Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

4:01pm: Even in the best of times, theforce.net will wank.
Yesterday at Comic-Con, Lucasfilm announced the title of Episode III would be Revenge of the Sith, a fairly predictable title that sent most of the fandom spiraling into ecstacy.

But of course, this is Star Wars fandom - the wank is inevitable. This isn't as hardcore as some previous TFN stuff, but it's amusing enough for a Sunday afternoon.

Note: These links are to the SPOILERS forum, but I don't see any really intensive spoilers in this thread. Still, exercise caution.

Darth_Jaxon, Chief Wanker: I'd like to say thank you to Lucas for totally caving to every 15 year old fanboy's wet dream by giving EP III the worst title ever. How boring and predictable.

Most people won't even know who the Sith are why they want revenge. Sure everyone on this board does because you are all Star Wars fans. However, I can guarentee that 95% of the people out there who have seen TPM & AOTC only once or twice aren't going to have any idea. Now Lucas is going to have to take up needless time in this movie explaining away this title.

And on it goes. Good ol' TFN!

Also check out babymouseinzehaus's hilarious "It's a hoax!" and the ramblings of SONOFJANGO on page 21.

6:05pm: Not even good enough for Sparklypoo.
Sorting Community Wank, and it doesn't have anything to do with being Sorted. I never thought I'd see the day.

That's right, the trolls are baiting the HP fandom again. Shame it's so easy.

( it makes my day to see all you losers obsess over a stupid movie. )

6:13pm: Don't You Have Any Personalities That Aren't Complete Asshats?
People, this is the craziest thing I've ever seen. And yes, I'm counting the woman who went into labor becuase of a Clay Aiken wank, the people who got their nemeses fired over their Harry Potter porn, Victoria Bitter, and CrystalGamgee. This is a whole new level. Of what I don't know!

Some of y'all may remember some time ago there was a minor kerfuffle in the Smallville fandom about a fan who delusionally earnestly proposed to Tom Welling at a fan convention in late March 2004, which seemed to freak him out and send him scurrying out of the room. The SV fandom was pissed in general, because Tom W. never does fan conventions, and that one had been going very well until the weirdness from this girl. The people who were there, including Kryptonsite moderator Tigress35 said that this was not said in a flirty way, but in the same earnest wide-eyed way that the woman at a Trek convention asked Spock Leonard Nimoy what it was like to lose a son. So, yes, creepy.

This girl was, at the time, posting on Kryptonsite as TomWellingLuvsMe.

When banning the Lex Mafia from Kryptonsite yesterday, something caught my eye - some of their IP addresses were identical. One thing led to another, and after two days of comparing posting logs with LexsBitch67 (who talks about her discovery here, where we all kissed and made up), analyzing IP traceroutes, database logs, posting patterns, posting/arguing styles, and IP addresses from 4 different LJs as well as both Kryptonsite and the LexMafia message board, we've discovered that this person has at least fifteen, and possibly as many as 28 personalities (we discovered seven more today) in the Smallville fandom alone. She's also said she's involved the BtVS, Angel and Stargate SG-1 fandoms, y'all, so this is kind of a heads up.

( Have you seen this wanker? )

We've figured out that once she realized that Tom Welling does not, in fact, luv her, she became an insant vitriolic anti-Clark pro-Lex fan. All her personalities pre-May (when she was outed as the crazed fan) were pro-Clark. All her personalities post-May are Clark-hating Lex fans. Once the Ksite mods backed up criticism of this kind of treatment of the show's actors, and several mods snarked on her and the fandom declared her a pariah, she decided to wage war.

Specifically, this war.

Yep! That Lex Mafia wank? Is made up of at least 2/3 of her personalities. The other people just believed the varied and sundry personas' claims to persecution against Lex fans by the Ksite mods. This person's spent at least a year lying to people, and has spent the last few months deliberately trying to cause a fandom-wide rift.

It was one person doing her best to piss off UltimateMother, who must have seemed the easiest target at Ksite, not being a site admin and not having the power to ban anyone, and being nice and all. And doing it all under 20 different screennames. The vent UM posted came after months of consistent harassment from this person under at least a dozen different screennames because of her anti-Clark vitriol in the Clark forums. According to our log files, she created at least one new persona every other week between September 2003 and May 2004. She also wreaked major havoc in the Whitney forums. In one thread, one of her personalities (getawaysame) told us she hated the character because her brother had been killed by a hazing incident. She was then offered condolences by another of her personalities (colilan) and then a third personality (Lionel's Son) berated the other posters for not having reacted sensitively enough to the tragedy. Does anyone at this point even believe she has a brother? GAH!!!

No wonder we kept getting pissed off at these people. They were all the same people!

( The sordid details here. Because it's all about the sordid details. )

In other words, we all got played against each other. We at Kryptonsite are agog, but mostly we feel really bad for the LexMafia girls. They invested tons of energy into defending this person in her various guises on the boards, believing that they were truly being picked on. After all, if ten people have the same problem with the same person, you can't just write it off as a personality conflict. What's more, they thought these personas were their friends, in real crises, real depressions, and it was all just a big hoax to use them to start a fandom-wide flamewar. Their best intentions were used against them, and our desire to keep the boards safe from hackers was used against us.

It almost worked, too. It was only the off chance of banning IP addresses back when I thought it was a big group of women trying to sabotage the boards that I caught this, and mentioned it to Lexsbitch67, and it all just came togeher there.

Twenty identities, dozens of people hurt and harassed, and at least two message forums embroiled in a flame war...

And it's just because of one girl's bruised ego.

ETA: I've now been contacted by three different Buffy/Angel forums saying this all sounds painfully familiar, and they'd like to compare notes. *is frightened now*

I don't even know WHAT to think.

UPDATE: frelling_tralk shares the "Lex Mafia" side of the story and the extents to which SockQueen lied to them and used their good intentions in this post.

9:53pm: You know you've been reading too much fandom_wank when you pass a car with a "VB" sticker on the bumper, and your first thought is not "Virginia Beach," but "Victoria Bitter."