Mock. Mockmockmock. Mockity-mock-mock

History

21st May 2013

10:28am: Toy company makes grown men rage; film at eleven.
Hasbro’s robust My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic franchise is doing something that a lot of girl-aimed television franchises have done: it’s spawning a semi-canonical tie-in movie.

The film, entitled “Equestria Girls,” is about Twilight Sparkle getting sucked into the human world, turning into a human, and winding up in what appears to be a technicolor version of Mean Girls. As you can imagine, the Brony fandom is absolutely delighted that the production team is making such a drastic change to their beloved formula and... oh wait, no, they're pitching a fit about it.

Knowing Brony fandom's reputation for grade-A unfunny, I have done my best to sift through the wank and bring you only the funny bits! (Though if you click any of the links, be warned — you're going into no-man's land.)

First off, there's some minor wanking on this April article on Equestria Daily, where some poor souls are still holding out hope that it’s not real: De Nial is a river full of hungry violent hippos... )

However, the wanking really gets going with the release of a trailer.

There is capslock o’ rage and harsh language! Cut for whinging )

There is vast overestimation of Brony fandom’s importance: Bronies make the world go round )

Some people think the anthro-ed ponies look too much like their pony selves. Because changing things is bad, but not changing things enough is also bad: Why is it different/not different? Why?!? )

Twilightisbest suggests a protest! Walk-outs and demographics and greed, oh my! )

There is talk of CENSORSHIP and the FIRST AMENDMENT! Get thee to a Civics class )

Naturally, there are conspiracy theories: Hasbro just wants to stick it to us! )

Some people are worried that the movie might be blighted by the heinous scourge known only as... [scare chord] ...the ROMANCE SUBPLOT! Anti-shipping wank, right this way )

Some people are getting a tad melodramatic: Tell me about your pony angst )

And of course there’s complaining about the complaining: Like a mobius strip! )

But at least this guy has his priorities in order:

Derpendable
The cmc have boobs..


(CMC = Cutie Mark Crusaders = Applejack's kid sister and her two little pals)

Dark Qiviut seems to be repeating himself a lot: Cut for stampede of bluish quadrupeds )

Okay, enough of that windbag. Back in the May ED posts, Blackstar033 wants the option to expunge all hints of the movie from the Equestria Daily site: Stick your fingers in your ears and go la la la )

And to top it all off, the CEO of another toy company makes a cameo:

Novem_Vulpes
Ooh boy all this hate is giving me the bronchitis. How come it is so easy to rile up the internets with a CHILDREN'S CARD GA-- I MEAN TELEVISION SERIES?

inDerpxar
SCREW THE RULES I HAVE PONIES

Seto Kaiba
don't make me send my lawyers

David_Ker
Mr Kaiba, I have a question: in your world, are court cases resolved through card games?


THE END (until the actual film comes out)

Edit: I am sososo sorry about the html fuckup. orz
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