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Eyes of Azarias ([info]azarias) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2004-01-11 17:20:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:lj, taking it too seriously

Dave_the_Great and the Friendslist of Death
Friending ettiquette on LJ has always confused me. Personally, I friend who I feel like friending and only ask first if I want an excuse to start a conversation with the person I'm friending. I can't see anything they don't let me see; such is the magic of friendslock and filters. No one's complained yet, so evidently my "friending policy" hasn't yet caused any major or irreparable rips in the fabric of space-time, damn the luck.

Along comes [info]dave_the_great and his spate of randomly friending people without permission. Outrage ensues.

On the one hand, Dave's obviously doing this to get a rise out of people. On the other hand ... people are actually rising. Am I the only one who thinks it's sad that it takes so little to get the whining started? It's not even a challenge anymore.
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[info]meril
2004-01-12 01:44 am UTC (link)
Apparently people who are so concerned about being friended don't realize that our popular browsers IE and Netscape/Mozilla have had these things called "bookmarks" and "favorites" for a darn long time. IIRC, even *Mosaic* had a bookmark file.

The LJ friends list is akin to a more advanced RSS aggregator; the only difference is some level of post security and the fact that you, the journaler, can see who's reading your feed, which is impossible to find out with regular offline and online RSS aggregators.

Why are people so dumb? They use the Internet every day but don't know how the damn thing works.

(Reply to this)


[info]backfromspace
2004-01-12 01:47 am UTC (link)
You know, I have to agree with that xaoswolf person. She really is quite e-tarded.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 03:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]backfromspace, 2004-01-12 04:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2004-01-12 05:58 am UTC
RE: What are Nematodes" - [info]anglinsbees, 2004-01-12 08:35 am UTC
Re: What are Nematodes" - [info]iczer6, 2004-01-12 08:37 am UTC
Re: What are Nematodes" - [info]dejla, 2004-01-12 11:41 pm UTC

[info]eyebrowofdoom
2004-01-12 01:55 am UTC (link)
Friending whiners! My god. Nobody gains any access to anything by friending you. No privacy is lost. "Friends list" is an arbitrary item of terminology. Get a grip.

Here's a fun thing: this completely unknown person popped up on my friend-of list, so I went over to her journal to find a post saying:

"Is anyone else weireded out by people they don't know either friending them or responding to their LJ posts? People, please. I'm not bloody psychic, as much as I'd like to think otherwise. TELL me who it is."

Okay!

Actually, I've just realised there are comments links after all -- the faux-hipster styling of the journal had mislead into thinking she had comments disabled. I think I shall ask, "Is an irony intended here?"

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-01-12 02:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bohicamouse, 2004-01-12 02:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eyebrowofdoom, 2004-01-12 02:28 am UTC

[info]dana_kujan
2004-01-12 01:56 am UTC (link)
This dave_the_great seems to have the same m.o. that lj's rabblebabble had, except Rabble filled its journal with incoherent crap, which in a way I found more obnoxious than what I saw in Dave's journal. Rabble didn't even try for teh funny, just incoherency.

Anyway, I was one of the "lucky" ljers that Rabble friended on a whim. I checked out his user info; no fandom interests. I check out his lj; crap! Yeah, I was a little irked at first because I wasn't sure what the freak was up to and what his computer skills (hacking perhaps?) might be, even though I do have Norton.

To make a long story short, other Rabble "friends" took the route of the Dave "friends" you describe. I just waited him out. The journal was deleted-- I'm guessing my Rabble's own mangled hand-- about a month or so ago.

So, you're right, they just need to chill and ride out the bumpy wave.

