Current mood:

Candy-Coated

Grobanites Making Fools of Themselves
Well, okay, I just wanted an excuse to show off my GrobanWank icon. And I still think 'GrobanWank' sounds like a German sausage.

A while back, somebody requested poetic wank... so we had that wanky little poem about fanfiction and self-esteem that led on to the troll wank to end all troll wanks... and now we have this. There are not one, but two poems floating around the 'Friends of Josh Groban' messageboards.

Josh Groban:The Dark Eyed Angel From Above
by cutelilgrobanite23

His Eyes are brown
Yet dark as night
But it's his smile
That gives him light.

And Oh, That Voice!
So smooth as silk
Yet soft as velvet.
The notes that he sings
float as if with wings
into my waiting ears.

Every time I look at him
In picture after picture
It's as if the vision changes
Into something even better.

The many languages he knows
and puts so easily to notes
Sound like angels up above.

My best friend once said
His voice makes the angels silent
And every time I hear him sing
Something else comes true-
My heart grows warm inside
And I am silent too!

His voice calms the storms
that brew inside my soul
And the playing of his CD
Over and over again
Will never be an act
That ever grows old!

Your Voice Makes The Angels Silent (An Ode to Josh Groban)
by By: Kiera Bracken

You are my Autumn, for your hair is as brown as a beautiful oak tree.
You are my Spring, for you make the flowers bloom with your voice.
You are my Summer, for your voice warms my heart.
The winters are less cold and not as dark for you are in my world.

You sing foreign words like they are your first language.
That is part of the beauty of you.
Your voice makes the angels silent for they want to listen to you "Sing To Life."
When I heard you sing, I wanted to find out what the words meant.
I found out what they meant because I wanted the connection.

I wanted the connection between your voice and your words.
Your deep, dark eyes make me realize just how deep your music is.
Your voice has no age.
Your voice is like a prayer.
The angels stay silent when your voice is in the air.

I find myself needing your voice every day and the Angels agree.
This is a strange place to be stuck in the middle of a dream.
Your voice makes the angels silent and leaves me wishing it were more than a dream.

Oh, and on a slightly less wanky note (I sympathize with this one and even took part), the people on the Josh Groban community on livejournal have been wanking about how much less wanky they are than FoJG.

Stop complaining that the calendar sucked! You should be glad you got anything with Josh on it!

I don't feel like a 'friend' at FoJG...

Stop complaining! I'm not complaining about the complaining, really...

I hate llamas!

EDIT: Okay, how did I manage to forget the precise definition of 'Grobanite'? (The answer, of course, is 'us, not them, because we're 1337er'.)

(Post a new comment)

	smo 2003-12-11 08:59 pm UTC (link)
	There used to be a site that had poems like that about Kevin Spacey. I couldn't make that up if I tried. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	serai 2003-12-11 10:31 pm UTC (link)
	I think my brain just exploded. Wait - yes, it did. There it is. I can see it splattered all over the wall. Curious. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	mariagoner 2003-12-11 10:40 pm UTC (link)
	See any special patterns? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	panthea 2003-12-11 11:22 pm UTC (link)
	Like the NBC peacock, perchance? [/billhicks] (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	&hearts; cesare 2003-12-12 02:49 am UTC (link)
	I USED TO BE FUNNY ONCE! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: &hearts; panthea 2003-12-12 03:32 am UTC (link)
	SUCKER OF SATAN'S COCK (Reply to this)(Parent)

	serai 2003-12-12 02:24 am UTC (link)
	Hm. Over in the corner, between my slash painting of Frodo/Sam and my plush bear - it looks like, why yes. It's the Virgin Mary. She looks annoyed. Can't blame her really. Brain fragments are so hard to clean off samite. Either that, or it's a ham sandwich. Hard to tell since I'm losing consciousness fast. Is that you, Great-Grandma? Why do you smell like oranges? (Reply to this)(Parent)

What do my elf eyes see?

darkrose
2003-12-11 09:48 pm UTC (link)

An RPF wank in the making!

I have issues with fans who write fan fiction about a REAL person. Especially when they bloody know that said person ocassionally stops by the forums.

Ooh!

