collective shit)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1250964.html

Bartending in the dark (the one in which we take a walk on the darkside of the HP sorting communities)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/726096.html

His wife? A horse (the one in which we learn of human/equine matrimony)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/otf_wank/519621.html

The Biting Faery and incest is creepy (the one in which The Biting Faery is repeatedly told she's an idiot)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/829098.html

Dumbledore is gay (the one that's just the tip of the iceberg of HP wank)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1116732.html

Frosting/icing wank (the one in which we boggled over the delicious wankery)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/otf_wank/578401.html

Perhaps I have a special anus? (the one in which we learned the answer to that question)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/otf_wank/288068.html

Strikethrough Two: Electric Boogalo (the one in which Aja yells "Fire!")
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1099610.html?thread=158234202#t158234202

God's magical pubic hairs (the one in which we learned you can wank hard about things outside of fandom)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/120918.html

Inner circle wank (the one in which Aja is the twattiest twat in twatsville)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/202284.html

Please Lord Voldemort, join my ratings community (the one in which we see JF get reported to LJ for stealing their code)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/i_wank/85839.html

BJR outwalks a hurricane (the one in which... well, I've already given it away)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/otf_wank/297653.html?thread=10886837#t10886837

Snapewives on an Astral Plane (the one in which we learn about love on the Astral Plane)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1015949.html

Crystalwank (the one that broke us all)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/374922.html

Deletiongate and Fandom_Love (the ones in which there are shenanigans with the f_w cabal and we are all wankers here)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/445091.html (just start there and move forward :D)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/2005/06/23/ (again, start there, but I think the wankiest stuff went down in the system journal: http://www.journalfen.net/users/system/29866.html)

Diana Gabaldon has an opinion on fanfic (the one in which we find out it isn't good)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1246633.html

Anne Rice (the one in which we are guilty of interrogating the text from the wrong perspective)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/515245.html

Msscribe story on Bad_penny (the one in which a puppet master secretly ruled an entire fandom, plus all of us here at FW)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/bad_penny/1074.html (that's the beginning, just keep going, we'll see you in a few days)

My ponies hate you now (the one in which we found yet another catchphrase)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1156436.html

Cousinjean (the one in which fanfic should be a paying job, and many links are now sadly deleted)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/776590.html

Dan Fogelberg's llamas (the one in which we learn of a strange, torrid saga)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1115089.html

Laptopgate (the one in which things get very, very ugly)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/572867.html

Kittenmommy signs her posts (the ones in which we learn NO ONE SHOULD EVER SIGN THEIR POSTS EVER)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/otf_wank/513233.html and
http://www.journalfen.net/community/wankitywank/21267.html

Hellfire and Jira and incest and racism (the one in which there's a clusterfuck of epic proportions)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/wankitywank/8776.html

Domlijah tinhats (the ones which make us nostalgic for the old days of lotrips wank)
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/6692.html
http://www.journalfen.net/community/dl_anon/ (just start at the beginning and keep going :D)

Lady Sybilla and Russet Noon (the ones which make us think "hey, how DID 50 Shades of Grey get published?")
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1201887.html
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1203831.html
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1204629.html
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1205739.html
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1207204.html
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1209269.html
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1212553.html

Lexicongate (the one in which I am really, really glad Cleo has a wiki, since ours is down and I had to find all these other wanks by combing the memories and tags, or googling, and oh god I am so tired *sob*)
http://cleoland.pbworks.com/w/page/10373409/Lexicongate

So read up on all those and review, and we'll see you on Saturday when the voting begins!

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(Post a new comment)

	rhiannonmr 2013-03-08 01:45 pm UTC (link)
	Oh man! There goes my weekend! (Reply to this)

	iamnotyourmuse 2013-03-08 02:36 pm UTC (link)
	Who's got a day off today and is snowed in and can't do the things she was planning on doing and so will instead spend the day reading classic wank? ME! Screw shoveling. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	sgaana 2013-03-09 05:20 am UTC (link)
	I shoveled! Also I finished re-reading the entire Msscribe write-up and many branching links thereof. Only because I started it LAST night... I... had stuff to DO, dammit. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

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iamnotyourmuse, 2013-03-09 05:24 am UTC

	I want to dive through the wank like a porpoise, and burrow through it like a gopher dorothy1901 2013-03-08 04:41 pm UTC (link)
	From the first Journalfen wank: Were you all raised by hyenas? Yes, and hyenas have the BEST time! (Reply to this)

	queencallipygos 2013-03-08 04:56 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, man, why is it only just NOW that I remember "oh, yeah, the Cassie Edwards black ferret plagarism thing"? That made it onto Wait Wait Don't Tell Me and I got to impress my then-boyfriend by knowing the answer! (Reply to this)(Thread)

	rosehiptea 2013-03-09 09:54 am UTC (link)
	If I remember correctly I impressed my ex-husband the same way. Except he was already my ex-husband at the time. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	redcoast 2013-03-08 06:09 pm UTC (link)
	Imagine my surprise when I learned that the anus does self-lubricate. (Reply to this)

xturtle
2013-03-08 09:27 pm UTC (link)

I just linked all my RL friends to "The Life and Death of Jesse James" after the Manti Teo thing broke. I struggled, but did not mention Dan Fogelberg's llamas. It's hard enough to explain online fandom, harder still when FW is pretty much your fandom.

Also, I think of KittenMommy every time Sherlock signs a text in the BBC series. I can't even begin to explore the depths of my own nerdery.

