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Maura Labingi (![[info]](http://www.journalfen.net/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} mauralabingi) wrote in ![[info]](http://www.journalfen.net/img/community.gif){kind=small} fandom_wank,@ 2003-12-03 19:11:00 |
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The heartbreak of the un-gamma-corrected.
I've seen plenty of "You don't love me enough!!!!!" wank before, but none quite like this.
Webcrowmancer writes fanfic. She also apparently draws or does photomanips or something. She seems like a nice enough person, she's well-liked in her fandoms, and her stuff's pretty good.
Then she sees her website on a decent monitor, and it all goes to hell in a tantrum of Gloria-Swanson-esque proportions.
Since deleting her entire website apparently failed to make her point, the drama is continued here, complete with many of Webcrowmancer's befuddled friends going "Whaaaaaaa---???"
She very nearly hits "tilt" on the Diva-Meter. Chris Gaines is impressed.
EDIT: And she deletes the wank about deleting the website. But wait!
4:55 pm - UN. BE. LIEV-ABLE
FUCK. I am so fucking fuckedly angry.
I am fucking F.U.R.I.O.U.S.
I am fucking shocked, and sick, really.
I happened to be near a friend's monitor today, and out of curiosity, I had a look at my site, because recently, my own monitor at home, that I work on, has had a lot of flickering and trouble with contrast and brightness settings. it's basically dying.
I was shocked and horrified to discover that all, ALL, of my artwork, manips, pics, collages, wallpaper and new graphics look like complete and utter fucking SHIT.
Yep. And not one single 'friend' has told me.
Even after I've ASKED THEM. They KNOW I've had problems with my monitor.
Wow. I feel rather betrayed, heartsick, nauseous from humiliation and embarassment, and finally, REALLY, really fucking Furious.
I have no idea why no one (even after I've even TOLD people that I was having screen problems and asked them if it looked ok on THEIR monitors) would bother to take the time to actually explain to me that, well, yes, Webcrow, your graphics DO look completely washed-out. They DO look as though you've been having trouble compensating for the contrast problem with the monitor, and Yeah, the jaggy edges are showing, the manips look completely pale and one can see *all* the edges.... In fact,
The pics and graphics all look like shit.
Why oh why, would no one have bothered to tell me??? A simple gesture would have sufficed. A simple little nudge, saying, AHEM, actually you're right, Webcrow. THey look really really pale and lightened. You NEED a new monitor obviously.
I am confused, hurt, angry, humiliated, and really quite upset.
By some serendipitous stroke of fortune, my PotC DVD came this afternoon, and so I shall withdraw to lick my wounds and pull the arrows out of my back, to watch this thing and generally wonder what it was that I did wrong, to make myself such a FUCKING unapproachable person, SO fucking obviously unapproachable and unfriendly, that no one could have the decency to actually say anything to me.
I doubt very much that everyone's monitors for example are set at 100% Contrast, 100%brightness and with their Cyan/Red/Yellow levels up to about 97 to 98%.
I doubt very much that anyone, ANYONE looking at some of the recent graphics I've produced could fail to miss the absolute bleached, washed-out and colourless appearance.
I also doubt that everyone has such a low standard of fanart that they could actually believe that I would be producing graphics like this on purpose. Especially after seeing the graphics I was producing before!!!!!!!
I am so hurt, so fucking furious and embarrassed, I really do not know what to say. I'm rather speechless. I feel stabbed in the back.
I've been making pics for people and they all say, "OOH, webcrow, that is so great, thank you so much,"
HAH. Really?
Does the idea of 'great' somehow come from the fact that it is better than anything they could produce themselves?? I find that hard to believe.
are they jealous at my attempts to create?
are they humoring me?
are they kissing ass because I write fanfic in such voluminous amounts?
I suffer from PTSD and a severe lack of self-confidence and self-esteem. I pride myself on being HONEST and truthful, and sincere with my friends.
Have I offended people by writing supposedly high-quality fic and making supposedly high-quality art?
I could cry, except that I can't SEEM to be able to cry just now because I feel so angry as well. I feel punched in teh stomach.
All the fiction that I've been writing...I suddenly have to wonder if people really do like it. Because if no one had the balls or the decency to say to my face, honestly, that my graphics look like bleached SHIT, how can I beleive that anyone really likes the fic?
I'm very confused, because I thought, I believed anyway, that when one says something is good, they MEAN it. I findn it really fucking hard to believe that anyone looking at all my art and graphics on my site (allll those hits LOL) could actually find them looking anything OTHER than washed out and with horrible jagged "obvious" manipped or cut/pasted edges all over. I mean, I'm EMBARASSED at how awful it all looks. I feel SICK aboutit.
My site's pages of late have all the appearance of being produced by someone with a vision problem.
I cannot believe that everyone else is BLIND.
So I am honestly fucking confused here.
I'm removing the offending html pages, and therefore retreating out of fandom into my little darkened room where I can take some time to try to understand the nature of humanity and fandom.
I shall immerse myself in the DVD and contemplate the nature of piracy.
Betrayal? yep. Check. Um,....mutiny? possibly.
