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La Guera ([info]laguera25) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2004-02-05 13:03:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
GAFF Wank
Somebody on Godawful makes a post expressing their disdain for a rancid HP/LOTR Suefic featuring Bronwyn, the UberSue. General mockery of the festering badness ensues.

Along comes Guest, Champion of Oppressed Sues Everywhere, who decries Gaffers for refusing to see the briiliance and artistic necessity of Sues. Obviously, anyone who criticizes a Sue has deep-seated emotional issues and is only doing so because it reminds them, on a subliminal level, of themselves.

Wank explodes.

Doublespeak, hypocrisy, thinly-veiled flames, Tolkien, and the Bible are all invoked.

Behold: Godawful Wank, Baby

(Post a new comment)


[info]sarajayechan
2004-02-05 07:34 pm UTC (link)
*sporfle*

The Sue descriptions amused me much.

(Reply to this)


[info]loki
2004-02-05 07:47 pm UTC (link)
I'm beginnig to think that Tolkien and the Bible are invoked in all of the big rants on the GAFF boards.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]aruru
2004-02-05 08:09 pm UTC (link)
Maybe there should be a special law applicable only to the GAFF forums?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-05 08:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2004-02-05 08:42 pm UTC

(Reply from suspended user)
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-05 09:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]coyotegirl, 2004-02-06 06:53 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-06 04:31 pm UTC
Re: - [info]coyotegirl, 2004-02-06 07:07 pm UTC

[info]alpheratz
2004-02-05 08:31 pm UTC (link)
There was a wank on deleterius involving the same author and a bunch of her sockpuppets not that long ago. Sadly, I can't seem to find the link.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]theartema
2004-02-05 08:46 pm UTC (link)
mmm, I remember that.

She pretty much declared the OP a whiny bitch and that everything she said was false and brought on by jealousy and that we were all retarded high-schoolers who had no imagination, no hope, no future, omgwerbadpplz1!!1eleventy-one

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]anon_3point5, 2004-02-05 11:02 pm UTC
Re: - [info]theartema, 2004-02-05 11:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]erik, 2004-02-05 11:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]theartema, 2004-02-05 11:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2004-02-06 01:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]theartema, 2004-02-06 02:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nyoda, 2004-02-06 11:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jezrana, 2004-02-06 07:29 am UTC
Here ya' go
(Anonymous)
2004-02-05 08:50 pm UTC (link)
http://www.livejournal.com/community/deleterius/360372.html

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]smo
2004-02-05 08:55 pm UTC (link)
Why waste time reading about imperfect charactrers, when I can enjoy reading about a perfect one instead?

You mean, those imperfect, flawed characters the author made up?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]eljuno
2004-02-05 08:57 pm UTC (link)
Oh I MISSED that one.

How's this for an answer. Perfection == boring?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-02-05 09:24 pm UTC

[info]alpheratz
2004-02-05 09:13 pm UTC (link)
Why waste time reading about imperfect charactrers, when I can enjoy reading about a perfect one instead?

O_o I can't believe this is for real.

Why don't you have a go at a genre that deserves to be stopped, like shipping? There are good Sue stories out there, but there's no such thing as a good shipping story.

Tee hee hee.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-02-05 09:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2004-02-05 09:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mooncalf, 2004-02-05 10:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2004-02-06 04:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mooncalf, 2004-02-06 04:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-02-06 08:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mooncalf, 2004-02-06 10:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-02-06 10:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mooncalf, 2004-02-06 10:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-02-06 01:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pradaloz, 2004-02-05 09:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladysorka, 2004-02-05 10:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]beccastareyes, 2004-02-06 02:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chash, 2004-02-06 02:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-02-06 07:50 pm UTC

[info]sagralisse
2004-02-05 09:01 pm UTC (link)
Well, you have to give her some cred for hanging in there and debating rationally... I guess.

But then again, holy smack! Her ideal LOTR is going to give nightmares.

Bitch, please... just put the put the Fantasy genre down and step away slowly. Don't make any sudden moves -- I don't want to have to kill you.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]visp, 2004-02-05 11:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jezrana, 2004-02-06 06:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-06 05:52 pm UTC

rum_tum_tum
2004-02-05 10:02 pm UTC (link)
And then the Sue-Defender begins using both hands in an attempt to keep with the wank that he started.