(Reply to this)

guera
2013-03-09 12:01 am UTC (link)

I just spent the afternoon digging through the thanfiction wank and remembering. I had somehow completely forgotten about the sparrow thing. I had remembered that he had said he had a son (and since he was on my Flist before the crazy hit the fan I had remembered all the sad posts about how he couldn't see his son) but I guess I just thought he made it up whole cloth.

Bah, it still pisses me off, cause I bought a cute bag from one the 'inner circle' and never got it. I mean, yeah, a lot of people got suckered for more than $10 but still.

I also got an PM a year ago (I don't get many, and I'm too lazy to delete them so it's still there) about how they were compiling all the DAYD shit and putting it on a new website...but I haven't heard anything about that since...I guess he made it past the 6 week mark.

I'm thinking the winner is a toss up between thanfiction and Msscribe

(Reply to this)

	bookshop 2013-03-09 12:14 am UTC (link)
	Happy birthday, FW! <3 Have a present! http://www.dailydot.com/society/fandomwank-journalfen-fan-drama-news-anniversary/ (Reply to this)(Thread)

	bienegold 2013-03-09 12:46 am UTC (link)
	"Happy birthday! Enjoy your death!" (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

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anarchicq, 2013-03-09 07:22 am UTC

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bookshop, 2013-03-09 06:40 pm UTC

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ekaterinv, 2013-03-09 07:33 am UTC

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sepiamagpie, 2013-03-09 08:16 am UTC

	puipui 2013-03-09 01:22 am UTC (link)
	I love how you keep doing these reporter-type posts about fandom as if you want to be a real journalist someday when you grow up, and yet you never mention your deep personal involvement in or history with the things you're writing about, ever. That is the pinnacle of journalist integrity, right there. Go you! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

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white_serpent, 2013-03-09 02:19 am UTC

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puipui, 2013-03-09 08:21 am UTC

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bookshop, 2013-03-09 06:38 pm UTC

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puipui, 2013-03-10 02:00 am UTC

^ -

llama_treats, 2013-03-10 05:15 am UTC

	snacky 2013-03-09 03:36 am UTC (link)
	Thank you, Aja! <3 (Reply to this)(Parent)

	I've signed in for the first time in years. im_nucking_futs 2013-03-09 03:08 am UTC (link)
	Just to take a part in this. Yay! (Reply to this)

	gerorin 2013-03-09 03:28 am UTC (link)
	I was about to comment here with... something yesterday. But I got stuck in the Mitchell Clan wank and haven't been able to get out. I am now trying to find that one person that made a compilation of David Mitchel's best moments. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	gerorin 2013-03-09 04:59 am UTC (link)
	Also- is the typo intentional? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

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snacky, 2013-03-09 02:05 pm UTC

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gerorin, 2013-03-09 02:58 pm UTC

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snacky, 2013-03-09 03:07 pm UTC

	spawn_of_kong 2013-03-09 03:34 am UTC (link)
	Wait, Cleo has her own wiki? (Reply to this)(Thread)

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queencallipygos, 2013-03-09 06:13 am UTC

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cleolinda, 2013-03-13 12:53 am UTC

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cleolinda, 2013-03-13 12:52 am UTC

	cyndra_falin 2013-03-09 03:42 am UTC (link)
	Good thing I sleep for most of the day! With all the reading to do, I'm not gonna sleep tonight. (Went in for a Upper Endoscopy this morning, came home and slept the rest of the happy knock out meds away wheee) (Reply to this)

	lil_miss_stfu 2013-03-09 09:59 am UTC (link)
	Y'know, I've gotta say, upon re-reading the Msscribe wank... I'm a little embarrassed at how oblivious I was to all of this given I had her friended for a decent amount of the latter portion. I think it was Charitywank that made me de-friend her, but I honestly can't remember given that the 'joule' mentioned in there isn't in existence any longer. (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

lil_miss_stfu, 2013-03-09 10:08 am UTC

jira
2013-03-09 10:38 am UTC (link)

Ugh. I was hoping that wank involving me wouldn't come up because wow was I a grade A asshole who was acting really fucking racist and shitty and I was hoping it would be forgotten but I am glad I grew up and learned from my mistakes and stopped being a fucking shitface over that, and also man while I still want to support my friends as much as possible, looking back, I am pretty sure everything I thought about Hellfire was completely wrong. And basically ugh wow I'm just going to go back in time and punch myself in the face approximately 100000000 times.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

sepiamagpie, 2013-03-09 08:58 pm UTC

	beachlass 2013-03-09 04:01 pm UTC (link)
	I just need to say that is it actually my birthday this weekend, and I'm stuck at home with laryngitis - so THANK YOU. (Reply to this)

	seldomnaughty 2013-03-09 06:18 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, man. Domlijahgate! Crystalwank! At this point in my life I'm like the Opera Ghost of lurkers, but I will come right back out for this trip down wanky memory lane. (Reply to this)

	coffee_mug 2013-03-09 06:24 pm UTC (link)
	The LOTRiPS makes me nostalgic, not just for the wank but the fun parts of that fandom as well. Does the Hobbit fandom have RPS? (Reply to this)(Thread)

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yndigot, 2013-03-10 01:52 am UTC

	thoms 2013-03-10 10:23 pm UTC (link)
	Wow, 10 years! I just got lost in the BJR Outwalks a Hurricane wank and it's been two hours and oh my god. (Reply to this)

	ickle_snowflake 2013-03-12 02:34 am UTC (link)
	That time kittenmommy lost her everloving shit over the lobster!fists meme suddenly makes a little more sense. (Reply to this)

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