Current mood:

enraged

Not-So Mini LotR Wank
Not-So-Mini LotR wank on rugbytackle (The LJ version, not the JF version). Usually a peaceful, smutty community, but nothing is safe from Teh Wank!

In case the entry gets deleted, I'll be cutting & pasting most of the stuff here. It used to be short, but is now getting longer as the offended party proceeds to rip apart *everyone* who posts in the thread, including people not even *talking* to her. Childish name-calling, accusations of trolling, homosexuality, and bashing a slash community for hosting only *gasp* SLASH fanfics - what this wank lacks in quantity, it makes up for in quality.

makamu:
I just stumbled on this wonderful fic about Aragorn as Thorongil and a very cute 3-year-old Boromir. It is G-rated, but a plot bunny is still biting down on my wrist, because what if Aragorn stayed longer in Gondor (*glances at "The Tale of Years" quickly*), say until 2998 ;). I don't know about you, but I have always thought about Thorongil as the Captain of the Ithilien Rangers as long as he was in Gondor. What do you guys think? What if Denethor sent him on a dangerous mission for 17 years and he came back to Minas Tirith only to find his pitya (little) Boromir has grown into a quite handsome young man? ;) Does that sound good? For I think I will do the research now and write the stuff down during the holidays. BTW, if you read this on rugbytackle and are a native speaker, I am still searching for a beta. Interested? Just leave a comment and I will contact you. Thanks!! :)

Seems like an ordinary enough post, until the comments start rolling in.

thalassatx: Let me just point out that that is NOT a wonderful fic. I only read a few paragraphs, and I can assure you, it is not a fic you want to emulate.

nemesisdescends: Is this familiar, troll?

what do you do when someone pesters the living fuck out of you by posting nasty retorts to EVERY comment you make, no matter how innocent?

"I post on a board I love, where there's no banning. Which I like, because I don't believe in banning, for the most part. But there's this chick who just HOUNDS me."

YOU are the one who is now hounding this author - i have seen you slate her several times with no real justification. You seem determind to slap her down. It must reflect on your life, you have nothing better to do than make other feel as small as possible.

Your post(s) are flames and are not reviews or constructive disagreements. You are a fan of slash and yet you keep going back to this one authors work.

I think you are secretly jealous - maybe you even fancy her? Back off you psycho lesbian tart! We have many of the same friends (Elisa to start with) and its only a matter of time before i find out who you really are and let this authors friends at you!

[ Semi-related Bit of Hilarity: ] From nemesisdescends's userinfo: Nemesis Descending was born form the wrath of all decet fanfic writers everywhere.

annuminas: Excuse me...hunny! I will have you know that that fic is a bloody brilliant fic. May I ask what makes you such a bloody critic! I must admit I had already heard of you by reputation - it looks like the comments were correct and that you are in fact an inconsiderate, mouthy cow! Flame you if you want - because frankly - I do not give a flying F****!

I will have you know madame that I betaed that fic over!

If you are such an expert kindly present us with some of your literary work - and we will all laugh and pick holes in it!

That was BLOODY CRUEL!

You better not cross my path again HUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!

lol,

PAPILIO - one enraged Papilio!

ETA: The Plot Thickens! The author sees the thread and
evendim:
I have just been alerted to this post. It was taken from either my website or F.F.Net without my agreement and without even a credit! I accept it was probably well intentioned! You need NOT concern yourself about an outbreak of war on my behalf! I am LEAVING Live Journal for good! Bitch face cowardly Thass- a- stupid- bloody -name- isn't- it has done this to me before! Clearly Mods don't mind cows flaming people who were NOT even submitting their own material! Try putting a muzzle on this little turd; she does you no credit! If anyone has the balls that is! I know she's one of the 'Clique' but the rest of you are tainted by her! Consider this my last post!

[ Wow. I think she just stole all of not_orli's exclamation points. ]

The above post was in response to one of the mods asking them to take the flame war elsewhere.

ETA 2: And the wank keeps flowing.
firnwingiel: This fic could certainly do with another beta for punctuation.

Paige is a name.

page n. 1. liveried boy employed to go on errands or act as a door attendant etc.

Either the author or her beta seems to be confused about the difference.

It's not such a bad fic, all told, but it's not a great fic either; and it's certainly not worth defending by calling someone who happens not to like it, and who said so without flaming or behaving like a troll, a: psycho lesbian tart!.

Take some prozac nemesisdescends and go look up a more accurate description of the word troll.

