Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

9:56am: John Byrne vs. Wikipedia.
Some mice on wank_report directed me to this one. I'd never heard of comic book artist/writer John Byrne before, but any wank involving an author vs. the fandom is pure gold.

( John Byrne doesn't want you to know he's Canadian )

5:55pm: I'm not plagiaraizing you, I just made a tribute. To Quentin Tarantino.
Maui and his friends have prettyboy mafia OCs. They even have pretty DeviantArt avatars with them. All is happy and gay until MrBlisterfists makes one of his own despite not being in their little club. Maui asks him to take it down. MrBlisterfists claims it is a "tribute", and demands an apology for Maui's "condescending attitude".
And then he start getting people banned.
Maui's fans throw shitfits over at MrBlisterfist's user page. Maui takes down his prints in protest to DA's admins being their usual competent selves.
And MrBlisterfists? Deletes his journal entries and claims to be the only one still thinking rationally.

7:34pm: Blessed Be-- Non-Harmonian Potter Shipping Wank!
If you've been keeping with Fandom Wank's Harry Potter posts, you might think most of the HP Fandom is preoccupied by Tin Hat Harmonions rewriting the 6th book to sue Hermione more effectively, or by random Mary Sue booty calls. Some of you might even belive that asll the wank about the 6th book has quietly died down and is gearing up for the 4th movie. But my friends, I am here to proclaim that there is still brilliant Harry Potter wank out there, virgin wank that has yet to be violated by FW's hive vagina in terrible, terrible, wank-on-Fanfic-rants inducing ways. All I can do is humbly submit the following links to the community on bended news and beg you to please take a minute to gaze at the spooge that results in awe, terror, fear and, yes, even mercy!

For example...

Find yourself astounded at the way Harry/Ginny and Harry/Luna fans apparently snipe at each other with the smoldering hatred of a thousand nuns! It's very east-coast-west-coast gangsta, but with fictional characters. H/L Gloat Post 2.

MANY, many more posts down below!

( Read more... )

Get the non-Harmonion, collectible wank when it's piping hot, babies! And be sure to save some copies of it soon-- if this treasure trove ever disappears, we might not see such fine specimens of Harry/Ginny wankiness until... oh say... next week?

And believe me when I tell you I use my Luna Icon with much love here. ;)

Also, about this being a Grudge Wank? Please read disclaimer below.

( Read more... )

AND MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE QUOTE FROM ALL OF THIS:

They have nothing better to do with their selves but hate a person that doesnt exist.
I shall list all of the "bitchy" things Saint Hermione has done.

10:24pm: Oh no you di'nt spoil that movie for me!
And no, I don't mean Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. This time, it's people whining about the upcoming Goblet of Fire movie (though there is a bit of HBP wank in there too). If you haven't found out who dies in the movie, don't read on. For the love of God, pick up your book and read it, since it's only five years old. Are you waiting for it to get as old as Lord of the Rings before you read it?

Anyway, a post is made in the livejournal community ohnotheydidnt, showing a picture of dead!Cedric.

starsprinkles shows up with the obligitory 'spoiler much?' comment. evenstarfall steps up to the plate and mocks about the Half-Blood Prince spoilers.

People wank and opinions are thrown about. The most popular seems to be "If you haven't read the book yet, you deserve to be spoiled!".

And for some reason, crematoria decides to get her mock Troll on by randomly posting HBP spoilers in huge, bold font.

Aside from the wankership, there are some pretty amusing pictures to be found, including these spoiler banners for HBP. My personal favorites are the crying kid banner by silversolitaire and the Snape!Sephiroth and Dumbledore!Aeris movie by amasaglajax.