	It's spreading sniff ruaha56 2004-05-08 05:07 am UTC (link)
	'Tis truly a thing of beauty. Crystal would be so proud. The manips are quite well done, though. I wish she'd use her photoshopping skills for better things. But wait, then there'd be no stupid. Don't mind me sweetie - go on, go on. (Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: It's spreading *sniff* - (Anonymous), 2004-05-08 05:08 am UTC

	smit 2004-05-08 05:09 am UTC (link)
	Is this where we all break out our MY HED IZ PASTEDE ON YAY! icons? Cause here's mine. I forgot who made it though, so tell me and I'll credit. Because it is a thing of beauty. (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - meshou, 2004-05-08 05:12 am UTC

(no subject) -

madamotaku, 2004-05-08 05:22 am UTC

(no subject) -

cleolinda, 2004-05-08 06:03 am UTC

(no subject) -

xeno4eyes, 2004-05-10 06:11 pm UTC

(no subject) -

greekhoop, 2004-05-08 08:45 am UTC

(no subject) -

erik, 2004-05-08 07:49 pm UTC

(no subject) -

munchkinott, 2004-05-09 01:58 am UTC

elfy
2004-05-08 05:12 am UTC (link)

O.o WTF is with that "picture" at the bottom with Viggo - and the one above it??? Everything is really badly pastede on yay!

Her nose has been broke 7 times

I've been broke a lot. Being a poor student does that. but in saying that, I don't know that my nose personally has been broke... I think the whole not having money thing was an entire body experience...

The two often person to be one another.

And again in English? O.o

Their appearance is so alike, their own mother cant tell them apart,

Erm.

In July of 2003 Maria attended the Pirates of the Carribean Premier with cousin, Sophia Coppola, Mother Monica Bellucci, Aunt Laura Herring, Aunt Constance Marie Lopez, and Sister Luisa Lopez, Which is where she met Orlando Bloom, and where sister Luisa began a relation ship with Elijah Wood, 23.

AHAHAAHAAHAHAHAHAAHA. Poor little Lij.

after a dispute with Bloom while in London for Christmas shortly after New Years, Maria was seen at the Golden Globes with none other than Mortensen on her arm. Shortly after she moved in with him, at his Montana ranch west of Missoula.

In March after a reconciliation with Bloom, the couple was expecting their first child in September of 2004, Shortly after 3 more months of UN commitment on Bloom's part Lopez called off the relationship, and moved back in with sister Maria.
But then moved back with Orlando after he promised that he was ready for commitment with Maria and his daughter.

Uh... if this baby was actually real, would they even be able to tell what sex it would be?

Doesn't like to talk about her past relation ships.

Commenting on her relationships, MQ Magazine 2004.</i>

BUT OMG I DUN LIKE 2 TALK ABOUT MY PAST RELATIONSHIPSES! COS THAT WOULD BE BAD!!11

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - nakannimi, 2004-05-08 06:37 am UTC

(no subject) -

elfy, 2004-05-08 06:43 am UTC

(no subject) -

pipssister, 2004-05-08 12:51 pm UTC

(no subject) -

kookaburra, 2004-05-10 08:14 am UTC

(no subject) -

elfy, 2004-05-10 08:49 am UTC

	muzivitch 2004-05-08 05:13 am UTC (link)
	Is the University of Harvard some new institution I hadn't heard of? I must be out of the loop again. (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

hermiones_hymen, 2004-05-08 08:15 am UTC

(no subject) -

elijahdprophet, 2004-05-09 06:37 am UTC

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-11 05:44 am UTC

	tami_brown 2004-05-08 05:13 am UTC (link)
	Wow.....the delusion factor is running high with this chick. Please tell me she's not serious about all of that, that its just a joke......because my poor, deluded mind refuses to accept there are people THAT psycho out there. (Reply to this)

	marginalsanity 2004-05-08 05:21 am UTC (link)
	whimper (Reply to this)

	khym_chanur 2004-05-08 05:35 am UTC (link)
	Meh. Even to my untrained eye, they look like manips, whereas Crystal's stuff looks like the real thing if you don't know what you're looking for. (Reply to this)

