Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

6:03am: 88th verse same as the first.
For those of you that have no idea what this wank is about here and here is a decent primer. For those of you too lazy for that, all you really need to know is that Kath & Kim is a satirical comedy series that is largely character based and points fun at lower middle class Australia.

Anyway as we all know finding wank on IMDB is a little like winning a 100 metre sprint against someone with no legs, I just never expected to find it on the Kath & Kim board, well it turns out I was very, very wrong.

It all starts when Double The Fist fanboy 02edwacu-1 posts a new topic entitled Kath & Kim is the worst comedy ever!!.

Wank ensues.

( Best bits under here, featuring bad spelling and complete lack of punctuation galore! )

Conclusion:- Double The Fist fanboys are completely batshit insane.

11:05am: Borat!
IMDB wank is, as we all know, like shooting fish in a barrel. But sometimes one needs some light, effort-free wank to get through a hard week.

The latest entry in the sweepstakes is this thread from the board for Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan. ( Read more... )
Lots of crap writing, poor spelling and grammar, rantiness galore -- it's got something for everyone.

ETA: Forgot to add a link to this hilarious account of Borat's guerilla press conference outside the Kazhakstan embassy in Washington DC from a week and a half ago. Be sure to watch the video. Sacha Baron Cohen basically wins at life.

3:15pm: Sienna Miller Makes All of Pittsburgh Wank
And not in the good way.

In the last issue of Rolling Stone, actress Sienna Miller bemoaned her tragic fate at having to play the love interest of Peter Sarsgaard and Jon Foster in the upcoming film, Mysteries of Pittsburgh based on the Michael Chabon novel... because the movie is being filmed in actual Pittsburgh. She referred to the city as "Shitsburgh," and added: "Can you believe this is my life? Will you pity me when you’re back in your funky New York apartment and I'm still in Pittsburgh? I need to get more glamorous films."

Residents of Pittsburgh, up to and including Mayor Luke Ravenstahl, didn't cotton too kindly to these remarks. Because Sienna's opinion of the city is apparently crucial, the Pittsburgh Post Gazette writes up a viciously scathing response, calling her a "semi-famous actress," implying a boycott may be in order for the film, and suggesting that if she hates the city so much, she's free to leave.

Fans of Sienna and the film over on IMDB shriek about celebrity entitlement issues, wankers take over the film's message boards and this thread, with upwards of 40 posts in a handful of days, seems to be a matrix for bitter, angry Pittsburghians. Talk of a boycott is becoming more serious over there.

The fallout seems to have made her and the movie an Internet-wide joke (which is unfortunate), and the target of a lot of ridicule because of the ensuing wank, such as the snickering and potshots that take place in this early filming report from CHUD.com, one of many.

In a recent statement given by way of her publicist, Sienna has apologized for "dissing" Pittsburgh, claiming her comments are being taken "out of context" and that it referred primarily to the fact that she hadn't had a chance to do much sight-seeing yet.

Yes, Sienna, I have no idea how anyone could've misconstrued "Shitsburgh" as derogatory. They must just be oversensitive or something.

5:44pm: Supernatural wank!
First wank, please be gentle! I got this from a mouse on wank report:

la_folle_allure (you all remember her from the "TALK TO MY GPA FUCKERS!" wank, right?) has decided that Jensen Ackles is a coke addict, and thinks if she repeats it enough, it will become fact, and strangely, other people seem convinced. She also is disgusted by Jensen's smoking habit, but since smoking=gay sex, she can live with it.

Inspired by la_folle_allure's successfully fabricated rumor, others in the fandom try their hand at it:

http://tvm.livejournal.com/61881.html

http://sevenfists.livejournal.com/62784.html

http://esorlehcar.livejournal.com/430684.html

http://annalazarus.livejournal.com/51301.html

http://ignipes.livejournal.com/135080.html

Man, that Jensen Ackles sure inspires batshit insanitydevotion in his fans.