Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

1:51am: Swansong on the high seas... of a lonely and mysterious swan
Goodbye, cruel Master & Commander community, you say! You're sorry for everything! Except for the parts which were other people's fault, which you will discuss in lingering, portentious and cryptic language!

But... sorry, who are you, and why have you helped yourself to my hankie?

There are only two pages of posts *in* this community, and I'm pretty sure I've read most of them.

It hasn't garnered a single comment, so I guess everybody else is as mystified as me.

( You didn't deserve what I did, but I didn't deserve what you did, either )

5:47am: Lolita, engorged members and cancer!
Well, b_r_s brings the wank again, and oh does it!

The topic was raised about words that should never be used again. Somehow, as everything does, the word member appears. Cue wank (sorry herongale, but your comment seemed to be the starting point of the wankiest post EVER).

I'm not even going to attempt to summarise the sheer wank that goes on, really I'm not. However, highlights include the use of verbosity as a compliment, svelte fingers wrapping around engorged lengths (apologies if I got that wrong, my brain melted), the idea that your friend is a literary expert, actual quotes from a (in my opinion, pretty poorly written) paper of the commenter and the comparison between porn and cancer. (I suspect the point that clearedtruth is trying to make...got lost under the splooge. Both hands on the keyboard, dear, it helps!).

Also in there are our own herongale and eljuno!

8:00am: QuickQuote goes up like a Ph...like some firey bird.
So, what happened to QuickQuotes, then?

Its death and rebirth from the ashes hit like a bolt from the blue, surprising all while they worked, unknowing of what lay ahead.

Er, right?

Wankstar, the former owner, posts an e-mail which seems to tell a different story...

( In the course last night and today... )

Now, I'm not one to judge or draw conclusions, but something smells fishy in Denmark.

ETA: Tarie complains about someone e-mailing her and she and company admit to having left en masse.

2:15pm: Death Note License Wank
It wouldn't beat FMA licensing drama, still...

3:53pm: Go Wank Yourself
Hey, I love GoFugYourself.com, but the wank -- I loves her so much more.

It's a tiny one, but I figured with all the TWOP hate around here, some of you would enjoy seeing some feathers ruffled in the Damn Hell Ass Kings circle of snark elitism.

How DARE you suggest I would ever advocate RAPE! It's the ugly outfits, stoopid!!!

It was probably just a troll that instigated such outrage, but it was just enough to make Jessica disable the comments on the fugblog.

10:05pm: Death Note mini-wank
Deleted before it could really go anywhere, but I thought I'd still share a bit of it. I've got bits and pieces of the responses but I was unfortunately not around to witness it--if anyone was, feel free to fill in any gaps!

Uploaded page here, but the links are all dead (rah, firefox). Credit goes to worstangel for saving it in the first place, and to theomeny for hosting it.

glassdarkly makes a post to the death_note community and proceeds to make a series of inquiries: how yaoi is the series, does L know that Raito is Kira, is L the grim reaper...

The replies start pouring in. Some people are helpful and patient, some are rude, others are just plain baffled that somebody dare infiltrate their fandom on the pretense of yaoi. fusakugyoku even pulls the "Nostradamous" card and prophecizes the invasion of the fangirls come October (his solution? genocide).

( Little gems, for anybody too who doesn't feel like giving it a skim )

And, of course, nothing says "end of discussion" like a tasteful photoshop banner.

(and in case I'm wanked reporting a wank, major spoiler warnings for the whole series.)

EDIT: And it's been brought to my attention that the issue is still a hot one among the deathnote fen. Noteworthy is this post where they're beginning to feel the onset of panic re: the n00b invasion. Will this end up like fm_alchemist, with a ratings system for posts and a custom FAQ guide? Tune in next week whenever: same wank time, same wank channel.