Oh, and perhaps publicly threatening to troll another user ("and its only a matter of time before i find out who you really are and let this authors friends at you!") isn't a smart move.

nemesisdescends: Its hard not to!

Her post WAS a flame. When someone ventures an opinion and it is not meant as an insult, there are hundreds of ways to do so without causing offence to the author.

I had to delurk on this matter - Thalassa has been targeting this author as if on a personl vendetta! No one has intervened or even bothered to help Evendim. Its a sorry day when a complete stranger notices first! You are all far too cliquey - there are tons of worse fictions and writers on the web to target.

This group is far from welcoming and friendly as is - im leaving too.

You can keep your bitchyness and spend hours trolling for amusement, being two faced is something mastered here.

BTW - Paige means "youthful assistant" and is derived from Page. The variant spelling is colloqial for each country and in the context used was acceptable in Britain and France. As the word is Italian to start from, in context, either could be used.

firnwingiel - your post, although defensive, it constructive feedback and i know fully well the difference.

ETA 3: Ah, and what wank would be complete without a deleted post? To see the deleted comment, click here for the screencap, courtesy of crickets.

ETA 4: Wow. I wake up this morning and the wank has fully exploded.

Congratulations! You've just won Overreacter of the Year!

Sheesh.

~M, not logged in

evendim: At least I won SOMETHING besides abuse!

[ Me: Right then... ]

In response to thalassatx's apology to the mod, evendim says: LIAR! GROVELLING TO MODERATOR LIAR!!

firnwingiel suggests that the author might want to actually take into account criticism of her story. evendim responds: I don't mind criticism. I mind HER criticism! The fact is the reviewer whom she reduced to a mad troll hunter actually pasted in comments that Thass... sorry, I cannot be ARSED WITH THAT IDIOT NAME, sent to a raft of other authors! She deleted that section of the comment! She also deleted an entire thread last night to cover comments BEFORE running to Milochka? Sorry! Have no stomach for her kind! Oh, and people DO read my fics! People like me, simple people who want to pass some time in reading about a fandom they love! I make no claims to be technically sound! I stay in my little corner of F.F.Net and am happy to be left there! Oh that missy T. would do the same! Thanks for taking the time, and yes, if I feel moved to post a review I DO read it all! If I hate it as much as she clearly hated my fic I would also stop reading, but I'd do so in silence!

fileg actually posts something on-topic to the original post, helping the OP with some timeline issues. evendim gets offended at *that* too!

Sadly, the only qualification needed on this site is a large dollop of slash! Which is why I didn't post 'My brother' here!

[Me: Um. Right. So the part where rugbytackle is All Viggo/Sean, All the Time didn't tip her off to the fact that this is a slash comm...]

And evendim even gets offended at the original poster for getting slash bunnies from her story.

The whole POINT is that this is a Gen rated story and that I am not happy that the originator intended to add 17 years and slash it! I do NOT write SLASH! One kid who reads my work is 13 and could teach some of you manners!

(Post a new comment)

	loki 2003-12-06 01:31 am UTC (link)
	Wow. An invocation of Ebert's law right off the bat... (Reply to this)

	smo 2003-12-06 01:33 am UTC (link)
	I wonder if they sell Psycho Lesbian Tart at the bakery down the street. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	(Anonymous) 2003-12-06 01:49 am UTC (link)
	You can generally find it next to Histronic Gay Custard. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	slashcat 2003-12-06 05:24 am UTC (link)
	They must sell it. Look! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	musette 2003-12-06 06:38 am UTC (link)
	::fangirls icon:: And it's pretty and PURPLE even! Mommy, can I be a psycho lesbian tart when I grow up too?? (Reply to this)(Parent)

	sarajayechan 2003-12-06 08:59 am UTC (link)
	XD!!! I LOVE IT! I'm saving it for future use. XD (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: slashcat 2003-12-06 09:00 am UTC (link)
	Eeexcellent. Feel quite free, it's here for that reason. ;) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	smo 2003-12-06 08:21 pm UTC (link)
	Maggie Smith = awesome. Maggie Smith +_Shakespeare references = Mega-awesome. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	smo 2003-12-06 08:43 pm UTC (link)
	I love you so much, it burns. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	slashcat 2003-12-06 11:54 pm UTC (link)
	I hear the doctor makes a cream for that... =D ...and, as for the other comment (on Maggie), thank you. flaunts 1337 ic0nz skillz (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	smo 2003-12-07 03:03 am UTC (link)
	Someday, I too will have icon skillz. wistful (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: slashcat 2003-12-07 03:04 am UTC (link)
	Until then, you should stock up on good bribe-goods, or just say nothing but brilliantly witty things that make people beg to icon for you. ;) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	smo 2003-12-07 03:46 am UTC (link)
	stocks up on bribe-goods (Reply to this)(Parent)