In my opinion, perfect characters absent all of flaw are tasteless and lack decent character, b/c character is obtained through development - through their praiseworthy qualities and doings of right and good as well as their mistakes and imperfections. I know we're all imperfect as human beings and someone who's perfect may easily fascinate us, but hey. I find an imperfect being who is able to rise above his flaws and overcome his obstacles to be that much more entertaining, endearing, and admirable. To me, that is what makes a person beautiful. With everything being predictable along with the knowing that it all will turn out well, it would definitely cut down on the anxiety, stress, and fear of failing. But... Where's the good ol' fashioned fun and beauty of iron-hard determination in that?

This is certainly the wankiest Mary Sue wank that I've read in a long time.

(Reply to this)


[info]eiviiaru
2004-02-05 10:11 pm UTC (link)
Ah, that's our Bronwyn, wanking so hard and so frequently it's a miracle she doesn't die of dehydration.

Okay, I'll confess: I occasionally enjoy reading well-done Sueish fiction about strong, even overly strong, characters. But what gets me about Bronwyn is that she's "perfect" only in irritatingly weak ways -- sure, she can sing and sass dragons and such, but ultimately she's only important in who she fucks and the children she has. This is our feminine paragon? God, give me Marrissa any damn day of the week.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-02-05 10:31 pm UTC
Miaka - [info]deoridhe, 2004-02-05 10:32 pm UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]smo, 2004-02-05 10:43 pm UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]deoridhe, 2004-02-05 11:16 pm UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]arielchan, 2004-02-05 11:25 pm UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]deoridhe, 2004-02-06 01:52 am UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]shoiryu, 2004-02-06 01:12 am UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]deoridhe, 2004-02-06 01:53 am UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]smo, 2004-02-06 08:46 pm UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]deoridhe, 2004-02-07 05:47 pm UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]pipssister, 2004-02-05 11:39 pm UTC
Re: Miaka - [info]deoridhe, 2004-02-06 01:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2004-02-05 10:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-02-05 10:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eiviiaru, 2004-02-06 01:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2004-02-06 01:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2004-02-06 05:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-05 10:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]alyse, 2004-02-05 10:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bubba_ray, 2004-02-05 10:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-02-05 11:03 pm UTC
Re: - [info]bubba_ray, 2004-02-05 11:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-05 11:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-05 11:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - pooka, 2004-02-06 01:13 am UTC
(no subject) - pooka, 2004-02-06 01:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-06 02:46 am UTC
Re: - pooka, 2004-02-06 02:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-06 02:47 am UTC
(no subject) - pooka, 2004-02-06 02:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-06 03:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lulufallsdown, 2004-02-06 07:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-06 10:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-06 02:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eiviiaru, 2004-02-06 01:13 am UTC
Oh, come on. - [info]htrismegistus, 2004-02-06 05:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sewingmyfish, 2004-02-06 05:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]htrismegistus, 2004-02-06 09:26 am UTC
Re: Oh, come on. - [info]dragonfangirl, 2004-02-06 02:34 pm UTC
Re: Oh, come on. - [info]htrismegistus, 2004-02-07 05:39 am UTC
Re: Oh, come on. - [info]dragonfangirl, 2004-02-11 04:08 pm UTC
Re: Oh, come on. - [info]eiviiaru, 2004-02-06 04:32 pm UTC
Re: Oh, come on. - [info]htrismegistus, 2004-02-07 05:43 am UTC
Re: Oh, come on. - [info]kijikun, 2004-02-06 07:47 pm UTC
Re: Oh, come on. - [info]htrismegistus, 2004-02-07 05:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dae, 2004-02-05 11:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-02-05 11:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dae, 2004-02-05 11:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-06 12:10 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-06 03:59 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-05 11:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-05 11:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2004-02-06 03:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eiviiaru, 2004-02-06 01:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-06 01:39 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-06 02:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-06 03:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nights_mistress, 2004-02-06 07:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]diamonde, 2004-02-06 12:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sagralisse, 2004-02-06 02:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kookaburra, 2004-02-07 06:06 am UTC

(Reply from suspended user)

[info]kijikun
2004-02-05 11:01 pm UTC (link)
Ah it Zee, I remember her. Her and her sockpuppets through a fit at Deletruis

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]esseilte, 2004-02-06 01:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-02-06 01:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]liarliar, 2004-02-06 07:40 am UTC

[info]bunny
2004-02-06 12:02 am UTC (link)
Ah, now here we're getting to the root of you're problem. The desire to "slap the crap" out of someone is not a good thiung. You clearly have some sort issues. Maybe you need anger management courses or something like that? But don't blame someone else's fictional characters for your real-life problems.

