Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

7:56am: Don't shoot Bambi!
Aussies are angry, yes we are. Or so all our major media outlets are telling us.

Over the last few days the news agencies have been going fast and furious with the Delta dumping scandal.

Delta Goodrem, Aussie actress, singer and all out 'national sweetheart' has been dumped by her boyfriend tennis player Mark Philippoussis for Paris Hilton (who does not require any introduction).

I've seen a bit of wank on LJ, but the best has come from the media, last night Channel 7 tracked down Mark's mother who refused to say anything bad about her son, fellow Aussies, wasn't that just a classy example of intrepid reporting?

Treating Delta Goodrem caddishly - if that is what Philippoussis has done - is emerging as a crime on a par with shooting Bambi.

Hi Delta, it's over, I'm off to Paris

The only leading character saying anything publicly is Paris Hilton, the 23-year-old heiress infamous as the star of a porn home movie.


Hilton reportedly declared over the weekend: "I've got a new man … he's so hot. His name is Mark Philippoussis."

a story about the golden girl of pop betrayed by the handsome but broody Philippoussis, who had fallen victim to the mesmerising charms of the bleached and perma-tanned Wicked Witch of West Hollywood, Paris Hilton.

One indignant fan writing on Delta's website wondered how Philippoussis could possibly trade a "sweet, beautiful caring girl" for a "silly rich bimbo who isn't exactly the brightest crayon in the box".

Ah, it's so sweet for them to report the wank online, I don't have to go look (because I'm lazy), but the news was better yesterday.

10:24am: It starts when someone makes a typical post bitching about an RPer over on Furcadia.rann makes an offhanded command about Furcadia sucking,youlanda steps up to DEFEND ITS HONOR!!11, splooge flies.

And it continues when another Furcadia player makes a another post defending Furcadia. This one hasn't gotten as bad as the first one yet, but it's well on the way.

Just another happy day over on bad_rpers_suck!

2:00pm: Wank that's RIPPED FROM THE HEADLINES!
The New York Times covers the wankbeat with a story about online fans' reaction to Law and Order: Criminal Intent's choose-your-own-ending episode. See: casual fans vs. real fans! Dumbing down! and What would the characters do?

( Cut and paste, for those not NYT registered. )

2:52pm: " No, I have nothing against feminists, but...."
Over at Bad RPers Suck, saber_0rlando asks Why does nobody want to RP medieval women who stay at home all day and cook?

"Does nobody want to stay true to canon and stay in her place and cook? Yes, there were exceptions to every rule, but in general, back then "feminism" as such barely existed. The average woman in the Middle Ages - even if she were noble - was a wife, mother, housekeeper, and had no rights or self-esteem, nor did it occur to her that things could be or should be different. At best, she was just she sat around and looked pretty and was objectified. I am not saying that that's the way it should be. That's how it was."

Most people reply saying something along the lines of "It's boring." But the winner is rann, who seems to think that the OP is wrong.

"Sounds exciting to me! I'll just have my character be at the cookfire, I'll make sure to pose it whenever I stir the pot, add some herbs, or stoke the fire!
BABY CAN YOU HANDLE THE INTENSITY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"

Wank-o-rama.

3:06pm: Sugarquill wank, Part II
In the wake of this kerfuffle, zsenya is angry with narcissam and decides to take revenge.

Soon after narcissam posts about it on her journal, the SQ forums are suddenly disabled.

(Edited to fix the links)

7:15pm: Scandal!
So. seris posts in bad_rpers_suck his disturbed reaction to the_real_squall, who is, basically, a troll.

All is well until kerikeri points out that they're the same person. (Wank within wank! Oh my!)

Seris attempts to defenend his-or-her-self, but the heroic link is, sadly, dead.

*edit*

The troll stops in to say hi.