	virago 2003-12-06 08:34 pm UTC (link)
	I was just about to comment that "psycho lesbian tart" is second only to "cock-sucking lesbian" on my list of favorite wank-derived namecallings. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	smo 2003-12-06 08:45 pm UTC (link)
	Cock-sucking lesbian? FLCL makes more sense than that. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	mariagoner 2003-12-07 05:30 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah. Cock sucking is pretty gross and dull even for heterosexual girls. I have no idea why lesbians would want to do it at all. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	sagralisse 2003-12-08 04:59 pm UTC (link)
	wha? Are we generalizing much? (Reply to this)(Parent)

gabbyhope
2003-12-06 01:36 am UTC (link)

Oh, sure, it's a horrible fic (including the longest sentence there ever, ever was, I see), but why would someone point that out in public like that? Not incredibly smart on the commenter's part. Maybe this person is new to fandom and they haven't yet figured out the good from the bad. Maybe they like that sort of fic. Who the hell knows. I thought it was common courtesy not to say, um, dude, you have no taste whatsoever. You snigger and move on. They were just asking for the omg u suck!1 to roll in.

And, oh lord, that beta reader kills me. I can only guess what the betas consist of. If it's anything like that comment, no wonder the story isn't Shakespeare.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	iczer6 2003-12-06 01:47 am UTC (link)
	[You snigger and move on. They were just asking for the omg u suck!1 to roll in.] Well I think that poster had a point, the fic does have some grammar issues and I have to agree that it's not a good idea to imitate the author's run on sentences. This person wasn't really outright flaming the fic or the author just stating that it has some problems. Icz (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: gabbyhope 2003-12-06 01:55 am UTC (link)
	If they had said "it has some problems," I'd agree with you. There was no mentioning of the grammar issues. They could have been referring to any aspect of the story, which, you know, isn't wonderful in the least, but damn. Besides, the person who recced the story seems to be more enthralled with the plot, not with the style of writing. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	iczer6 2003-12-06 03:27 am UTC (link)
	I agree, they really could've used a LOT more tact, and maybe given some reason why they didn't think it should be rec-ed. But I just don't think the comment warrented this explosion of, er, wank [for lack of a better term]. Icz (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	smo 2003-12-06 08:22 pm UTC (link)
	::bursts out in raucous laughter at your icon:: It's Super-Uke! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	mauralabingi 2003-12-06 01:52 am UTC (link)
	I had an enraged Papilio once, but some penicillin cleared it right up. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	gairid 2003-12-06 03:54 am UTC (link)
	You have to watch it when you have an Enraged Papilio, because it's sometimes exacerbated by an Exclamatory Evendim. hands you a prescription (Reply to this)(Parent)

crickets
2003-12-06 02:09 am UTC (link)

Oh, ick. Run-on sentences, grammatical errors, spelling errors, punctuation errors, needless attempt to copy Tolkien's style (please make it stop) and then baby talk. Just a few paragraphs are enough to send me quietly backing away from it.

If she had to say something, thalassatx might have politely sent some constructive crit to the author in private. (Though you can tell the author is trying so hard to write a Great Story that any attempt to point out her mistakes would probably do more harm than good.) I can understand someone thinking it's horrible, but just blurting out the fact is needlessly cruel and stupid. Then again, the over-the-top 'psycho lesbian tart!' is teh funneh.

Good on the mod for the quick smackdown. As if it will do any good.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: lamath 2003-12-06 02:11 am UTC (link)
	As if it will do any good. And it looks like you're right. gives you cookie I just edited this post to add the hissy fit thrown by the author in response to the mod's post. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	crickets 2003-12-06 02:14 am UTC (link)
	::munches cookie happily:: Thanks! ::rushes back to the wank:: C-can't turn away! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	darkrose 2003-12-06 04:38 am UTC (link)
	Oh, ick. Run-on sentences, grammatical errors, spelling errors, punctuation errors, needless attempt to copy Tolkien's style (please make it stop) and then baby talk. The "poetry" at the beginning of each chapter was actively painful to read. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	zana16 2003-12-06 06:09 am UTC (link)
	What, I ask you, is wrong with being a psycho lesbian tart? PLTs of the world, unite! You have nothing to lose but your ~~minds~~ ~~men~~ chains. Or your custard. Or whatever. (Reply to this)

bohicamouse
2003-12-06 06:37 am UTC (link)

Excuse me...hunny! I will have you know that that fic is a bloody brilliant fic. May I ask what makes you such a bloody critic! I must admit I had already heard of you by reputation - it looks like the comments were correct and that you are in fact an inconsiderate, mouthy cow! Flame you if you want - because frankly - I do not give a flying F****!