Come on people - the "you hate something, I love, means that you are a nutcase need help" stuff - is classic jurisimprudence material.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]firedragon1234, 2004-02-06 04:23 am UTC

[info]missambs
2004-02-06 01:26 am UTC (link)
Why don't you have a go at a genre that deserves to be stopped, like shipping? There are good Sue stories out there, but there's no such thing as a good shipping story.

'Cause you just know the author of that comment has read every single story dealing with every single 'ship in every single fandom.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - allen, 2004-02-06 04:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lulufallsdown, 2004-02-06 07:13 pm UTC

[info]psychofangirl
2004-02-06 01:38 am UTC (link)
"And the more perfect the Sue, the better the story. Why waste time reading about imperfect charactrers, when I can enjoy reading about a perfect one instead? There's no contest. Perfect characters make better reading every time."

Is this person on crack?

Whatever...to each his own. Odd OOC Ships can at least have imperfect, interesting characters. Can't say the same for Mary Sues.

(Reply to this)


[info]squib
2004-02-06 03:00 am UTC (link)
I nominate Elizabeth Haydon's uber-annoying Rhapsody

(Reply to this)


[info]jezrana
2004-02-06 04:42 am UTC (link)
Why waste time reading about imperfect charactrers, when I can enjoy reading about a perfect one instead? There's no contest. Perfect characters make better reading every time.

Yeah, who wants to read about realistic characters you can identify with, struggling to overcome their flaws and triumph against the odds? BORING!

(Reply to this)


[info]croik
2004-02-06 05:30 am UTC (link)
What I don't get is how she can say they don't like fics that are poorly written or OOC (like "shipping"), but...she likes Sues...?

Isn't part of being a Sue warping canon characters and poor writing?

'Cause if everyone was in character and the original was well written...that wouldn't be a sue. It'd be an original.

*is questioning her ability to judge "in-characterness"*

(Reply to this)


[info]musette
2004-02-06 08:02 am UTC (link)
I just... grrargh! How is a perfect character supposed to have any arc or any development? How is there any dramatic tension? How is there any reason to want to keep reading the fucking story?? *headdesk*

(Reply to this)

nominations
(Anonymous)
2004-02-06 08:37 am UTC (link)
It's not SF or FF but Eponine from Les Miserables is my a-nonny-moose nomination. Too many yowling, angst-saturated dumbdumbs have made her their poster child. And somehow she always manages to look pretty even though she's supposed to be malnourished, slightly demented and bereft of proper dental hygiene.

"She gave her life for the man she loved!"

Yeah, that helps when you're dead.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: nominations - (Anonymous), 2004-02-06 07:19 pm UTC

(Anonymous)
2004-02-06 11:08 am UTC (link)
I actually feel sorry for Zeedrippyvessel. I mean, how much self-hate must she have IRL if she needs to escape into overblown fantasies of Sue-perfection so badly? Now, if she was in middle school, I could somehow understand it; but she's in her thirties and has a kid. *shakes head*

Devi (ravenclaw_devi on LJ)

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-02-06 02:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eiviiaru, 2004-02-06 04:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2004-02-06 05:18 pm UTC

[info]pradaloz
2004-02-06 06:02 pm UTC (link)
In response to a GAFFer's request that she pick a username and stick with it (to cut down on the confusion), our little Sue fan writes:

People? So far there only seems to be one of me. Sorry if the changing names is a bit confusing, but I hate the restriction of being tied down to only one screen-name. You know how it is; you end up hating your net persona as much as you hate your real-life self.

I, um. Wow. That's really kind of sad. No wonder she's so attached to that perfect, sooper-speshul version of herself.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-06 10:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-02-11 04:05 pm UTC
Joy!
(Anonymous)
2004-02-07 02:34 am UTC (link)
Oh, joy! The GAFF fourum has now been visited by the author herself! QUIVER WITH FEAR! Or don't...

--Hekima

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Joy! - [info]seventy_three, 2004-02-07 03:05 am UTC

  
   
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