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insignificant other (snacky) wrote in fandom_wank,
@ 2013-03-10 10:12:00

Entry tags:

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, first round, part 2
Congratulations to Bartending in the dark, His wife? A horse, Dumbledore is gay, and God's Magical Pubic Hairs - they all move forward to the next round. No real surprises there, except for God's Magical Pubic Hairs - I wasn't sure that could beat Usagi Kou, but it triumphed in the end.

Are you ready for the next round? Links to the wanks are found here, if you need a refresher.

Poll #592
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

FPB
73 (26.1%)

Anne Rice (interrogating the text from the wrong perspective)
207 (73.9%)

You choose:

Clan Mitchell
103 (36.9%)

My ponies hate you now
176 (63.1%)

You choose:

Strikethrough 2: Electric Boogaloo (in which Aja yells "Fire!")
176 (64.5%)

Inner Circle Wank (in which Aja is the twattiest twat in twatsville)
97 (35.5%)

You choose:

Crystalwank
241 (86.7%)

Dan Fogelberg's llamas
37 (13.3%)

Ready? VOTE.

ETA: Polls are closed as of 3/11/13, 9:15 a.m. EST. You can vote after that, but it won't count.

(Post a new comment)

	iamnotyourmuse 2013-03-10 04:27 pm UTC (link)
	I had to go with the ponies. I had to. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	feenix 2013-03-10 11:21 pm UTC (link)
	I think we all did. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	anatsuno 2013-03-10 05:16 pm UTC (link)
	FPB versus Anne Rice is downright cruel D: (Reply to this)(Thread)

queencallipygos, 2013-03-10 05:49 pm UTC

franzen, 2013-03-10 08:58 pm UTC

tunxeh, 2013-03-11 01:57 am UTC

tunxeh, 2013-03-10 10:39 pm UTC

feenix, 2013-03-10 11:23 pm UTC

sepiamagpie, 2013-03-10 11:55 pm UTC

tez, 2013-03-11 12:17 am UTC

kumquat_of_doom, 2013-03-11 01:23 am UTC

Where me and FPB do not make friends -

sepiamagpie, 2013-03-11 07:34 am UTC

Re: Where me and FPB do not make friends -

tez, 2013-03-11 10:56 am UTC

	tez 2013-03-10 05:41 pm UTC (link)
	The pressing question is... ...how could you not vote for Crystalwank? (Reply to this)(Thread)

anarchicq, 2013-03-10 09:46 pm UTC

tez, 2013-03-10 11:20 pm UTC

cmdr_zoom, 2013-03-11 03:20 am UTC

tez, 2013-03-11 04:23 am UTC

puipui, 2013-03-11 05:55 am UTC

gerorin, 2013-03-11 07:24 am UTC

itcamefromjapan, 2013-03-11 07:32 am UTC

tez, 2013-03-11 07:34 am UTC

sandglass, 2013-03-11 02:05 am UTC

tez, 2013-03-11 08:44 am UTC

kita0610, 2013-03-11 03:54 am UTC

tez, 2013-03-11 08:50 am UTC

kita0610, 2013-03-11 09:32 am UTC

tehrin, 2013-03-11 09:01 am UTC

	queencallipygos 2013-03-10 05:50 pm UTC (link)
	Actually, that's a good question - how were the matchups chosen? Was it random, or via some algorithm/theory or what? (Reply to this)(Thread)

lady7jane, 2013-03-10 05:58 pm UTC

hopsandbarley, 2013-03-10 10:14 pm UTC

lady7jane, 2013-03-11 04:57 am UTC

snacky, 2013-03-10 07:15 pm UTC

snacky, 2013-03-10 07:21 pm UTC

	schrodingerscat 2013-03-10 06:36 pm UTC (link)
	Aja vs Aja? So hard to choose (Reply to this)(Thread)

phosfate, 2013-03-10 08:21 pm UTC

schrodingerscat, 2013-03-10 08:31 pm UTC

franzen, 2013-03-11 03:02 am UTC

	guera 2013-03-10 06:38 pm UTC (link)
	Ack, these are harder to choose between than yesterday's... (Reply to this)

	sgaana 2013-03-10 07:31 pm UTC (link)
	These are some particularly cruel choices. (Reply to this)

	risha 2013-03-10 07:40 pm UTC (link)
	I eventually voted for what I thought was the most classic wanks, not the ones I actually enjoyed the most. Damn my ethics. (Reply to this)