Oh great, a beta reader who can't use correct punctuation or count the letters in "fuck."

I too love the random "lol." Does she sign all her posts that way or something?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: lamath 2003-12-06 06:41 am UTC (link)
	I too love the random "lol." Does she sign all her posts that way or something? I don't know, but I think it sort of takes away from the effect of an angry rant when someone randomly tacks on "lol" at the end. Unless, of course, the laughing is actually fiendish cackling, in which case it might be appropriate. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	crickets 2003-12-06 06:48 am UTC (link)
	Hee! I also love the 'Beata' volunteer who can't spell the word beta. That is too precious. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: lamath 2003-12-06 06:49 am UTC (link)
	Unfortunately, that post seems to have been deleted. Did anyone save it, by chance? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	crickets 2003-12-06 06:53 am UTC (link)
	You are so in luck. I have it loaded in another tab. Screen caps, view source -? I prefer to capture the source code, since it's easier and smaller, but if there's a reason that screen caps are considered preferable, that's doable. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: lamath 2003-12-06 06:56 am UTC (link)
	I'm thinking some people might prefer screencaps for authenticity reasons, but feel free to copy/paste Teh Funneh if it's easier. g (And the response to that post was pretty funny, too.) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	ataniell93 2003-12-06 09:31 am UTC (link)
	bows It just needed to be said. I can't believe she deleted! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	crickets 2003-12-06 06:56 am UTC (link)
	Oops, my bad. Only the post is gone, not the whole page. I can e-mail a screen cap. Unfortunately I don't have any online file space right now or I'd post it somewhere. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: lamath 2003-12-06 06:58 am UTC (link)
	E-mail me at: lamath2003@yahoo.com to send the cap. :-) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	crickets 2003-12-06 07:11 am UTC (link)
	Done! The gif was the most compact file I could come up with, so apologies if the quality suffered. And I'm one of those people who surfs with a default gray background to save my eyeballs, just to let you know. Enjoy. (Reply to this)(Parent)

Just the numbers (and a spot of trivia)...

helens78
2003-12-06 06:28 pm UTC (link)

Number of times

evendim said she was going to leave LJ altogether: 2.
Number of comments she left after making this grievous threat: 16 (including one comment that repeated her threat to leave).

On the bright side, she does have a nice link in her (non-cancelled) journal leading people to a page full of Sean Bean extracts. If you're not gonna cancel your journal after threatening to do so more than once, you definitely oughta have links to Sean Bean audio files up there, so people who are looking to point and laugh can get thoroughly distracted.

ETA: BTW, remember that beta reader who got so up in arms and signed off with a random "lol"? It's

evendim's daughter.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: Just the numbers (and a spot of trivia)... loki 2003-12-06 11:15 pm UTC (link)
	This chick needs to lay off the exlaimation!!!! already... (Reply to this)(Parent)

	mauralabingi 2003-12-07 05:27 pm UTC (link)
	There's something intrinsically wrong about beta'ing for your mom. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	sagralisse 2003-12-08 05:16 pm UTC (link)
	Even if it's OMG-NOT-SLASH-and-you-people- who-even-think-about- slash-while-reading-it-are-perverts- and-should-all-be-ASHAMED? (Reply to this)(Parent)

	arabella 2003-12-07 03:05 am UTC (link)
	Alas, the offending story is no longer at The Pit. ::Sheds a tear, because now she can't MST it.:: (Reply to this)(Thread)

	mariagoner 2003-12-07 05:34 pm UTC (link)
	I love that lovesome icon of yours. Love love love. And are you Arabella from Sugar Quill? Or am I getting you confused with someone else? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	arabella 2003-12-07 07:48 pm UTC (link)
	It's a pretty neat icon... the guy who made it wasn't even all that rabid about credit. Snag it if you want for future use. The dude who made it is named Mattdalf. Alas, no, I am not the same Arabella. I don't play in HP circles much. My entire HP contributions are two half-page shorts. (Reply to this)(Parent)