Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

12:11am: Historical Zombie Roleplaying Wank!
Baby's first wank-posting :D I'm a member of the community, but I didn't get involved apart from offering to cut some people into bite-sized pieces...

First of all, we have Dead Men Talking, an RPG where you play with historical personages (with "historical" defined as "dead for over three years", so we have Kurt Cobain and Douglas Adams partying with Julius Caesar and William Shakespeare, to name a few). The aim is satire and comedy, and tea innuendo abounds.

Second, we have Meg, who goes by theironduke on LJ (she has since bah-leeted her journal because of OMGDRAMA). Meg has previous issues with the girl who plays Wellington (the_iron_duke) in Dead Men Talking - a long story, but I won't relate it now because everything involved is deleted, friendslocked or both. Suffice it to say Meg is a bit obsessed about the Duke of Wellington and his honour. To the point of sometimes claiming to BE the Duke of Wellington (see napoleonic_dead, her "reincarnation" community) and sometimes role-playing him in RPGs.

And so the stage is set. Now, on to our main action.

First we have the first outraged anonymouse. Disrespect to carcasses OMG! (This wasn't proven to be one of Meg's bunch, but the wording sure sounds familiar...)

Now Napoleon (boney_the_ogre, now also bah-leeted) appears on the community. His player is none other than Meg. But in the same post, her once cohort crimeofthought appears as rowland_hill (a general of Wellington's) and attacks Wellington's player. Note "Napoleon's" outrage at the attack. (At this point Wellington's player didn't know "Napoleon" was Meg.)

The next round happened in e-mail and locked posts. Meg promised good behaviour and swore up and down she never meant to disrespect or hurt Wellington's player, swearing only crimeofthought was to blame, the mod agreed to let sleeping dogs lie until further notice, everyone was happy. And Wellington was happily leaving his waistcoats in Byron's rooms, don't ask.

Until yesterday. Because MEG (theironduke, no underscores) WENT BOOM! In a priceless way:

PERHAPS, SOMEDAY, YOU WILL GET WHAT IS SO DESPERATELY COMING TO YOU.

I WILL SEE YOU IN HELL, MADAME.

BELIEVE ME &TC.

-THE VERITABLE LORD OF THE PSYCHOPATHS, OTHERWISE KNOWN AS MEG

The mod took steps to ensure this doesn't repeat. Meanwhile, it turns out Meg had more than one sockpuppet in the RPG! All of them get banned. Everyone happy?

Oh noes! Meg and her cohorts have to state their intentions somewhere, they can't just leave like that! Where do they go?

The mods' journals. This is relatively mild, but where this is concerned...

Meg did NOT stalk, harrass, or berate [Wellington's player], and the post on deadmentalking was a result of disgust at the moral decency of the people, and in her opinion, the EXTREME defamation of character that was going on.

Defamation? Oh yes, DMT is Hell Personified, because we Do Not Respect historical characters!

And it /is/ defamation, not only of character, but of history, and of national identity and MANY other things. It cannot be prosecuted, that is true, but defamation regardless. It is such a pity that our society has degraded so thoroughly that you people can do what it is that you do with absolutely not sense of shame. I hope that some day you will realise that if it were not for history and certain people in it you would not be around today and that history and the dead are deserving of your deepest and most profound respect.

And finally the truth is revealed: Meg (now in the guise of maria_hortensia) is out to kill Dead Men Talking!

No, my goal is and has always been to give you enough hell to the point where you must either go F.O., you give up in frustration, or you have so many problems that it simply becomes impractical for you to maintain your sick filth any longer. In short, to remove the abomination that is DMT and to a certain degree the idiocy of [Wellington's player] from livejournal. I am normally not fond of stating such full purpose, but, that, I presume, should have been obvious enough by now.

Oh noes, what shall we do???

(Except fall down laughing. That's the obvious part.)

And in a fitting coda to this wankage, all Meg's journals involved are now bah-leeted! EDIT: with a tearful good-bye cruel world!post in her friend's journal./EDIT

Stay tuned for the return of the undead zombie vanquisher!

(Or maybe she'll get a job writing lines for Bond villains instead...)

EDIT: For the meantime, have a tearful eulogy from rowland_hill crimeofthought, complete with claiming it was LJ Abuse who deleted the journals. And he trembles before the mighty mod, claiming they're all innocent because Meg IS Wellington. And comparing her to Johnny Depp.

EDIT: 24 hours later - aaaaaan SHE'S BACK! Crying about death threats and being harrassed by mentions of Terri Schiavo, no less!

12:22am: VGCats wank??
VG Cats is a fairly popular webcomic about video games and the comics are usually pretty funny. This week's update is no exception. Or is it?

Over at vgcats_comic, wank is exploding. It all starts off very innocently, with people talking about the comic and how they find it funny. A few people, however, object and say they find it rather disgusting, but are good natured about it and don't make a bit deal.

Then seenbutnotheard makes a comment about the comic no longer being either funny nor about video games. There are the usual replies of "You try making a comic then!" but nothing too wanky yet.

And then cheesechimp comes in with the comment "That was extremely disgusting and unfunny." Some agree, others disagree and advise that perhaps they should stop reading the comic. Everyone's fine for a while, and then yet another steps forward and says This wasn't funny. And suddenly furry bashing works its way in! And from there it comes and goes with comments about it being funny mixed in with more people whining about it not being funny or not being about video games.

Not huge, but still...just wow.

9:54pm: I've got an ape drape yes I do...
well, actually I don't, but check out Billie Joe Armstrong's in high school. Yowza. And with that, once more with feeling ohnotheydidnt brings the wank.

The wank bait is laid out 2nd comment in by one save. Oh noes! who will take up this gauntlet and defend the honor of Billie Joe and Green Day??

why, cmon_steal_me will, taking on all comers. With, well, varying degrees of nonsuccess. Or perhaps little earnest fish being shot in a barrel.

just a teensy wank, but eleeetists versus ZOMGfans!! is one of my favorite wank flavors.