Btw, your friending policy sounds a lot like mine.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-01-12 05:51 am UTC

[info]visp
2004-01-12 01:57 am UTC (link)
I was always flattered when people friended me. It meant I was writing about something interesting, or at least they thought I was cool or something.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mirabellawotr, 2004-01-12 02:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dunc, 2004-01-12 02:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pirotess, 2004-01-12 02:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]shoiryu, 2004-01-12 03:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pirotess, 2004-01-12 05:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]shoiryu, 2004-01-12 06:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 06:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]shoiryu, 2004-01-12 06:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pirotess, 2004-01-12 07:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]shoiryu, 2004-01-12 07:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]heyoka, 2004-01-12 05:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pirotess, 2004-01-12 05:48 am UTC
Re: - [info]visp, 2004-01-12 02:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]schoenschoen, 2004-01-12 05:34 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2004-01-12 05:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-12 06:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 06:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2004-01-12 07:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]visp, 2004-01-13 12:22 am UTC
Re: - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-13 12:36 am UTC
Re: - [info]visp, 2004-01-13 01:25 am UTC
Re: - [info]visp, 2004-01-13 12:19 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-01-15 06:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]visp, 2004-01-15 07:29 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-01-15 06:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 03:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]charabok, 2004-01-12 06:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]redpanda, 2004-01-12 10:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wolfsamurai, 2004-01-12 01:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ruaha56, 2004-01-16 12:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]msmanna, 2004-01-12 01:59 pm UTC
Re: - [info]charabok, 2004-01-12 04:29 pm UTC
Re: - [info]visp, 2004-01-13 12:07 am UTC

[info]bohicamouse
2004-01-12 02:18 am UTC (link)
I'll never understand people who get all up in arms about being randomly friended--I'd much rather people friend me than just bookmark me, so we can get to know each other. Sometimes I'll make a post about something totally random and a user I've never heard of will pop in and post a comment about how much they love it, and I wonder how the hell they found such a specific post so soon after I made it, and after a fun little conversation I never hear from them again. It's sort of depressing.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-01-12 02:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 03:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2004-01-12 04:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2004-01-12 05:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:09 am UTC

[info]wolfsamurai
2004-01-12 02:19 am UTC (link)
While I think it would be nice to be able to have some control over your Friends Of list (in my case so I could ditch my stalker), these people need to take a deep breath and chill out.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]kannaophelia, 2004-01-12 06:13 am UTC
Re: - [info]wolfsamurai, 2004-01-12 06:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]virago, 2004-01-12 04:27 pm UTC
Re: - [info]kannaophelia, 2004-01-12 06:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]virago, 2004-01-12 06:53 pm UTC
Re: - [info]kannaophelia, 2004-01-12 06:58 pm UTC

[info]necronomist
2004-01-12 02:20 am UTC (link)
The funniest part of people you don't like friending you is that you can read their self-lacerating friends-only posts.

Then again, I haven't friended anyone unless they friended me and I like their journal. *shrug*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]eyebrowofdoom, 2004-01-12 07:26 am UTC

[info]zana16
2004-01-12 03:18 am UTC (link)
It attests to my lack of maturity that my immediate impulse was to go friend [info]yrena just to annoy her further. I managed to talk myself out of it. Must not feed the stupid people.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]pepperpot, 2004-01-12 04:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tiiana, 2004-01-12 04:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]naeelah, 2004-01-12 05:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]naeelah, 2004-01-12 05:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:35 am UTC
Actually! - [info]ruaki, 2004-01-12 05:36 am UTC
Whoops! - [info]ruaki, 2004-01-12 05:38 am UTC

[info]smo
2004-01-12 03:48 am UTC (link)
What the... it just... I... *points incoherently at icon*

Does this fucking moron rocket scientist not get the concept of friends-only posting? That if you're on someone's friends list, but they're not on yours, they can only read your public posts? I can't even make a decent-looking icon, and even I figured that out without any help.

It just... I... Jesus. JAYSUS. Who ARE these people?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]azarias, 2004-01-12 04:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tiiana, 2004-01-12 04:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]naeelah, 2004-01-12 05:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladybirdsleeps, 2004-01-12 05:44 am UTC

[info]pidge
2004-01-12 04:00 am UTC (link)
Ack, accidently replied to zana16 instead of a new comment, sorry about that.

