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The Other Dubya ([info]misswindy) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2004-03-10 00:05:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
It's a Conspiracy! A C-O-N...spiracy!
I've donned full body armor and done some lurking at the official RubenStuddard.com message boards. Just in case y'all don't follow the Idol fandom, Ruben was the (some say dubious) winner of the second season of American Idol, but has since been outsold by the runner up, Clay Aiken, at a ratio of about 3:1. Ruben's also recently tried to launch a concert tour, which has been an embarrassing failure thus far. This on the heels of a successful Clay/Kelly Clarkson tour. I knew if I wandered over to his official MB, I'd immediately find bitter, bitter splooge. And they didn't disappoint!

Fun facts about the fan culture over there: They refer to Clay Aiken as **** because they don't want to see his name in print, they think Kim Locke, who placed third place in the competition and now lives with Clay, is a white-guy-worshipping sell out, and they generally just seem to exist in a huge river of bitter bile toward anyone remotely connected to the American Idol machine. It's a wank extravaganza! To wit:

Ryan Seacrest is an asshat h8er because he mentioned Clay and Kelly on his show and had the unmitigated GALL to not talk about Ruben!!!11!twelve!!

The Ruben board should be for RUBEN LOVE ONLY! If you do not LOVE Ruben, and if you can't show him respect then don't post on here on his fan board. It is that simple!!! posted by someone who has named themselves after a line of cheap haircare products!

Ryan Seacrest is only h8ing because he's mad that everyone thinks he's ****'s sorry homosexual gay luvah! posted unironically by someone named gaye carey!

ST3P 0FF!1!! Ryan is a sweetheart! After all, he supports Michael Jackson. Doesn't that say something? also posted unironically!

Check out the whole thread, all 40 wankadelic posts or so and see:

- The two or three "Can't we all just get along" types get accused of being sekrit jellis Ruben-hating ****mates
- Clay's fan base be characterized as consisting BOTH entirely of "old fat 50something cows" *and* "nothing but 5th-8th graders"
- Multiple jurisimprudence laws in effect, often within the same post
- Every other post typed all in caps and/or with complete disregard for punctuation and/or in l33tsp34k

Then, if you're really brave, you'll make it over to the rest of the board. *shudder*

(Post a new comment)


[info]cleolinda
2004-03-10 08:10 am UTC (link)
Whoa, you mean Kim Locke lives with-lives with Clay Aiken? That astonishes me for some reason.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]misswindy
2004-03-10 08:26 am UTC (link)
Kim Locke lives with-lives with Clay Aiken?

I don't know. It's possible. They deny that they're anything but friends, but they're both from reeeeeally conservative families who would absolutely go publically apeshit if they lived-lived together. They definitely ARE roommates. They moved in together last summer after the AI2 tour ended and have been living together ever since.

It's true that Kim L. hasn't had much good to say with regard to Ruben's career either. She's definitely Clay's biggest cheerleader and always has been: the day after the finale, for example, she was on the phone with the Washington Post all "Clay wuz robbed!!1!" and telling anyone who'd listen that the production team of the show had made it CLEAR that they wanted a Clay-Ruben finale and Ruben as the winner from the get-go. I interviewed Trenyce 2 months ago, and she said that was absolutely true. Kim has implied pretty much any time she gets the chance that she thinks the whole thing was rigged.

It's a big ugly *thing*, honestly. And no, I don't just mean Randy Jackson.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]cleolinda
2004-03-10 08:29 am UTC (link)
I just think of Clay Aiken as being completely asexual, is why it surprises me... I think. And I can totally believe that it was rigged. I guess I just wonder why they fixated on Ruben, of all people.

And you know what the worst part is? I also represent the 205. Thanks for making everyone hate us with your stupid jerseys, Ruben.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]misswindy, 2004-03-10 08:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2004-03-10 08:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilgmbethy, 2004-03-10 09:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2004-03-10 09:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilgmbethy, 2004-03-10 09:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]misswindy, 2004-03-10 09:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]guinevere33, 2004-03-11 04:51 am UTC

[info]mariagoner
2004-03-10 07:01 pm UTC (link)
It's true that Kim L. hasn't had much good to say with regard to Ruben's career either. She's definitely Clay's biggest cheerleader and always has been: the day after the finale, for example, she was on the phone with the Washington Post all "Clay wuz robbed!!1!" and telling anyone who'd listen that the production team of the show had made it CLEAR that they wanted a Clay-Ruben finale and Ruben as the winner from the get-go.

