Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

11:26am: Film actors are horrible singers and should not be in movie musicals - no matter what!
My first wank!

So this wank started earlier than I first thought it would. But it comes with a twist!

So, over on Broadwayworld.com, user AngusN post a very crappy bootleg of Rosario Dawson singing "Without You" from the RENT movie, and declares that she sounds dreadful. Other posters come to her defense, pointing out that the clip is really bad and that you can hardly hear her.

User slacker, however is having none of it, and declares that movie actors have no business being in movie versions of musicals when there are LEGIT actors out there who can sing the show 8 times a week on stage:

( And it's obvious they're hiding Rosario's voice from us )

User Wax Lion slaps back in defense:

( Well, you've got some gall calling someone an insult to the Broadway Community )

This goes on, back and forth for six pages, with even the film version of CHICAGO coming under fire from dear slacker:

( Bebe Neuwirth - hello? )

( Cathrine Zeta Jones was a great Velma! )

( She has no LEGIT theater skills, so no she wasn't! )

( Oh wait - she does? Well then, NOW she's okay! )

Which brings us up to yesterday, when the Offical RENT movie website released audio clips of some of the tracks from the new soundtrack.

And the consensus was nearly unanimous: Adam Pascal sounds horrible.

( Adam Pascal sounds AWFUL AWFUL AWFUL on 'One Song Glory'. )

Most seem to really like Rosario's vocals, though one or two say she could use a little more passion. However, slacker is, again, having none of it - especially any such talk of Original Broadway Cast and LEGIT actor Adam being at all bad - and instead goes after Rosario again:

( She doesn't deserve to be in the film with the OBC - and film is a lesser medium anyway. )

*tear* Oh Broadway, you never cease to amaze me with the limitless pretentiousness many of your fans carry with excess.

12:03pm: OMGSPOILER Hilarity
Daily Show wank, which, shockingly enough, has absolutely nothing to do with slashing the correspondents. There's a first.

It starts when rocca_that_kilt makes a post to the Daily Show community sharing an mp3 of "Age of Aquarius", and mentions that the song has significance to the new Forty Year Old Virgin movie. (For those who aren't Daily Show fans, Steve Carell used to be on TDS, and they've been promoting the movie something fierce as a result.)

Harmless sharing of music? Or dastardly deed?

slickgothgurl gets snitty, and in a locked post to the community whines that this was an OMGSPOILER!!!1!1! and demands that people make their own non-TDS community to discuss the movie so she doesn't waste her $11.50, because apparently knowing a single song from the soundtrack completely ruins the entire experience.

She disables comments, which apparently motivates jesterstear to make a post mocking her for it. Cue firefight over immaturity, spoilers, et. all.

Bite-sized, but the sheer hilarity of thinking that disabling comments is a good way to prevent drama makes it tasty.

Edited to add: Journalfen's very own altoidsaddict does her good deed of the day and OMGSPOILERS the ending of Steve Carell and the Half-Blood Newsanchor.

mistah_pink proves, as if there was any real doubt, that the best way to add to wank is to try and stop it.

Now taking bets as to when slickgothgurl leaves the community in a huff.

The hits keep on coming: mistah_pink deletes the OMGBEHAVE post . . . but not before raising suspicions that he's really slickgothgurl's sockpuppet. (Oh, confirmationtality: yup, same person.)

2:34pm: They'll never let us down!
The very talented and brilliant people over at HermionePotter have really taken off the gloves now. They don't hold a grudge at all, honest.

Summary: HBP was an utterly contrived, unbelievable piece of bullshit pulled straight out of Rowling's snidely snickering ass.

Some part of me wishes Jo Rowling read some of this stuff, I really do, and actually retaliated. But she has, oh I don't know, a LIFE? Yes, moving on.

There is of course, with all H/Hr wank, the mention of Sue-Ginny:

The Insertion of a Full-Blown Mary Sue: Ginny Weasley

JKR wrote a Mary Sue, and the Mary Sue's name is Ginevra Weasley.

No question about it anymore.

Brief Explanation: A Mary Sue is a self-insertion, the manifestation of an author's wishful thinking, and the mark of an amateur, immature writer. The culprit author writes herself into the story as this Mary Sue, someone perfect (I dare you to find a real character flaw in Ginny), distinct (Ginny is the only girl, the seventh child, in her family, and she even has a queenly name), and loved by all (Ron, Hermione, Harry, everyone in Hogwarts). She distinguishes herself by being annoyingly perfect and generally superfluous to the storyline, while inexplicably becoming the hero's love interest. She is fiercely defended by her creator, and either immensely loved or immensely loathed by readers.

This describes Ginny exactly. My hat goes off to the prophetic Ana Christina for noticing and writing about it, because at least we had fair warning. To think I was going to debate against Ana in defense of JKR's writing ability.

Right.

And seriously, why all the Jane Austen references? Please let the woman rest in peace. God knows she wouldn't want her good name thrown into the mess that is Harmonian wank.

7:31pm: When cranky congoers attack......
Over on the Dragon*Con community, discussion has been going about guests canceling 2 weeks before the convention. Along comes omahastar, who blames Dragon*Con, and accuses them of not really even having booked certain guests. People try to reason with her (him? it?), that this happens at every convention, not just Dragon*Con. But according to Omahastar, if she can commit to be there, there is no reason the stars can't and that getting an acting gig isn't a good enough excuse.

http://www.livejournal.com/community/dragon_con/99632.html

10:42pm: Yet more wank on clothing.
Only this time, it's World of Warcraft wank!

It all starts with Nineve starting a thread asking Blizzard to start selling babydoll t-shirts, or generally just shirts that will fit women.

Gender wars, cam whores, trolls, and even Nazis are brought into the fray.

22 pages ladies and gents, 22 pages.

no whatz pathetic is cam !@!#&z who act shocked when they get treated like this when they acted like a cam !@!#& in the first place

EDIT: And just so you know, our old friend bitingfaery is wanking along in there as Evenwhisp...