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franny ([info]franny) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2003-10-30 01:34:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
'Cuz you have to *feel* the lurve to write about it
Can y'all stand one more Potter mini-wank?

LaFeeMechante doesn't care much for Hermione Granger. But that doesn't stop her from writing a Draco/Hermione fic that wins the Icicle Award for best fic in the 'ship. This excites her greatly, although in her LJ post announcing her win she admits she only wrote the fic because she wanted to write about Draco and doesn't like Hermione at all.

This is apparently deeply troubling to Schuywriter, who is a mod at the PIRA awards, yet another award for Draco/Hermione fics (is this ship really that big?). LaFee's fic is nominated for the PIRA Award, as well, and all hell breaks loose when the nomination is declined because LaFee is not a *true* Draco/Hermione 'shipper. (Warning: that LJ entry is *long*... so long, in fact, that it appears to have exceeded LJ's maximum entry size limit.)

Highlights include the delineation of requirements for true Draco/Hermione shipperdom, invocation of the First Amendment, an insider's view into the mind of JK Rowling and much cross-posting of private e-mails.
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(Post a new comment)


[info]wickedcherub
2003-10-30 09:05 am UTC (link)
You mean, without Twoo Wuv one cannot win a cute little graphic?

What defines a true shipper? What the shit is this?

(Reply to this)


[info]backfromspace
2003-10-30 09:11 am UTC (link)
I didn't know you could make an entry long enough for LJ's cutoff limit. And I've tried.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jumble, 2003-10-30 03:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lokifin, 2003-10-30 03:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]amasaglajax, 2003-10-30 04:55 pm UTC
Re: - [info]lokifin, 2003-10-31 08:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bubba_ray, 2003-10-30 09:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dawnswalker, 2003-10-31 12:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]terminal_frost, 2003-10-31 05:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2003-10-31 03:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]delfeus, 2003-10-31 09:40 pm UTC
Re: - [info]lokifin, 2003-11-01 05:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]electricchick, 2003-11-02 05:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bookshop, 2003-10-31 06:16 pm UTC

[info]bloodysakura
2003-10-30 09:13 am UTC (link)
*rubs eyes* I quit skimming once I got to the bright blue text on dark gray background. @.@

Chirst, some people are petty. It just sounds like someone's got her panties in a wad and feels the need to whine at ridiculously excessive lengths. I say someone ought to give Schuywriter the award for "most lengthy piece of multicolored melodrama in the fandom."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]telesilla, 2003-10-30 10:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ahiru, 2003-10-30 06:12 pm UTC

(Anonymous)
2003-10-30 09:17 am UTC (link)
Oh god!!! That just kills me. The very idea of those awards is hilarious! Oh, you cannot win this award unless you believe that Draco and Hermione are perfect for each other! How dare you say Draco and Hermione don't belong together! You make me sick! Good writing? Who cares! It is all about FATE and TRUE LOVE!

Talk about completely missing the point. What I find most hilarious is that there are so many people who actually think Draco and Hermione belong together, and created an award where they can wank over how right their ship is. It's one of the most ridiculous SHIPs in existence, possibly behind the OMGTHEYLOOKSOPRETTYTOGETHER!!!11!1SOWHOCARESIFTHEYHAVETWOLINESOFINTERACTIONINTHEBOOKS!!!11 Draco/Ginny.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wickedcherub, 2003-10-30 09:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rann, 2003-10-30 10:17 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-10-30 03:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]norabombay, 2003-10-30 06:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bubba_ray, 2003-10-30 09:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]shoiryu, 2003-10-31 05:01 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-10-31 11:33 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-11-03 06:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]delfeus, 2003-10-31 09:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-10-30 10:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bookshop, 2003-10-31 06:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]redmenace, 2003-10-30 04:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]siegfriedwanks, 2003-10-31 06:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2003-10-31 03:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-11-06 04:09 am UTC

ataniell93
2003-10-30 09:25 am UTC (link)
By this chick's definition of shippers, I'm not a shipper of anything.

Because even though I write Tom/Ginny and Moody/Mulciber (known to the weirdoes that sail it as 9/81 because of a Lightningwar joke) till the end of time, I am not so delusional as to believe that JKR will ever write them...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]napoleon, 2003-10-30 07:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]iris, 2003-10-30 08:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]biichan, 2003-10-31 10:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]delfeus, 2003-10-31 09:49 pm UTC