Woah, KLo actually thinks that? I thought she, Clay and Ruben were actually supposed to be one happy family, so I'm incredibly surprised to hear that apparently she has it out for the big guy. (Or, at the very least, is so slanted towards Clay, to the point where she seems like she has it in for the big guy.

Guess the "one big happy AI family" shtick has more holes in it than appeared...

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]loonylupinlover
2004-03-10 08:55 am UTC (link)
HEY!

Citre-Shine is a damn good haircare line. :-P

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]misswindy
2004-03-10 08:57 am UTC (link)
Good enough to name yourself after them? DO YOU SEE ME CALLING MYSELF PAULMITCHELLPANTENE?

I rest my case.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]loonylupinlover
2004-03-10 11:29 am UTC (link)
Awww, but it's so very catchy! Or, um, well, not. :-P True, Citre-Shine's amazing ability to tame my frizzy hair is not the first thing I'd think of in crafting an online persona....

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-03-11 05:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-03-11 05:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-03-11 05:49 pm UTC
Re: - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-03-11 05:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-03-11 05:57 pm UTC
Re: - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-03-11 06:16 pm UTC
Hmmmm...
[info]pfeffermuse
2004-03-10 09:00 am UTC (link)
I can proudly say I've only seen AI once, and that was while stuck in a hospital waiting room.

But I'm not sure I can take any AI fandom seriously after William Hung.

Hey, everyone's entitled to their fifteen minutes, but when it starts bordering on an hour, it's time to get out the sporks.

Pepper

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Hmmmm...
[info]misswindy
2004-03-10 09:41 am UTC (link)
I'm not sure I can take any AI fandom seriously after William Hung.

In our defense, most of AI fandom doesn't take William Hung seriously. If you check out any AI message board, everyone is absolutely sick of him and hopes he falls into the nearest woodchipper.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Hmmmm...
[info]mariagoner
2004-03-10 07:03 pm UTC (link)
And yet AI keeps pimpin' and pimpin' and pimpin' the little weasel on... ::sigh::

That's the worst thing about AI. They always take an initially amusing, titillating or enjoyable thing, and then either pimp (Ruben, Hung) or smother (Trenyyyyyyyyyyyce!) it to death. They can never let the damn things alone, trusting it to do well enough by itself.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: Hmmmm...
[info]pfeffermuse
2004-03-11 04:35 am UTC (link)
To show you how far out of the loop I am about AI...when my boss was talking about him, and he asked me if I'd visited his website, I thought it had to be a joke. Anyone with a name (and as I heard it) "Well Hung" had to be a porno star, and you don't check out erotic sites at the workplace.

As they say, you learn something new every day.

Pepper

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]mynxkittie
2004-03-10 09:28 am UTC (link)
They can't even spell out Clay's name? Is he G-d all of a sudden?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]misswindy
2004-03-10 09:39 am UTC (link)
They can't even spell out Clay's name? Is he G-d all of a sudden?

No, it's that they hate seeing his name in print so much that they just replace it with asterisks. They also call the Claymate fans "Claymites."

But theirs is a board of "addictive positivity!" Because of Ruben's appeal and... um. "humbleness."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]mynxkittie
2004-03-10 09:52 am UTC (link)
Yeah, I guessed as much. I was just making a joke as to how it resembles the need to spell out God as G-d for some religions 'cause of the whole "anything with the word God on it is instantly scared". Oh well. :)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]misswindy, 2004-03-10 10:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ehann, 2004-03-10 04:07 pm UTC
Gratuitous Icon Love Post - [info]smo, 2004-03-10 06:22 pm UTC

[info]phosfate
2004-03-11 10:40 pm UTC (link)
Huh. If they'd given it any thought, they'd call them "Claymidia."

(Reply to this)(Parent)

(Reply from suspended user)

[info]misswindy
2004-03-10 06:23 pm UTC (link)
The irony of him posting about how they 'never get into embittered arguments' as the whole post explodes in splooge has floored me.

Isn't it grand! I like the guy who was posting about the board's "addictive love" and then later splooged bitterly for 3 paragraphs about how Clay's fans are too wanky to be allowed to live. And there's the guy who was all "If ****'s fans stopped lurking around here so much, they might actually be able to get something done for him!" I was like, what, buy 3 million more albums?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]judyhazeleyes
2004-03-10 06:58 pm UTC (link)
the whole **** thing is a riot. i mean, my friends and i used to pretend we were unable to speak the names of our favourite musicians's girlfriends - fiona became Fffff, sandra became Sssss, etc -

- WHEN WE WERE 13 YEARS OLD.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-03-11 04:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-03-11 05:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2004-03-11 05:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-03-11 05:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2004-03-11 05:44 pm UTC

[info]mariagoner
2004-03-10 07:06 pm UTC (link)
Ruben was the (some say dubious) winner of the second season of American Idol...

