Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

2:50am: Oh noes!1! You insulted my favourite movie! I keel you now!1!
Okay. So. Kben makes a post about "classic" movies, in which she states: I’ve come to the conclusion that Citizen Kane is boring, Apocalypse Now is too damn long (and this was BEFORE the redux), and The Godfather is the most pretentious answer to “What’s your favorite movie?” I’ve ever heard.

And that is where our drama begins. There are numerous comments from various people, some politely disagreeing with her, others downright angry. Later on, Kben attempts to explain herself.

Lots of drama and big words thrown about. All-around, it's a wank that's fun for the whole family, though a bit small.

6:38am: Wank at the Hilton
Someone's posted Paris Hilton's love letters to Nick Carter on Oh NO They Didn't! The letters themselves are meh, like Hilton herself, but the wank that ensues when Hilton's intelligence is impuned. *snerk*

A sample:

Oh, ok, so you don't base your image of her off of the media and you know her personally?

no... OMG! YOU'RE RIGHT! THERE'S BEEN AN ALL-OUT MEDIA ASSAULT ON PARIS TO PORTRAY HER AS A STUPID CUNT! I FEEL SO BAD! HOW COULD I HAVE FALLEN FOR THIS??!! I BET THEY HOLD HER AT GUNPOINT AND MAKE HER SAY THE INANE THINGS SHE COMES OUT WITH IN INTERVIEWS!! HOW DO WE STOP THIS??!! SAVE PARIS!!! PARIS + MENSA 4 EVZ!!

"OMG, Paris' image is a vast media conspiracy! The media makes sluts look stupid!1!"

7:56am: Miller Movie Music Miniwank
The wank is pretty much over, but I think it deserves a mention for sheer asshattery.

On the IMDB (what, is anyone surprised?) movie database for Frank Miller's "Sin City," someone innocently asks what that catchy music in the trailer is.

Cue pretentious music-lovers who wank all over the OP for not being hip enough to know what the song is.

The stupid lasts until a kind voice of reason finally answers.

ETA Not only can the IMDB posters not answer a simple, politely phrased question, they also couldn't spot a joke if it had Tongue In Cheek painted on it in red letters and then bit them on the ass.

1:30pm: More Yaoi!Wank From Fanficrants
Straightforward "IF U DUN LIEK YAOI U MUST B A H8R!!!" wank. Homophobic name-calling and Godwin's Law invoked within the first three lines. Enjoy.

3:30pm: Over in the Horror Movies community on LJ,raziel123 posts a pic of herself dressed up as a character from one of her fave movies. Comments start off rather well, until a few outraged posters start complaining about people posting pictures of themselves dressed up as horror movie characters (it seems this isn't the first post someone has made with them dressed up). Because, you know, the community is about the horror MOVIES, not the fans obsessions with them and their characters.**snerk**

5:07pm: “JennyO, she's like really boring MadLibs, in a way.”
Y'all might remember jennyo from her rant about how an anonymous lust thread highlighted fandom's "feminism problem, especially seen in a 'certain set of boyslashers,' who put out work with 'clearly anti-woman attitudes.'" Well, she's switched the same old argument to a new forum: Veronica Mars.

annakovsky writes an articulate post explaining why she doesn't like the UPN show.

( It seems much more like she misses her old STATUS. Which, way to be shallow, Veronica Mars. )

However, jennyo somehow gets wind of this and writes a not-at-all-veiled response to annakovsky's review. Her usual "if you don't like what I like, then you must hate women" schtick is still in full force.

( And yet again, I can't help but point out the sexist attitude underlying this set of arguments. )

Er, yeah. But then she brings up two (even odder) arguments. The first: ( Since you don't live in California, you obviously don't know what you're talking about. )

The second: ( SoCal has 'real' class warfare. )

annakovsky, a bit bewildered, responds in jennyo's LJ:

Um, hi, JennyO. We don't know each other at all, but apparently my post made you really angry. Which is funny, since most of the things that seem to bother you about it aren't actually IN the post.

jennyo retorts that "announcing the main character is badly written/unlikeable while the male character with most of her traits is the most interesting part of the show? Is making a particular argument about Veronica's character that, consciously or not, smacks of sexism." annakovsky tries to defend herself, to which jennyo snots, "Instead you'll go run back to your journal and cry about how mean I am."

annakovsky doesn't cry, but she does make a new post in her LJ.

( Nice to meet you too, jennyo. )

This brings forth plenty of interesting snarking as well as this instant classic from thebratqueen:

( These days JennyO only comments and rants using a standard boilerplate... )

Which will undoubtedly inspire a F_W icon or two, yeah?

::sits back to watch fur fly::

::thinks that mention of fur will probably be taken as anti-queer and misogynistic::

::doesn't give a rat's ass::

7:07pm: If you believe in fairies... er, Peter, clap your hands!
___heavyhorse is a journal on LiveJournal purporting to be the online diary of wayward former Libertines co-frontman Peter Doherty. Most people in the Libs fandom are aware it's an in-joke among a group of the fankids, but occasionally, people aren't sure, as the journal lacks a disclaimer.

This would be one of those times.

It's all innocent mischief as fankids have fun with their joke, until they end up just frustrating those who don't get it.

opiumandtea is really offended by forgiveninasong's tongue-in-cheek assertion that non-believers don't deserve to be Libertines/Peter fans (note Ironic Abuse of Caps).

Witness more scepticism, deliberate imitation of Peter's post format on his own board, Morrissey quotage, and a pool for how long it would take to make it here.

Say what you like about the fandom, Libertines fangirls always know how to bring the crazy. Times like this, I'm actually grateful (instead of the usual "Oh no. Oh nononono." head-desking induced by the more rabid).