[info]rann
2003-10-30 09:38 am UTC (link)
Though it sounds like the rant on "true shippers" is wanky in the extreme (not even gonna try to read through something long enough to break the post buffer, at this time of night), you can kind of understand retracting a nomination for an award based on a certain ship when someone says "I hate one of the characters!" and writes a story about them anyway. Basically, it sounds like she was writing the story just for the popularity and praise, something that doesn't need to be rewarded.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wickedcherub, 2003-10-30 09:55 am UTC
Re: - [info]rann, 2003-10-30 10:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wickedcherub, 2003-10-30 11:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]deejay435, 2003-10-30 03:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]terminal_frost, 2003-10-31 05:23 am UTC
Re: - [info]deejay435, 2003-11-01 01:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bohicamouse, 2003-10-30 11:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2003-10-30 10:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]maev_connacht, 2003-10-30 11:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]limyaael, 2003-10-30 04:02 pm UTC
Re: - [info]rann, 2003-10-30 11:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2003-10-31 03:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2003-10-31 04:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rann, 2003-10-31 05:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2003-10-31 05:18 pm UTC
Re: - [info]rann, 2003-10-31 05:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2003-10-31 06:29 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2003-10-31 06:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2003-10-31 11:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]quinctia, 2003-11-01 11:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mireille, 2003-11-01 06:11 pm UTC

[info]elfy
2003-10-30 10:04 am UTC (link)
Gawd, MOST of the time I write a ship where I hate at least one of the characters - sometimes both of them.

Hell, with winning a fanfic *writing* award what should it matter as long as the writing is exceptional and carries across the whole message of the story? I mean, it's not exactly like you're being judged on your level of shippyness or any of that crap.

Why not have an award for the biggest shipper if that's the case?!

Bah.


I think we should collate ALL this HP wankage from the past ever-since-HP-wank-came-into-existence and send it to JKR with a note saying: "LOOK what your so called fans are reduced to!! Did you REALLY mean to write books that people would probably KILL each other over if they got the chance to?!"


Harry Potter: don't mind the books, but the fans are all cockspanks.

(Reply to this)

(Deleted post)
(no subject) - [info]amand_r, 2003-10-30 10:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]meril, 2003-10-30 10:44 am UTC

[info]meril
2003-10-30 10:38 am UTC (link)
Man, this is HP wank that even I won't touch...but it's here, sooooo... ::prods with 39.5' pole::

I went and looked at the fic of Ms. Whatever Fairy and damn, it sucks like a sucky thing at a sucky convention. This girl needs to be beat repeatedly with Strunk and White and given a box of capital letters...or at least be shown where to put the things. The smut may be good but I didn't get that far.

If this is what "award-winning" means for the Draco/Hermione pairing, what's the fic like that didn't win? Less hot, but with better spelling?

(Reply to this)


[info]hoorofcrowley
2003-10-30 10:48 am UTC (link)
I'm PMSing though, so you can't hold me to being a bitch, lol.

Dude, if this is true, I'm going to go destroy a few websites now. It's not like you can BLAME me! Mwah!

As to the wank itself, seriously, it sounds like someone feels that unfairly winning a weird little graphic that anyone can make is a sin. I don't pretend to understand the HP fandom and this only makes me more resolute in my ignorance.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]dawnswalker, 2003-10-31 12:45 am UTC

[info]esseilte
2003-10-30 11:59 am UTC (link)
For some reason I don't feel much sympathy for LaFee. Too much 'waah, you hurt my ickle feelings', not to mention getting her friends to gang up on the nasty mean person. If it is her friend, and not a sockpuppet. Sounds suspiciously like someone who wants to play for sympathy under her own name while swearing and bitching under another.

Yep, I'm a nasty suspicious person. Oh sorry, was that supposed to be a bad thing?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]rebeccasama, 2003-10-30 12:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-11-04 11:11 pm UTC

[info]rebeccasama
2003-10-30 12:05 pm UTC (link)
Wow. Just...wow.

This is obviously not the case with Meg. The PIRA was created for Shippers. Not for any author who writes Draco/Hermione stories. There's a difference. Maybe you'd think we're a bit touched or rabid or closed minded, but that's just who we are as a group.

Well.... she said it, not me.

If you don't support the ship in fiction and you don't support the ship outside fiction, you are NOT a Shipper. Period.

The first rule of fight club....

I have every right under the Constitution to say whatever I want. i wasn't even malicious. I simply stated that you are not a Draco/Hermione Shipper. And that's that.

Ah yes, no wank would be complete without invoking your Constitutional right to be an asshole.

You did not say you didn't like EMMA you said HERMIONE. "I got the one character I really don't like." That says character. NOT actor. You can't fool me.

Nope. Sure can't fool you by gum. MAKE a fool, on the other hand....

I'm just a really melancholic person and I can't easily let things go.

I hardly noticed!

*g* Thank you once again, HP fandom, for the wank!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-11-04 11:12 pm UTC

[info]bohicamouse
2003-10-30 12:40 pm UTC (link)
Good lord that post is painful to read. I mean literally, the tiny blue italics on the dark gray background have me reeling.

I don't understand why anyone would post an entry like that, which is just a horribly lengthy word-for-word transcript of private e-mail correspondence with almost no new commentary. Is that supposed to be interesting?

