Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

12:08am: Claywank!
You know, there are a plethora of Clay Aiken communities on LJ. But I must say that I find aiken4clay the most wanktastic of them all. If anything, this post proves it:

"I went to Good Morning America at 1am and was the first person there, though it sucked cause they let a lot of people who weren't Clay fans in because they had reservations, and they took up most of the audience, luckily I was at the beginning of the stand by line."

and

"I almost died, he looked up at my pink antennas, that I had stuck paper to that said I heart Claiken, and then looked back into my eyes again like I was crazy for having his name on my head lol
Then the girl in front of me took a picture with him so I asked him if I could take one also and he said yes and put his arm out."

(Gotta love run-on sentences. Well, except I don't.)

12:44am: U Make LiveJournal Suck!
So, upon the advice of my Evil Overlord, lulinda, I came upon this gem of a community on LiveJournal, that, incidently, Undone is a member of:

U_Make_LJ_Suck

So much wank.

Uber Wank.

But props for more Hetero!CatBoy musings.

And look who it is!

Supa Dupa Anime wank!

1:02am: it should be our motto


found in this post in u_make_lj_suck.

1:07am: Three words.
Get over it.

Though I wish I could think of a better way to waste my first post than on American Idol wackiness.

2:48am: Yes, MORE DomLijah True Believer wank! Because it never gets old!
(Yes, newbie already found something, whee!)

And to think, I'm not even a fan of RPS/RPF.

Anyway, while catching up on my Friends list on LJ, I see that the ass-kickin' ninja that is percy_weatherby has posted a rant on the LJ he and his friend share for this purpose. In the article, we are linked to this little gem, in which one of the DomLijah True Believers rants (yet AGAIN) about how "persecuted" they are by us F_Wer types:

http://www.livejournal.com/users/undone27/352009.html

Already it's got a sizable number of replies. Post your favorite quotes!


Personal favorite from the OP: Oh, and hello to those of you that are reading this post from one of the above sites, because I know it will be either directly linked or copy/pasted and cross-posted within the hour.

All too happy to oblige, m'dear! *salutes*

12:53pm: Fanfiction wank
Hey. I've been lurking here for a long time, since the Livejournal days, but this is my first post. I bring you a wank that has it all-- outraged moral criticisms, 12-year-olds with bad grammar, overdramatic fanfiction authors and more. It's on a members-only (but open-membership) mailing list, but I'll do my best to reproduce it here.

( Read more... )

4:45pm: Sweet-smelling Wank!
Ah, for once a post that doesn't reek with the stench of ripe wank. No, no. This one offers up its What-The-Shit in All New Minty Freshness.

Buffy soap baskets for sale - with a musical episode theme!

Buffy's Make Me Feel I'm Alive bubble gum lip balm
Spike's Rest In Peace spiced oatmeal soap
Dawn's I Stole This peach soap
Tara's I'm Cured I Want the Boys lemon lotion

What? No Joss Whedon's Like Jesus, In A Way loofahs?

5:50pm: Hello, Buffy badfic wank!
Aurora Derall here again, and reporting for yet another fandom I'm not into! Anyway:

I always knew there was a good reason to hang around the Mary Sue Report community. However, while it was the place where I got this scoop, this story ain't really about them.

See, today was just like any ol' day - we had one of the average posts mocking an MS writer's hissyfit. Everyone was having their usual fun poking holes at the person's argument, when ginmar decides to join in by sharing an even BETTER fit thrown by a Buffyfic writer. To give you an idea of who we're dealing with, I quote the summary ginmar so thoughtfully provided:

"Oh, God, where do I start? She writes rapefic where the character likes it, and where the rape is presented as justified punishment. Then she refers to it as 'naughty.' She encourages some really scary people to write really misogynistic fic, and she's part of the Babyverse---where some white-trash trailer park creature has taken the part of Buffy, and any old character from any old fandom becomes the writers' sex toys. The Baby character is a blatant self-insert. The writer was utterly bewildered when confronted with the fact that two men sexually fondling and then penetrating a drugged woman was rape. Oh, and she's not a teenybopper, either."

Now, this isn't particularly wanky in and of itself. It's a concept that is rife with badfic, but it's not wank. To quote the OP's reaction at being shown this: "Sordid sex can be damned funny but if you're going to do something controversial do it well and be prepared to stand your ground with an intelligent argument behind it.

However (because there's always a "however" in these things), this is where the wank comes in: Because the "No Cookie For You: Bad Buffy Fic" group dared to point and laugh at this particular author, the author retaliates by taking down her fics and posting a notice (as a fic) of why she took them down. And the beauty of the wank spills into the reviews, too!

ginmar also tells us: "She's threatening now to put her fics back up, now that she's gotten attention and petting and so on." All I can say is: Joy?


Thank you again for pointing this out to others, ginmar!



Edit: ( ginmar shares some more about Ditto with us )


I have to say, I don't think I ever saw the term "peeps" used THAT many times in ONE paragraph in my entire life, not even by the "teeniest" of teenyboppers.


Edit 2: ( And here's a little more! )

11:57pm: There are no words for the amusment of fundie wank.
What do you get when you add fundamentalist Bible thumpers and a semi-religious Jim Carrey movie and mix at a movie board?

Wank, and in large amount.

Bible DOES NOT tell women to marry their rapist (Um, no shit, sherlock.)

( A few choice excerpts... )

Then it delves into homosexuality, premarital sex, how people would rather go to hell than be bored in heaven, some weird-ass snakes in grave thing and so on... *Boggle*

And the beat wank goes on...

(Edited to add some choice posts...)