	puipui 2013-03-10 07:56 pm UTC (link)
	FPB vs. Anne Rice? Ponies vs. Clan Mitchell? AJA VS. AJA? The choices today seem particularly cruel. ;_; Poor Dan Fogelberg's llamas, though. I love them, but they're really no match for Crystalwank, the wank that ate everything. They're going down with the littlest armadillo, I think. (Reply to this)

	rogueunit 2013-03-10 08:04 pm UTC (link)
	But but... llamas! (Reply to this)(Thread)

spacelogic, 2013-03-10 09:24 pm UTC

	franzen 2013-03-10 08:56 pm UTC (link)
	It's so wonderful to remember that once there was FUNNY pony wank, as opposed to Brony wank, which inevitably begins with "NO." (Reply to this)

puipui
2013-03-10 09:27 pm UTC (link)

Okay, I know that FPB is probably going to lose, but I was going through old wanks before voting, and I found this line in a wank with regards to FPB:

ataniell93 tosses her in two cents, and adds the only bit of common sense in the post

Anyone that makes Ataniell look sane and sensible by comparison has to get my vote, even if he doesn't write Jesus fanfic (to the best of my knowledge). Because wow.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

tez, 2013-03-10 11:17 pm UTC

franzen, 2013-03-11 02:43 am UTC

	hopsandbarley 2013-03-10 10:15 pm UTC (link)
	Man, those llamas don't stand a chance. A shame... And pitting the ponies against Clan Mitchell was just cruel. Those are two of my personal favorites! (Reply to this)

	amaresu 2013-03-10 10:25 pm UTC (link)
	You made me choose between ponies and Clan Mitchell! That was evil. But I got a kudos notification the other day so I had to go with Clan Mitchell. (Reply to this)(Thread)

squeakytoy, 2013-03-10 11:27 pm UTC

amaresu, 2013-03-11 12:31 am UTC

squeakytoy, 2013-03-11 12:38 am UTC

franzen, 2013-03-11 03:00 am UTC

cmdr_zoom, 2013-03-11 03:15 am UTC

beachlass
2013-03-10 11:12 pm UTC (link)

LLAMAS.

I had to go with Crystalwank, but I might have to put the llamas on my desktop for a week or so.

And I went with the shirt burning, despite this gem of commentary from the inner circle wank:

I envision them as the terrified denizens of a small Carpathian village, hanging their houses with crucifixes and scrawling "OMG I DO NOT KNOW ANY OF YOU PEOPLE I CAN'T HEAR YOU LALALA" on their doors in blood in the hopes of warding off the Thing That Wanks In The Night; waking suddenly in the darkness and waiting, waiting for the gathering mist and the stink from the charnel-house, for hollow footsteps to stop outside their door and a stealthy hand to try their doorknob before with a slamming crack like a falling tree the wood of the door bows inward under the weight of a tidal wave of spooge... -

mirabellawotr describing HP fandom

(Reply to this)

	the_sun_is_up 2013-03-10 11:12 pm UTC (link)
	Those poor llamas never stood a chance. (Reply to this)

	schroduck 2013-03-10 11:16 pm UTC (link)
	After years of lurking, the opportunity to vote in these polls have finally persuaded me to bite the bullet and buy an account. Finally, I can give "My Ponies Hate You" the love(?) it deserves. (Reply to this)

	miraba 2013-03-11 02:49 am UTC (link)
	I can't see Crystalwank not making it to the end. (Reply to this)

	justjenn 2013-03-11 03:28 am UTC (link)
	Won't someone think of the llamas? (Reply to this)

	mmanurere 2013-03-11 06:36 am UTC (link)
	Crystalwank may have been epic, but "Dan Fogelberg's llamas" is just one of the most brilliantly random phrases in the history of ever. (Reply to this)

	itcamefromjapan 2013-03-11 07:35 am UTC (link)
	I went with the ponies in the end, but it was really, really hard not to vote for Clan Mitchell. (Reply to this)

	metropolis22786 2013-03-11 09:01 am UTC (link)
	Hi, long-time lurker here, but (Gods help me) I read thought the qualifiers here..... Aja yelling "Fire!" vs. Aja being "the twattiest twat in twatsville"? Surely Aja gets through no matter what. Is this in the spirit of things? (Reply to this)(Thread)

ladyvyola, 2013-03-11 07:43 pm UTC

	tehrin 2013-03-11 09:10 am UTC (link)
	Damn. I miss yesterday and Usagi Kou lost. :( (Reply to this)

	tinybubbles 2013-03-14 03:55 am UTC (link)
	Oh wow, it's been ages since Crystalwank. I had to go back and re-read it. She really deserves to be in the finals. (Reply to this)

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