But not you, eh? Of course not... :P

And just think... both Ruben and Clay fans apparently bring the crazy. Are KLo's fans any better? Will we get an update on her wanky message boards in the future?


And as an aside... how much money have Ruben and Clay made off the AI bandwagon? Are they both millionares by now? Or has the AI machine taken away every red cent that they earned, and placed them in the demonic pocket of Uncle Nigel?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]misswindy
2004-03-10 07:38 pm UTC (link)
both Ruben and Clay fans apparently bring the crazy.

Yes, without a doubt, they both bring the crazy, the delusional, the paranoid, and the over-the-top extreme. But only Ruben's fans bring the denial and the deep, deep bitter. Also, teh homophobia.

Are KLo's fans any better? Will we get an update on her wanky message boards in the future?

I'll keep an eye out, but no, Kim's fans are a cheery little lot thus far. They're happy she's the only second-runner up to get promotion AND a record contract. She may prove to be at least as successful as Ruben, too - her single is getting a lot of buzz, and she smartly included a duet with Clay on the album, which her boy has been pimping to all his fans on his tour and singing it with his back up singer, thereby ensuring that everyone will buy her album at least just for that song.

KellyClarksonExpress has a lot of anti-Clay obsessing and paranoid plot theorizing though. And all nine of Justin Guarini's fans have quite the effluvious spleens!

And as an aside... how much money have Ruben and Clay made off the AI bandwagon? Are they both millionares by now? Or has the AI machine taken away every red cent that they earned, and placed them in the demonic pocket of Uncle Nigel?

I don't know at all. They all got million-dollar contracts but the specifics have never been disclosed. Clay gives most of it away to his autism awareness charity, though, and he and Kim live quite modestly in LA. Whether that's by choice or because they're both still poor, I'm not sure. I think it's mostly by choice though.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]mariagoner
2004-03-10 07:55 pm UTC (link)
I don't know at all. They all got million-dollar contracts but the specifics have never been disclosed. Clay gives most of it away to his autism awareness charity, though, and he and Kim live quite modestly in LA. Whether that's by choice or because they're both still poor, I'm not sure. I think it's mostly by choice though.

Awwwwwwww. The boy may look like the muppet on steroids and overenunciate his RRRs, but he's got a heart of gold in him.

And as for Kim and Clay... anybody else get the idea that they might be more than just "room mates"? I mean... they live together, talk about each other all the time, and endlessly promote each other's careers. Personally, I think they're boinking the hell out of each other at every chance possible, while using his apparent asexuality and her conservatism as a smokescreen.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]misswindy, 2004-03-10 08:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mariagoner, 2004-03-10 09:05 pm UTC

[info]misswindy
2004-03-10 07:39 pm UTC (link)
PS CLAY WUZ ROBBED!!!11!!!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]mariagoner
2004-03-10 07:56 pm UTC (link)
Dude. Fer real!

(Reply to this)(Parent)

(no subject) - [info]jfpbookworm, 2004-03-10 08:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]misswindy, 2004-03-10 08:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-03-11 05:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]misswindy, 2004-03-11 05:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-03-11 06:00 pm UTC
Maybe it's certain biases shining through, but...
[info]tiasian
2004-03-11 08:01 am UTC (link)
I feel rather bad for the Ruben Stoddard fans.

I've been a fan of characters that fangirls don't exactly tend to flock towards before...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Maybe it's certain biases shining through, but...
[info]tiasian
2004-03-11 08:04 am UTC (link)
And speaking of “COMMEN DECENCY” how decent of you is it to come to a Ruben fan board with a name of “canadianclaymate”. Miss I have witnessed some major trouble making on your part on this website and I don't appreciate it. I come here to hear about Ruben and whatever else it is that TRUE RUBEN fans want to talk about because I am interested in what THEY have to say, I appreciate their honest and rational opinions. I never see any Ruben fans bombarding the Clay boards with names like "USARubenite". Now, why don't you take your own advice and show COMMEN DECENCY and leave a place where you are being a major troublemaker. I don't think you'd treat a person on the street this way.

... okay, not feeling so sorry anymore.

(admittedly, I don't have much context for either of the opinions I've expressed but still!)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Maybe it's certain biases shining through, but... - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-03-11 05:46 pm UTC

  
   
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