But anyway. *shrug* Maybe it is a nitpicky thing, but at least she was being polite in the first place. There's a way to flatten someone's idea without barging in pointing fingers and saying "Your friends and your mother and dog are stupid!" So yeah, I don't like when people randomly friend me either, quite honestly, and I wish I had some control over it, but it's not that big of an issue to me. This probably sounds incredibly wanky itself though.

(Reply to this)


[info]naeelah
2004-01-12 04:59 am UTC (link)
would have reported this obnoxious guy but the abuse team says adding friends is not a violation of anything :)

was she surprised?

It's funny how this girl never acknowledges the point that her journal can be read by anyone, whether or not they add her to their friend's list...

(Reply to this)


[info]kindest_demon
2004-01-12 05:00 am UTC (link)
Because I'm sad that way, of course I had to go visit this person's ohsoimportant journal to see what the fuss is about.

And it's the most boring thing on the planet. Post after post of "lala, I'm bored and like listening to myself talk."

Maybe if she can't control who friends her, she fears the world will discover how inane she really is?

*And like someone above, only the blahness of her posts keep me from friending her for sheer maliciousness*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:07 am UTC
Re: - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-12 05:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:15 am UTC
Re: - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-12 05:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:21 am UTC
Re: - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-12 05:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]naeelah, 2004-01-12 05:24 am UTC
Re: - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-12 05:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 05:46 am UTC
Re: - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-12 06:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 06:21 am UTC
Re: - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-12 06:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]naeelah, 2004-01-12 05:48 am UTC
Re: - [info]kindest_demon, 2004-01-12 06:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-01-12 06:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 06:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-01-12 06:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 06:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-01-12 06:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 06:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]schoenschoen, 2004-01-12 10:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 06:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]schoenschoen, 2004-01-12 07:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-01-12 08:11 pm UTC

[info]also_not_a_pipe
2004-01-12 06:03 am UTC (link)
This sort of thing completely baffles me.

A while ago I was friended by someone calling herself typicalemobitch. I went, I looked, I decided that her journal might be interesting for its trashy, trainwreck appeal when was in a prurient mood, but wasn't something I want to read regularly. So I didn't add her back. part of the trainwreck appeal was the number of people asking her to take them off her friends list and flipping out when she said 'no'. That mindset, it just.... gyahh. There are so many more important things in the world that they could be getting worked up over instead. Why waste the energy over something dumb like that?

I've intended a few times to post about that whole mess of a journal either here or in Blog Sociology, but I always find, when I sit down to write a post about it, that I just don't care enough to do so.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-01-12 09:40 pm UTC
Re: - [info]also_not_a_pipe, 2004-01-13 06:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sparkysrevenge, 2004-01-13 12:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-01-12 10:54 pm UTC

[info]wolfgangmozart
2004-01-12 06:04 am UTC (link)
Heh, Caminante (he/ she/ whatever) of the "rapefic writers should be raped by robots" wank and the frightening menstrual icon also expresses outrage. Am I wrong for hoping Dave answers back and brings forth more insane posts from him?

(*is a new face--hello all*)

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]schoenschoen, 2004-01-12 06:34 am UTC

[info]sajasma
2004-01-12 06:17 am UTC (link)
Oh how silly. Well over on GJ, they actually do give you the feature of removing people from your "friend of" list. It's kind of a sneaky way to remove people and most of the time they don't catch it for awhile. Still, it doesn't necessarily stop people from bookmarking your journal or constantly friending you. *shrug*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sajasma, 2004-01-12 06:18 am UTC

[info]schoenschoen
2004-01-12 06:30 am UTC (link)
Absolutely one of the funniest things I've seen today. Beautiful. *even though it *did* involve Heinrich Walker and that godawful Menstural Dreamer icon*

You know, it's always struck me as *stupid* the way that people whine when someone friends them. O_o Don't want to see it on your info page? Hide the 'friends of' list! They can't see anything you don't make public anyway, so really, what's the big deal? The only reason I defriend people that have added me is if they're dead-dull boring, or if they've moved to a different journal. And then, friends filters are made for the dead-dull boring anyway, so who *cares*?