Now that said, I would never put my RPS up anywhere that I knew Jason might be looking. Even though I strongly suspect his primary reaction would be, "Um...Liam Neeson? That's not gonna fit there." But still.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: What do my elf eyes see? eljuno 2003-12-11 09:52 pm UTC (link)
	I've been noticing RPF wank threatening to spurt all over, lately, even in places which have absolutely nothing to do with RPF whatsoever. Kinda strange, really. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: What do my elf eyes see? mariagoner 2003-12-11 10:34 pm UTC (link)
	So... wait. There's Josh Grobin RPF posted up? In places he can see? Is that why there's been RPF wank? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: What do my elf eyes see? virago 2003-12-12 03:26 am UTC (link)
	I think they're equating the squealy fangirl fantasy in the poetry with RPF. Like so: squealy fangirl fantasy -> thinking of real people as lust objects -> RPF. At least that's how it's coming across. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: What do my elf eyes see? mariagoner 2003-12-12 03:39 am UTC (link)
	Ah. Thanks for the summary! It still doesn't make sense to me. Though really, that's probably because it doesn't make much sense at all. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: What do my elf eyes see? laymedown 2003-12-12 05:19 am UTC (link)
	Yep. For some inexplicable reason, people post Mary Sues ON HIS OFFICIAL BOARD. Which he reads and comments on relatively often. Now, I have no problem with fanfiction, but I do find that a little sketchy (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: What do my elf eyes see? isntitironic 2003-12-12 05:43 am UTC (link)
	Particularly when you consider that the guy does have a girlfriend. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	mariagoner 2003-12-11 10:35 pm UTC (link)
	And also... they're corny as hell but I kinda like the poems. Reminds me of things I wrote about my crushes back in... oh I dunno... eight grade. Though at least I made an effort to have my corny poetry rhyme, by God! (Reply to this)(Thread)

	serai 2003-12-12 02:27 am UTC (link)
	I rather liked how the first fan started out with a strict rhyme meter and then just lost interest. Great fakeout there. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	embitca 2003-12-11 11:46 pm UTC (link)
	So is there Josh Groban slash? Heh. (Reply to this)

	musette 2003-12-12 12:03 am UTC (link)
	Oh MAN, this reminds me the poem that the president of my very first fanclub (Christopher Carl, Raoul in the San Francisco production of Phantom of the Opera). I wish I still had that, it was so badly amusing. All I remember is that it started "Christopher Bay Carl, you are so beautiful to me." ::wipes a tear:: Man, good times. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	(Anonymous) 2003-12-12 02:42 am UTC (link)
	this is going to sound so random... i was a sound tech for a show that chris was in recently (meaning i put his mic on and such). but he has a fanclub? holy crap, that's hilarious. :-) and bad poems to go with it? you just totally made my day, i salute you. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re:

musette
2003-12-12 05:54 am UTC (link)

Hehe, the fanclub is moderately defunct now, but he's got a legion of very devoted, fairly frightening, mostly middle aged fans. It says something that even at the age of like 12 I was vaguely disturbed by the whole thing.

He's a great guy, he was always exceedingly nice to me in my excitable pre-teen/early teens phase. There was a calendar and such even, ask around and see if anyone still has it, it's /extremely/ funny.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

	off_key 2003-12-12 02:16 am UTC (link)
	I have to insert an annoying personal story here and tell y'all that Josh used to babysit for a friend of mine (they were in different grades at the same school) -- and the idea of Josh the Babysitter and Josh Teh Greatest Person Evar To Walk Teh Planet as one and the same does not compute. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	isntitironic 2003-12-12 03:35 am UTC (link)
	Duuuuude, you didn't happen to save any of his used water bottles, did you? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: off_key 2003-12-12 04:09 am UTC (link)
	You know, I had one for, like, three years, up on my mantle inside a glass case with a sign reading "JOSH'S WATER BOTTLE WITH HIS DNA I WILL CLONE!!!!!1111" on it, but I think I threw it out in the move. Damn. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	*I'm an ljer, therefore have no journalfen. Sad. sigh* Not so much...** (Anonymous) 2003-12-12 11:24 am UTC (link)
	Haaa! Josh the Babysitter. That's amusing. I don't know. I just can't get my head around that. LoL! (Reply to this)(Parent)

gaisce
2003-12-13 10:33 am UTC (link)

Yes, to the mind boggling prospects. I went to a taping of his PBS show (my mom and I thought he was very cute and the tickets were free) and I was traumatized by the amounts of freakish behavior people had...at a PBS show. I ended up talking to a guy in the audience who turned out to be his old history teacher and the commentary on Josh the not-so-dedicated history buff and Josh the wank-generator makes my head spin still.

(Especially since how not being a history buff makes wanky Goodwin's Law less likely to pop up...)

(Reply to this)(Parent)