Marooned, definitely.
Weighing anchor and setting sail for a bit, under a dark cloud.
Webcrow
current mood: infuriated
I've seen plenty of "You don't love me enough!!!!!" wank before, but none quite like this.
Webcrowmancer writes fanfic. She also apparently draws or does photomanips or something. She seems like a nice enough person, she's well-liked in her fandoms, and her stuff's pretty good.
Then she sees her website on a decent monitor, and it all goes to hell in a tantrum of Gloria-Swanson-esque proportions.
Since deleting her entire website apparently failed to make her point, the drama is continued here, complete with many of Webcrowmancer's befuddled friends going "Whaaaaaaa---???"
She very nearly hits "tilt" on the Diva-Meter. Chris Gaines is impressed.
EDIT: And she deletes the wank about deleting the website. But wait!
4:55 pm - UN. BE. LIEV-ABLE
FUCK. I am so fucking fuckedly angry.
I am fucking F.U.R.I.O.U.S.
I am fucking shocked, and sick, really.
I happened to be near a friend's monitor today, and out of curiosity, I had a look at my site, because recently, my own monitor at home, that I work on, has had a lot of flickering and trouble with contrast and brightness settings. it's basically dying.
I was shocked and horrified to discover that all, ALL, of my artwork, manips, pics, collages, wallpaper and new graphics look like complete and utter fucking SHIT.
Yep. And not one single 'friend' has told me.
Even after I've ASKED THEM. They KNOW I've had problems with my monitor.
Wow. I feel rather betrayed, heartsick, nauseous from humiliation and embarassment, and finally, REALLY, really fucking Furious.
I have no idea why no one (even after I've even TOLD people that I was having screen problems and asked them if it looked ok on THEIR monitors) would bother to take the time to actually explain to me that, well, yes, Webcrow, your graphics DO look completely washed-out. They DO look as though you've been having trouble compensating for the contrast problem with the monitor, and Yeah, the jaggy edges are showing, the manips look completely pale and one can see *all* the edges.... In fact,
The pics and graphics all look like shit.
Why oh why, would no one have bothered to tell me??? A simple gesture would have sufficed. A simple little nudge, saying, AHEM, actually you're right, Webcrow. THey look really really pale and lightened. You NEED a new monitor obviously.
I am confused, hurt, angry, humiliated, and really quite upset.
By some serendipitous stroke of fortune, my PotC DVD came this afternoon, and so I shall withdraw to lick my wounds and pull the arrows out of my back, to watch this thing and generally wonder what it was that I did wrong, to make myself such a FUCKING unapproachable person, SO fucking obviously unapproachable and unfriendly, that no one could have the decency to actually say anything to me.
I doubt very much that everyone's monitors for example are set at 100% Contrast, 100%brightness and with their Cyan/Red/Yellow levels up to about 97 to 98%.
I doubt very much that anyone, ANYONE looking at some of the recent graphics I've produced could fail to miss the absolute bleached, washed-out and colourless appearance.
I also doubt that everyone has such a low standard of fanart that they could actually believe that I would be producing graphics like this on purpose. Especially after seeing the graphics I was producing before!!!!!!!
I am so hurt, so fucking furious and embarrassed, I really do not know what to say. I'm rather speechless. I feel stabbed in the back.
I've been making pics for people and they all say, "OOH, webcrow, that is so great, thank you so much,"
HAH. Really?
Does the idea of 'great' somehow come from the fact that it is better than anything they could produce themselves?? I find that hard to believe.
are they jealous at my attempts to create?
are they humoring me?
are they kissing ass because I write fanfic in such voluminous amounts?
I suffer from PTSD and a severe lack of self-confidence and self-esteem. I pride myself on being HONEST and truthful, and sincere with my friends.
Have I offended people by writing supposedly high-quality fic and making supposedly high-quality art?
I could cry, except that I can't SEEM to be able to cry just now because I feel so angry as well. I feel punched in teh stomach.
All the fiction that I've been writing...I suddenly have to wonder if people really do like it. Because if no one had the balls or the decency to say to my face, honestly, that my graphics look like bleached SHIT, how can I beleive that anyone really likes the fic?
I'm very confused, because I thought, I believed anyway, that when one says something is good, they MEAN it. I findn it really fucking hard to believe that anyone looking at all my art and graphics on my site (allll those hits LOL) could actually find them looking anything OTHER than washed out and with horrible jagged "obvious" manipped or cut/pasted edges all over. I mean, I'm EMBARASSED at how awful it all looks. I feel SICK aboutit.
My site's pages of late have all the appearance of being produced by someone with a vision problem.
I cannot believe that everyone else is BLIND.
So I am honestly fucking confused here.
I'm removing the offending html pages, and therefore retreating out of fandom into my little darkened room where I can take some time to try to understand the nature of humanity and fandom.
I shall immerse myself in the DVD and contemplate the nature of piracy.
Betrayal? yep. Check. Um,....mutiny? possibly.
Marooned, definitely.
Weighing anchor and setting sail for a bit, under a dark cloud.
Webcrow
current mood: infuriated
