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Maura Labingi ([info]mauralabingi) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2003-12-20 18:58:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood:*sporfle!*
Current music:"I know all there is to know about the crying game..."
Entry tags:fandom: lord of the rings, person: victoria bitter

Lord, forgive me for what I am about to do.
But it's just too fucking funny to resist.

Remember Victoria Bitter? Sure ya do! After all, when someone becomes possessed by the spirit of Merry the hobbit, starts babbling in tongues, fakes her own death, convinces numerous people who really ought to know better that she's "Jordan Wood" (in other words, Elijah Wood, complete with a magical gender-switch that, according to her besotted partner in folie-á-stupid, OrangeblossomB the webmistress of the Bit of Earth fansite, included actually physically growing a dick) that's a person who's made themselves pretty goddamned unforgettable.

And now s/he is back! First on the side of a milk carton, then busted for identity theft. (The relevant post is about halfway down the page, by "Turimel".

The suckers sheep Bit-of-Earthers are stunned and shocked to find out that their pal "Mister Frodo" was A) a woman pretending to be a man, B) a woman pretending to be a man pretending to be Elijah Wood, C) a woman pretending to be a man pretending to be Elijah Wood pretending to be Frodo, D) the sole beneficiary, along with Orangeblossom, of quite a bit of the money the site raised through various charity events.

I have the feeling that this one is just going to get better, because wank involving Victoria Bitter is never less than operatic in its scope. Mean-spirited, I sit back and enjoy.

EDIT: If you want the Cliffs Notes background to this sprawling epic o' splurt, the lovely [info]mpoetess has done an absolutely masterful job of recapping the whole ginormous bewildering tangled thing: Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, and Part Five.

It's like the Citizen Kane of wank. It's just so beautiful. *stares*

EDIT 2: No, I don't know for sure whose identity she's being charged with stealing. Right now my money's on Elijah Wood, since one of the "charity events" was supposed to have Elijah as a celebrity guest and solicited donations and sold a bunch of tickets on the strength of that. (And this is, after all, the woman who introduced herself to Sean Astin as Jordan Wood, and then roped him into being the -- very perplexed -- go-between for her "marriage proposal" to Orangeblossom.)



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[info]mpoetess
2003-12-21 05:56 am UTC (link)
*chime*

Aside from anti-slash wank, this is one of the few that I;ve actually sat at the sidelines and been at least tangentially attached to. Prefaced with -- I don't hate VB; she's never personally don'e anything to me, and I actually very much liked her when I met her. But *boy* is she a trainwreck of insanity and manipulation, based on the things that have come out.

--

Edited and condensed from the half hour of explication I ended up giving last night in chat to several friends who didn't know the saga. also, forgive please the wandering from past to presenst tense.

Victoria Bitter , henceforth VB, was something of a prodigy in LOtR fandom -- wrote stories and did art and was well-regarded, if considered a bit flakey. Previous to that she'd been in ST: Voyager and Horatio Hornblower fandoms under other names, but there was no apparent trickery going on there -- just a nickname change when moving into a new fandom.

I knew her in the friend-of-a-friend way because my bestestBuffy pals were also dabbling in LOTR, though I wasn't involved in the fandom myself. So -- April-ish 2002, shortly before ConneXions (slash convention) VB allegedly had some sort of eye infection from her bright blue (see pic in "she's missing" link in the main post) contact lenses, to the point where they thought she might lose sight in one eye. While she was in the hospital, someone got one of her drawings to Sean Astin, who (I think) signed it. That story may or may not be true - and the signing part may be true without the dangerous injury part. I'd be inclined to believe it if the later dramas hadn't unfolded; these days, a lot of people suspect it was fannish Munchausen syndrome.

(more, oh so much more)

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(Anonymous)
2003-12-30 01:24 am UTC (link)
While she was in the hospital, someone got one of her drawings to Sean Astin, who (I think) signed it. That story may or may not be true - and the signing part may be true without the dangerous injury part.

The infection was true. I have a picture of her from around that time, and her eye was still swollen. The signing is also true. I believe it was the lovely Rebecca who took Amy's (quite nice; she is talented) drawing to Sean at a bookstore signing event. Amy pretty much squeed herself into a coma when she got the signed drawing back.

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[info]mpoetess
2003-12-30 01:48 am UTC (link)
That's actually good to know -- that at least one of the nice stories VB told was just that -- a nice, true story.

FWIW, there was never any evidence to doubt that particular story that I know of, other than the web of stuff that came up later making it seem like it could have been just one more bid for attention. That and the fact that she was obviously wearing the blue contacts again as "Jordan" which made some of us wonder why she would risk them, if she'd gotten an infection from the previously.

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[info]mydarkstar
2003-12-30 10:46 am UTC (link)
That and the fact that she was obviously wearing the blue contacts again as "Jordan" which made some of us wonder why she would risk them, if she'd gotten an infection from the previously.

Probably vanity more than anything else - I, too, had a very nasty contacts-induced eye infection when I was 16, but was back to wearing them again in about a year. Of course, I actually need the things to see, rather than simply to try to more closely resemble my favourite stalking victim celebrity...

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(Anonymous)
2003-12-30 12:46 pm UTC (link)
The infection wasn't from her contacts, but because she accidentally scratched her cornea with a rough fingernail.

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(Anonymous)
2004-01-01 08:20 pm UTC (link)
The eye was infected, that much is true. She just lied to dramatize the seriousness of it (she claimed to be hospitalized for weeks, that it was expected she'd lose sight in one eye, etc etc.)

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(Anonymous)
2004-01-11 08:19 am UTC (link)
She told me on IM that she had a detached retina. When I said OMG my brother had the same thing, he almost lost his eye, the whole "you may lose the eye" started appearing in the LJ. I wonder if I inadvertently fed her information.

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