NaNoWriMo wank. :D
For those of you who don't know, NaNoWriMo is "National Novel Writing Month." Basically, you sign up in October, and on November 1st, you start to write a novel. A "novel" in this context is defined as 50,000 words, or roughly 175 pages. In thirty days. Sound insane? Oh, it is. That's the fun of it, for those who are doing it.

But that's not what this wank is about! There are many forums on the site, such as the "I Hate Myself and Want to Die" forum for people who are failing miserably at their wordcounts, the "How to Procrastinate Effectively" forum which should be self-explicatory, and, my favorite, the "Character and Plot Realism Q&A."

Basically in that last, you can ask anything you want, and if somebody out there has the answer, they will post it. There was an 8-page thread on female masturbation, a 6-page thread about menstrual cramps (with a mini-wank around page 5 about male feminists, incidentally), and, of course, the ever-amusing Egregiously Erroneous Information Thread. Anything goes.

So, I have a scene in my story where two guys, 15-16, have sex for the first time. Without lube. Quick, fast, and hard. I don't know what this feels like, so I ask. I described this scene as semi-rape. Please note the semi as that will be helpful later on.

Pantalone helpfully advises me to shove a dildo up my butt, so I can write from what I know. (I wish I was kidding, folks.)

I proceed to be mortified that he misunderstood me that way, since I actually am female and do have a girlfriend and am the last person who would want to do or say anything to retard T3h Gay Cause. He informs me that he didn't misunderstand me, he simply takes exception at the... poor way I explain myself on a forum which is meant for assisting people who have no clue what they're doing.

Yuh-huh. Right.

The kicker is that the scene in question is not, goddamnit, a rape scene. It's just a scene of very hard and brutal and sudden but consensual sex. Read the thread and watch in awe as everybody in the entire world except for him gets it. (The entire world, of course, consisting of Silver, Kyaa the Catlord, Celtling, Caethes, and lintilla.)

Watch as BoldDeceiver does his/her best to keep the peace!
Watch as amasaglajax grovels, writhes, and claws at pantalone's feet trying not to offend!
Behold the invocation of Kobe!

Oh, and Pantalone is a troll now, too. I personally wouldn't have gone that far. I think saying "he behaved like an ass" describes his actions quite succinctly. This isn't really vendetta wank, as I don't know the guy. It's not even a big wank as wanks go. Just two wee threads. But hey, it's got the phrase "white diarrhea" in it. Love.