Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

History

25th May 2005

1:32pm: Um, yeah, I got a little into the spooge throwing myself here, but I don't mind being ragged on for it, if that's acceptable?

LJ's community for the FFVII Advent Children movie is usually plagued by a number of easily answered questions. The latest question, however, isn't one with a simple answer, apparently.

So. Who IS Cloud dating? Is Cloud having sex at all? Is he secretly gay or an ameoba? The majority of comments seem to think that just because Cloud turned down some of the hottest girls in video game history doesn't mean he's secretly accepting some of the very attractive males of the game (Mmmm Sephiroth). They think he's just not getting any at all.

As Cloud can go on a date with a character in the game, your actions determining which, someone pointed out he can date the Mr T lookalike. They were promptly shot down for implying that our diminuitive, pretty blond hero would ever get in the sack with Barret because the big black man isn't pretty enough for Cloud's butt. There's also a lot of absolutely random character bashing for lots of different characters.

One smart, dignified person climbs up onto higher ground to point out that you can pair Cloud with anyone you so choose. And recieves the obligatory "he's straight yo" reply.

But the main drama comes from, first, the person who says that Cloud's trauma has likely impacted his sex life. Well, you know, if he can't recall what parts of his memory are his and which came from Zack, I don't see how that /couldn't/ have messed up his sex life in addition to all other manner of obvious daily functions. But as with a lot of wank, it's not what's said, but how it's said that throws the drama around.

And second, from someone who brings up that if someone involved in the creation of the game says Cloud & Aeris are twuuu wuv, then it's The Uber Canon. End of story. Once again, not what's said, but how it's said. Because she says that everyone else is merely saying an inccorrect opinion, and she out of everyone on the community has the One True Fandom Fact, in a fandom that can't even agree on name spellings.
Current Music: Tori Amos - Smells Like Teen Spirit
5:05pm: This whole community is teh wank....
Wank on off-topic posting, of all things.

From what I gathered, the whole wank springs from a poster named Raffi posting stuff that isn't Auron/Rikku. Raffi gets her feelings hurt when everyone else calls her on it.(All Raffi's posts seem to have been deleted now.) Sable_fahndu then wanks about how meen everyone was to Raffi, and people wank back.

Be warned, most of this is in varying degrees of Fangirl-ese.

If you don't want to read the whole wank, there's some really bad photomanips for your trouble here. Just scroll down some. You'll know 'em when you see 'em.

Edit: Woops, forgot to credit the mousey on Wank_Report. Thanks, mousey!
Current Mood: lazy
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