Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

10:50am: And ALL of this happens because of an alternate pairing fic?!
Small wank, but still amusing. *pets it*

In the Gundam SEED fandom, the most popular slash pairing is Kira Yamato/Athrun Zala. While I preferKira with Athrun's ex-girlfriend Lacus Clyne and Athrun with his numer 1 fangirl and Lacus impersonator Meer Campbell local bridge bunny Meyrin Hawke, i, I have nothing against K/A, and have even enjoyed some fics featuring them. In the end, to each their own, I suppose.

But go and tell something so simple to the Wanky Ones who have reviewed a particular K/A fic at the Pit of Voles.

Between all of the canon slaves (don't put us canon likers to shame) and the rabid yaoi fangirls, I'm out of there. I want my Gundam SEED fandom to be quiet and nice, thank you.

1:42pm: There IS NOTHING KINKY about Snape/Harry! Uh. Wha?
There's this really great little community on LJ called ship_manifesto whose sole purpose is for writers to post essays talking about why they 'ship specific pairings. No shipping wars are allowed, though concrit on the various essays is allowed. Everything's gone hunky dory for a long while and I've learned all about various fandoms and pairings through it. [/shameless plug for friend's nifty comm.]

Anyway, tigress35 posted this Snape/Harry 'ship manifesto, in which she details why this pairing hits her Teacher/Student and sub/dom kinks for her. The essays here, you'll recall, are supposed to be about why writers *personally* 'ship the pairings, not about why the pairing should be your OTP, too.

( A brief excerpt from the essay... )

Anyway, some people are really into her essay, and some people make polite your kink is not my kink but that's OK! kinds of posts.

kelex also (at first) politely disagrees that her story was about Teacher/Student/abuse kink at all, but Tigress admits that it hit her kink anyway, whether the writers intended it to or not, what with artistic intent being different than artistic effectiveness and all. Also, she doesn't think Kelex is being all that polite. It kind of disintegrates and mushrooms from there, and comments are turned off for a couple of hours by the mods to allow everyone to cool off, but opened back up the same day.

The post then immediately becomes a magnet for irrationally angry/distraught people, with:

1. alchemia stating how very very sad this post made her (*woe!) and went on to post in her own LJ how personally offended she is that no one can respond to her brilliant LJ comment for four whole hours.

2. People who are offended that their story was recced as a kink fic and helpfully provide their own preferred lingo (it's a "forced bondage" story, dammit, not a PWP!!)

3. In the "Everyone's a damned critic" category is anais_rhys, who trolls that forget the shipping debate - your story summarizing pains meeeeee!

4. The one lone voice of reason wondering can't we all just get along?

Silly girl. Of course not. This is the Harry Potter fandom we're talking about.

ETA: ladysorka has helpfully provided a link to her own wanking, in which she is very, very ashamed that she gets off on is involved with this pairing, when other people get off on are into it for reasons she poopoos. I am dying. From the laughter.

6:24pm: To quote rhiannonhero from LJ: "Anne Rice wouldn't last a day in fandom, yo."
Apparently Anne Rice is upset about some of the reviewers at amazon.com for they have strained her Dickensean principles to the max!

(Scroll about halfway down. You are looking for reviewer "Anne Obrien Rice" and a paragraph that never ends.)

ETA: You will now have to click on "Next" under the customer reviews to locate the "Anne Obrien Rice" review. Just click and scroll down. It's hard to miss.

Also, iconage has happened at fwank_icons.

Son of ETA: Amazon.com seems to have deleted the Anne Obrien Rice review (and the crop of reviews that came after it). Fortunately, some things which are posted on the internet have a way of ( being preserved forever. )

10:11pm: A Wank by any other name would be as mockable
First wank, so I'm keeping it small. Well, it kept itself small, but I still think it's a little wanky. And it's Star Wars, so just be greatful it's not relating to any changes GL might have made recently.

So, once upon a time (no Galaxy Far Far Away jokes here, thank you very much) there was a parody fanfiction at SW.com written by a bunch of fans, who nicknamed themselves the Psychopathic Jedi and appropriated one Psycho's forums for personal use. Pretty much all the regulars are Psychos, since newbies tend to get lost in the injokes. Newbie tends to be a slightly offensive term around there.

Two of the psychos, Princess and Chozen, have a bit of a history, that I think began with a political falling out and has always tended to devolve threads into bickering. Princess is an admin, which doesn't help. Actually, a lot of people involved in this are admins or mods. Except Chozen...

Most of the psycho's have this tendency to change names. A lot. There's a 23 page thread to evidence this. You'll notice that the bio I linked for Chozen isn't under that sn. No, it's under 'Jesus'.

And that's where the wank began. Chozen (at the beginning of this, going by 'Bob') asks to have his name changed to Jesus (about half way down the page). Princess denies it. So he asks someone else to do it. On the next page people start taking sides, though a lot of peolpe also start taking hte piss.

( So Chozen tries to 'justify' the name )

Aurelius, another mod, changes the name. Bad Furday takes his side. Drake threatens formal complaints, which ironic since two of the three admins have already apparently weighed in on the issue anyway. And he's a mod.

The mood begins to swing back to normal, with everyone teasing and mocking each other. Until TSL weighs in with:

You know what's funny? If he'd come up with a name that offended other "groups" it wouldn't be allowed, but offending Christians is always ok. Why is that?

So GI decides to stir the shit a bit more with:

In the US you can have an only black awards, only latino awards, but if its only whites then its racist...always reverse discrimination

What's the law that compares something to being racist? Pretty certain it's being broken here.

It all reaches it's final page having decended back into wank again. Chozen still thinks his name is funny and mocks people who might be offended by it, GI suddenly seems to switch sides and explains to him why people might be offended (basically outlining why Chozen's doing it).

( In which Jesus, nee Chozen, continues to piss people off and has a poor idea of flaming )

And then the site's owner locks the thread, sharpish. He would be the final missing admin Drake wanted to complain to. It ends in the forum feedback thread, with people complaining about no more name changes and Chozen offering to let Beeurd change his name back.

I admit had my own small part to play... although mainly due down to this site's reactions (side a few), so it's not fair if I complain..

note... this offer only goes out to beeurd... and the other webmaster... buy one get one free... yeah..

sorry to ruin your fun.. it’s all my fault… I don’t deserve to live… I hate myself.



So, is that wanky enough? Or must I lube up again and go and search for wankier pastures.