Current mood:

*sporfle!*

My...lutzes bring all the boys to the yard??
More from the wonderful world of ~~WTF?~~ figure skating fans, this time up to their crazy hijinks at FoxSports.Net and the "Girl Next Door" poll.

For those of you who didn't know or care, "The Girl Next Door" is a movie that came out Friday the 9th about a teenage boy's ultimate fantasy, that an amazingly good-looking former porn star comes to live next door to him and has lots of her friends and erstwhile colleagues along for good clean suggestive fun before falling truly in love with him. And of course, since one testosterone-driven pursuit deserves another, the good people at FoxSports.Net decided to have their very own "Girl Next Door" poll for which female athlete you wish would move in next door. It's set up in sort of a "playoff" style, where you can vote for your fave vs. one other hottie, the winner of which goes up against the next one, and.

The sploodge begins when Michelle Kwan and Sasha Cohen are among the nominees for this prestigous award. And rabid fans being rabid fans, well. It proceeds to get ugly very quickly.

"wheeee. The poll just started today, and there are alreday over 35,000 votes in the MK vs Sasha poll compared to just under 10,000 in the other poll."

Alas, the FOX site apparently isn't showing numbers of votes any more now that the poll is over, but the cynical soul who forecasted 300,000--that's right, 300,000 votes--was actually underestimating by about 65,000 votes.

In the thread above, there are accusations of ballot-stuffing (gee, you think?), which seem to be borne out by this thread at SashaFans.com and the many, many brightly-colored text entries "com on gurlz we hav 2 keep Sashie at #1!!!!1!!!!!!!" as well as this one at the Fans of Michelle Kwan forums, where tips and tricks for doing the same are exchanged. But the gem here is a poster by the name of Fumbilicious who is apparently both clueless and irony-deficient...:

I just voted and noticed that Trish Stratus from the WWE is in there too. Why is she even in that poll? She looks far from being the girl next door, more like the porno girl next door.

A couple posts down, it gets gently pointed out to her that that is EXACTLY what they're voting on, along with some sour grapes...

Fumbilicious, "The Girl Next Door" movie is sponsoring this poll. It is about a porn star next door that goes out with a boy that doesn't know she is a porn star and finds out. I am not sure I want MK to be known as the girl next door if that is what they are trying to say.

Slapfight erupts on page 5 of the above thread:

Sashafans arn't rigging the votes! Stop accusing us of those things! We are just more loyal to Sasha and know just like Sasha who wants to win we want to help her win at things we can control! SO STOP ACCUSING US OF CHEATING!

Nobody said you were, but somebody is. The telltale sign of automatic computer voting is that there are exactly 27 votes being cast every second. Whenever I try to beat a computer, the computer always wins

Anybody, which jurisimprudence law is this, where you dismiss somebody's fannish one-upmanship with the 'it's just FANDOM, not IMPORTANT stuff?'

Most of sasha's fans that post there are between the ages of 12-16 and can afford to sit on the computer all day and vote. me? I had easter crap to do today, and the Girl Next Door poll was teh last thing on my mind. Seriously, it is not like this is a poll to save Michelle's life or anything

And a variant on that theme...

Someone posted Michelle would be remembered for being an Olympic Champion and not a fox poll. Well excuse me for wondering, but since when did Michelle win the olympics?!? Thank you that never happened and probably won't so please don't say that, it is false information.

well...she's a hell of a lot closer then you will ever be, so we will leave it at that. someday, when you grow up skatergurl, you will realize that there are many things more important in life then the fox poll and sasha cohen always winning it. i hope so anyways.

Sour grapes, anyone?

Once the Sasha Brigade vanquished the Kwan Commandos, they turned their efforts towards sabotaging the Hingis/Stratus matchup, which alas, availed them naught. so, amidst much uncomplimentary kvetching about the winner, including making fun of her name and comparing her to a Barbie doll, OMGCONSPIRACY!

Umm... there wasn't a final round - they just seem to have posted the person they wanted to win.

Currently (still letting people vote??? Why???):

66% Sasha Cohen
34% - Michelle Kwan
52% - Trish Stratus
48% - Martina Hingis

http://www.foxsports.com/content/view?contentId=2306334
http://www.foxsports.com/content/view?contentId=2306334

Either:

-someone doesn't know how to count
-this poll was screwed up since it began, or last week at the least (notice the amount of broken links and lack of publicity on the main page, etc.)
-some other reason?