(Reply to this)

Gee, why does this seem vaguely familiar?
[info]ymfaery
2004-01-12 09:13 am UTC (link)
I must not use my friends' list the way these people do. I see my friends' list as kind of like an enhanced bookmark list--one place to see the journals I want to read. I don't normally ask people to friend me back, and the only time where I would is if I want to comment on the person's journal and said person only allows friends to comment.
Of course, the one last time I did email someone asking to be friended for commenting purposes, not only did the person say no (to which I thought, oh well, whatever), but they got rather hostile and ultimately made said journal friends-only. >.>

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Gee, why does this seem vaguely familiar? - [info]dejla, 2004-01-12 11:58 pm UTC
Re: Gee, why does this seem vaguely familiar? - [info]hotpinkdragones, 2004-01-13 01:33 am UTC
Re: Gee, why does this seem vaguely familiar? - [info]ymfaery, 2004-01-13 02:24 am UTC

[info]sagralisse
2004-01-12 07:59 pm UTC (link)
*fangirls xaoswolf* ^_^

(Reply to this)


[info]l_s_q
2004-01-12 08:17 pm UTC (link)
There were people freaking out over bootyful_gurlay friending a large portion of the community over at mock_the_stupid recently, but I think it has been deleted.

As long as you don't friend her back to see her hideous mutilation of the English language, I don't see what the problem is.

But then, I use Earth logic.

(Reply to this)


[info]zing_och
2004-01-12 10:09 pm UTC (link)
I had a look through Dave's memories and found this.
Just. I'm ASKING you. No, I'm BEGGING YOU. Remove me and leave me alone.
I HATE TO FIGHT. I don't want to fight with you, let alone anyone. So just remove me so this can stop, PLEASE.
PLEASE. >_<;;
ad infinitum. Her keyboard may short out from all the tears. It's a thing of beauty, this thread is.
And then I look at her LJ, and her latest entry is
Just so "insertlamename", "drawkward", "ra44_mr2", and "total_static" know...
I'm not really irritated by the fact that you've randomly added me at all. I really don't find any of it as annoying.
So, yep, whatever.
Huh?

(Reply to this)


[info]virago
2004-01-12 10:10 pm UTC (link)
The runaway analogy fight amused me more than I've been amused by LJ in I don't know how long.

Ah, that was great.

(Reply to this)


[info]schuldig
2004-01-13 02:15 am UTC (link)
Yeah, someone on my flist was having a stress about it. I told her there was nothing she could do, and to calm down. Then, a few hours later, I was added too.

Personally, I don't care. Anyone can read my journal (hell, it's linked from my website!), but I don't think he IS reading it. Mostly I'm appalled that someone has so few things to be doing in their life that they're going around friending people they are completely uninterested in just to get on LJDrama. *shakes head and wanders off*

(Reply to this)


[info]jar
2004-01-13 06:37 am UTC (link)
Wow. This is so very, very stupid.

You don't have to friend people back :|.

(Reply to this)


[info]missambs
2004-01-14 10:00 am UTC (link)
*blinks*

. . .

Okay, if someone friends me? I usually friend back. It means they find me some what interesting. Yay them. I friend people randomly. Usually they friend back, sometimes they don't. If they don't? I don't care. If they do? Yay. I've never had anyone say 'take me off of your friendslist!' and if they did, I probably would just to avoid starting something. But really, what's the point of demanding someone take you off of their friendslist? You can hide your friends-of list, and you can friendslock to your heart's content. I don't understand it. It's completely pointless bitchery.

(Reply to this)
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