(But the wank, hilarious.)

(Reply to this)


[info]bohicamouse
2003-10-30 12:46 pm UTC (link)
Oh, also, I KNEW schuywriter looked familiar! She's the head of Ravenclaw house on one of the "elite" HP comms I joined after it got wanked here awhile back. She's even quoted in the userinfo of the comm. Check it out:

"To err is human -- to forgive, divine."

AHAHAHAHA.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]napoleon, 2003-10-30 07:40 pm UTC

(Anonymous)
2003-10-30 02:47 pm UTC (link)
I love it when people bang on about their Constitutional right to free speech. Because, of course, the entire internet is located in America.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-11-04 11:13 pm UTC

[info]jumble
2003-10-30 03:16 pm UTC (link)
*blinks*

This takes insanity to brilliant new levels.

(Reply to this)

Oh Lordy
[info]deejay435
2003-10-30 03:18 pm UTC (link)
Can one drown in wank, because I feel my airways being constricted as I speak. Before I die, two things to say:

1) Who the HELL cares how an author feels if you like the work?
2) Who the HELL cares if your fic doesn't get nominated for an award 'for shippers, by shippers'.

Tis why I stay the hell away from shipping anything. Dying now...

(Reply to this)


[info]limyaael
2003-10-30 04:07 pm UTC (link)
Though I think LaFee's whining is rather silly, I think I'm glad that she wrote a winning fic about a character she didn't particularly like. At least it's better than the fangirls out there who can never write anything other than their OTP and scream at the mere mention of any other pairing- or, heaven forbid, writing gen fanfic.

(Reply to this)


[info]snacky
2003-10-30 04:38 pm UTC (link)
From Skywriter: Maybe you'd think we're a bit touched

Um. Maybe?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]siegfriedwanks, 2003-10-31 06:07 am UTC

(Anonymous)
2003-10-30 05:14 pm UTC (link)
Oh, my.
And I who thought that a good fanfic is the one that's well written, doesn't present a lot of OOC rections and that has an interesting plot.
Now that I know it's all about the TWU LUV, I'll declare myself as unworthy and leave the writing to true shippers.
(Was that wanky enough? *beams*)
Silly me.

- canisetlupus at LJ

(Reply to this)


[info]prettyamyrose
2003-10-30 05:27 pm UTC (link)
I really don't understand this wank.

But hey, nothing like a little HP wank to get you going in the morning, right?

(Reply to this)


[info]hotpinkdragones
2003-10-30 06:56 pm UTC (link)
Oh, good god . . . how exactly were you all able to READ that entry? Paragraphs upon paragraphs of italics (already a hit to readability) following by bright green and blue on grey. I hit the first blue section and my head went "okay, headache now!"

I was tempted to copy/paste the wank into notepad in order to make it readable, then I decided it was just wank.

-hp

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2003-10-30 08:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]hotpinkdragones, 2003-10-30 08:46 pm UTC
Maybe my wank sensors have gone a bit sketchy...
[info]lasultrix
2003-10-30 09:01 pm UTC (link)
but I actually think these two are being remarkably civil to one another. The wanky think is that Schuy posted the ENTIRE THING, and that the e-mail correspondence went on for so damn long... but they're not actually behaving too wankily to each other.

I think the main problem is that people who ship pairings that stand a fair chance of happening in the books (such as R/Hr) always tend to see other ships (such as D/Hr) as not really proper ships at all. When they say 'I'm a shipper', they mean 'I believe it's going to happen in canon' and so stuff like D/Hr seems a bit silly to them.

(Reply to this)


[info]dawnswalker
2003-10-31 12:54 am UTC (link)
Personally, I think that PIRA should be allowed to decide who or who not to give out their own damn fanfiction award to, no questions asked.

Besides, truth be told, LaFee doesn't really strike me as a very gracious winner either. "Oh it's good that I got an award for challenging myself and experimenting with writing a character I don't particularly like, but look at this picture! It's stupid! The entire ship is stupid anyway! Let's all go eat pie."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2003-10-31 03:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dawnswalker, 2003-11-01 12:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2003-11-01 12:15 am UTC
*sporfle*
[info]guildenstern
2003-10-31 01:30 am UTC (link)
This....this is pure comedic genius. I just about broke my keyboard falling on it from laughing.

Also: has anyone read the latest Harry Potter fic on FicBitches on LJ? Anyone who has (and if you haven't, I suggest you do)will of course be thinking the same thing I am currently:

Namely, is LaFeeMechante the author of the FicBitch fic in question? Because if she is, it would explain a lot; considering that she hates Hermione, and apparently, so does the fic.

HP Fandom. Putting the 'Out' in 'Out of Character' since 1998.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

::eeep:: Wrong! - [info]meril, 2003-10-31 02:35 am UTC
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