I dunno, but I'm going to be up late thinking about THAT one. Sheesh, with the blatant hypocrisy "OMG this contest is soooooooooo fixed 'cause we had SO MANY MORE FAKE VOTES THAN THEM!!!!1!!"

(Post a new comment)

	elijahdprophet 2004-04-13 09:51 pm UTC (link)
	wow, rabid sportsfan wank, AND ballot stuffing wank. Online voting is always a riot. I didnt realize that there were so many non fanfic/boyband related INSANE fangirls out there. man, mocking these ppl iZ tEh PwN! [/irony] (Reply to this)

rubytramp
2004-04-13 09:56 pm UTC (link)

I *heart* meaningless on-line poll wank!

Squeee!

Sashafans arn't rigging the votes! Stop accusing us of those things! We are just more loyal to Sasha and know just like Sasha who wants to win we want to help her win at things we can control! SO STOP ACCUSING US OF CHEATING!

Yeah! They know 'just like Sasha who wants to win' and 'help her win at things we can control' but they 'are't' voting 67908000000 gazillion times.

*Sits back, gets Doritos (TM), and enjoys watching this wank for the rest of the afternoon*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	mariagoner 2004-04-14 02:31 am UTC (link)
	Yeah! They know 'just like Sasha who wants to win' and 'help her win at things we can control' but they 'are't' voting 67908000000 gazillion times Do these people actually think her winning or losing the poll concerns her in any way whatsoever? Seriously now. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	michiru 2004-04-14 02:57 am UTC (link)
	you didn't know that all GOOD professional sports figures (as well as many actors and television chefs) troll online message boards for the next poll outcome?? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	mariagoner 2004-04-14 02:58 am UTC (link)
	Wow. It's true. You can learn something new everyday, if you hang around the fandom. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ashenmote 2004-04-14 11:09 pm UTC (link)
	Ah, but doesn't it take dauntless ambition and overarching resolve to succeed as Ice Princess? Her true fans know by heart that this must also extend to winning Miss-Hairy-Legs-Championships and Courtney-Love-of-2004-Contests on the internet. Seriously, I guess it is just sort of a collective sugar high. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	crickets 2004-04-14 06:12 am UTC (link)
	I keep misreading the name as Slashafans. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	ashenmote 2004-04-14 08:10 pm UTC (link)
	I too, I too! Wait...shouldn't it be Femslashafans, in this case? (Reply to this)(Parent)

	meril 2004-04-13 10:22 pm UTC (link)
	Arrrgh, teenies. Too dumb to figure out "this poll is not for you." I don't think those particular skaters are on the "I'd hit it" list of most people who fancy women, either, so WTF? (Reply to this)

	darkwitch666 2004-04-13 10:23 pm UTC (link)
	Won't someone think of the Antichrist? (Reply to this)(Thread)

	kijikun 2004-04-13 10:29 pm UTC (link)
	No. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	darkwitch666 2004-04-13 10:34 pm UTC (link)
	I was just sayin'. ;) (Reply to this)(Parent)

	dogatemysocks 2004-04-14 12:38 am UTC (link)
	fangirls your icon That is all. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	panthea 2004-04-14 12:07 am UTC (link)
	Did anyone else see that Sports Night ep? 'Cause, yeah. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	liarliar 2004-04-14 02:49 am UTC (link)
	Great thinking on his part, that was. You write this program to vote for me 23973296723 times an hour. No one'll catch on at all. ;) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	allison 2004-04-14 08:41 pm UTC (link)
	Dude! Guybrush Threepwood?! hearts (Reply to this)(Parent)

*starts up the beat*

byagghametta
2004-04-14 04:27 am UTC (link)

My lutzes bring all the boys to the rink,
And they're like, it's better than yours
Damn right, they're better than yours
I could teach you, but I'd have to charge

My lutzes bring all the boys to the rink,
And they're like, it's better than yours
Damn right, they're better than yours
I could teach you, but I'd have to charge

you know they want it,
the spins that make me,
all the judges crazy for,
I spin so fine
in leotards
I think it's time

la la la la la
spin around
la la la la la
the boys are waiting
la la la la la
the toe pick
la la la la la
the boys are waiting

*dances*

(Reply to this)