Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

8:20am: SasuNaru v. NaruSasu
Gacked from wank_report.

Pairing Naruto and Sasuke is quite popular in Naruto fandom, but some people have very strong ideas about just how they should be paired.

On the SasuNaru comm, Agent420
rants about Sasuke/Naruto shippers: [WARNING: some of the pics linked in the post are NSFW]

Quite recently, I stumbled upon a few faithful NaruSasu fans spamming pics and witty dialogue in the name of fighting the good fight. Seriously, the disgusting number of butchseme!Sasuke and weepyuke!Naruto fans has started to grate rather nastily on my already frayed nervous system, and the contributions made by those sane members of the fandom was enough to inspire my own deluge of fanart.

Needless to say, response is swift.

Bonus: Apparently there is an entire comm devoted to this important question.

3:51pm: This ain't hot, it's G-A-Y!
Ninja'd from Wank_Report.

Over on fm_alchemist, moshdale posts some NWS Roy/Ling art as a present for a friend.

Everything is all warm, fuzzy, and OMG I WUV YOU until benwuhballs replies with:

( What Benwuhballs has to say about it. )

And their off, ladies and gents! Most of the replies are "If you don't like, don't look!". Bonus wankling happens when fairy1234 attempts to snark, but is owned by the sweet smell of hypocrisy.

More wank happens in the following threads-

false_smile says just ignore them!

fairy1234 says Benwuhballs is just jealous! She also says he should get a Myspace. Oh, BUUUURNED.

3:57pm: Many thanks to the two anons over on wank_report for this one!

Vozhd7 posts the following to Metaquotes:

So true!

"Harry Potter Fandom people are delusional sickos with empty lives and empty souls, who should be taken out of the public circle and have treatment forced upon them until they can return back to society as normal, functional people.

Harry Potter Fandom is a greater public health danger than the spread of crystal meth."

Quote by yobachi2003 in a blog_sociology thread.

Much merriment ensues. HP fandomers agree. Surprise is declared at the assertion that they actually have souls. Many add ‘empty souls’ to their interests.

Vozdh7 then expresses displeasure at a non-related Metaquotes post about how employees should be allowed to punch asshole customers, and at being chastised by a mod, and provides fun for all:

"You're just jealous because my metaquote got over 100 comments and yours was virtually ignored."

Small but delightful. Enjoy!

6:16pm: Anime dubs are serious business.
So there's an anime comedy series called "Super Gals", which is basically about a kogal named Ran and her friends. (If you're scratching your head over "kogal", here's a helpful link.)

I know it's hard to believe, but this zany comedy series aimed at ten year old girls failed to make a huge splash when landing here. Only the first twenty-six episodes were brought over, even though it's a fifty-two episode series. Hell, even in Japan, the second season was never released on DVD. Nevertheless, there is a hardcore contingent of fans who mostly seem to hang out on the Anime on DVD forums.

While up until now the original licensor had been noncommittal about the future of the series, an announcement was made at Anime Expo that the second half had been picked up by a different company.

( Only problem? Since this is a super-super niche title, there will be no dub. )

11:33pm: HP fandom: throwing vitriol in your face
What would f_w be without the occasional HP meta argument that becomes so batshit as to cross the line into wank?

sistermagpie writes a post about the issues regarding Marietta and Hermione. A little tl;dr as always, but all is fine and dandy and the OP isn't wanky, until newbie marionros (who was dragged into the fandom and is going to be very disappointed if the books don't live up to her specific expectations) enters the scene and proceeds to make some very enlightening comparisons:

Now, I'm Dutch. My English is usually good enough to get my thoughts across (though barely) but my cultural 'style' of debate often clashes with the American one.

There should be a square on Wanker Bingo for invoking your own nationality as an excuse. Is there a law about this one?

Amnesty International fights - amongst other things - against the facial disfigurement of women (throwing acid in a womans face is a popular 'punishment' of 'bad' women in countries like Pakistan and Bangladesh)

If MsScribe had written it, I think it would go something like Dear Msscribe,

My vry domnant husband, he reads Harry Potter and the Orders of the Phonix and he is get an idea to throws acid on my face. But your porn is empowering the acid a way.

Attack of the fpbesque capitalization!

I'm committed to Reason, you see. Emotion, sympathy, passion, these are all wonderful things, but Reason is the structure of life that keeps us sane between all these conflicting emotions.

No, never an appeal to emotions, as shown by:

What's next? Pansy Parkinson shoots her mouth off and Harry, Ron and Nevill decide to 'shut her up' by group raping her? Hey, it shut her up, didn't it? And she was a slag anyway, so she *deserved* it, right?
No. Not even counting the fact that there are other ways to deal with the problem, rape is simply not a way to 'punish' (quite apart from the fact that the right to punish lies in the hands of those in authority - in Pansy's case this would be her parents, her teachers or the law, NOT Potter and co.) No good person would ever rape. No good person would ever disfigure another person. It's as simple as that, to me.

Elsewhere, the batshit really flourishes with her angry reaction to someone's comments about their own fic:

Who knows what you'd do, if permanent facial disfigurement of a sixteen year old girl by another sixteen year old girl is your idea of justice. You'd throw vitriol in my face (popular with vindictive women in the 19th century. "Hey, bitch! I loved the man you're gonna marry! I'll make sure you'll be a blushing bride!" *splash* *augh!* *whimper* *mad howling laughter*)

Something about the actions in asterisks just brings the whole overreaction to life. Remember, Harry Potter is Serious Ethical Business!

ETA: If someone posts this to wankitywank, I know I'm seriously to blame.

ETA2: Does anyone know a way, besides counting, to tell how many comments one user has made on a single post? I think fpb is pushing 33% here by now.

ETA3: Thank you rotten_fish for making the best possible summary on wankitywank, but you'll have to keep updating, it's still going.

Also, the wiki has been updated for your browsing convenience.

ETA4: Since fpb has been banned, he can't respond to your witty comments, either. All hail Snacky.