	alina_kalime 2004-05-08 05:47 am UTC (link)
	I'm not a surgeon, but for someone who has supposedly broken her nose seven times, and then had several reconstructive surguries to fix that, it's in pristine condition, along with her posture (which may have been damaged with her back), and has no visible scars. Obligatory icon! (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

skarrow, 2004-05-08 05:52 am UTC

(no subject) -

elfy, 2004-05-08 06:02 am UTC

Re: -

skarrow, 2004-05-08 06:03 am UTC

(no subject) -

arabel, 2004-05-08 06:07 am UTC

(no subject) -

elfy, 2004-05-08 06:44 am UTC

icon, yourself. - (Anonymous), 2004-05-08 07:09 am UTC

Re: icon, yourself. -

skarrow, 2004-05-08 07:34 am UTC

	cmikhailovic 2004-05-08 06:04 am UTC (link)
	AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA This chick is the best Mary Sue EVAR, with the possible exception of Ms Serenity Moonflower the Gay Activist Allegro. (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-05-10 03:35 am UTC

arabel
2004-05-08 06:04 am UTC (link)

I'm really amused by the idea that there might by copycat wankers now. Soon we're going to have people photoshopping themselves into pictures of Crystal, claiming that they were there at the time and taught her all her mad 'shop skillz.

But yes, even without the scary size-and-colour changing head she's got going on there, the whole thing would be just a leetle more convincing if it were written in English. At least, I assume English is what she's trying for there...?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

elfy, 2004-05-08 06:45 am UTC

(no subject) -

sarajayechan, 2004-05-08 05:38 pm UTC

	sarajayechan 2004-05-08 06:10 am UTC (link)
	...The first thought that came to mind (After the initial "What the crap?!") was... "Damn, that's taking self insertion to a whole new level!" (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

kamil, 2004-05-08 06:18 am UTC

(no subject) -

madamotaku, 2004-05-08 07:53 am UTC

(no subject) -

sarajayechan, 2004-05-08 05:37 pm UTC

	lulinda 2004-05-08 06:12 am UTC (link)
	! I had an idea! Maybe this is Carmen! From the IMDB boards! (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

feloniousfeline, 2004-05-08 06:34 am UTC

(no subject) -

littlest_lurker, 2004-05-08 07:43 am UTC

	c_chan 2004-05-08 06:20 am UTC (link)
	I have nothing to say. 'cept I'm going to be saying "OMG MY HED IS PASTEDE ON YAY" ALL WEEKEND. weeps (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

ecchaniz0r, 2004-05-08 06:45 pm UTC

	urbanspaceman 2004-05-08 06:33 am UTC (link)
	Oh man... Their appearance is so alike, their own mother cant tell them apart snort Yeah right. Obviously mother doesn't know her daughters well enough to tell identical ~~twins~~ sisters apart. Lopez, once married to The Heir to Spain's Throne, Sir Miguel Castillo Ramos. Ahahahahahaha! Oh ~~Trogdor~~ ~~Crystal~~ Maria, I pine for you! (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

mireille, 2004-05-08 06:39 am UTC

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mrbimble, 2004-05-08 09:40 am UTC

(no subject) -

redmoose, 2004-05-09 03:41 am UTC

	dawnswalker 2004-05-08 06:37 am UTC (link)
	Well, at least she doesn't do things halfway. (Reply to this)

	sesana 2004-05-08 06:55 am UTC (link)
	Holy fuck. I'm not sure if this is the funniest thing in the world or the saddest. But she sure doesn't go halfway with her crazy. (Reply to this)

	crickets 2004-05-08 07:03 am UTC (link)
	Another one? Bwahahahahaha! What do you want to bet Crystal is seething that someone would dare to steal her gig? Pack up the emergency supplies, grab the life vests, and engage splooge shields, stat. It's so ~~freaking hilarious~~ sad. (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

sarajayechan, 2004-05-08 05:38 pm UTC

(no subject) -

krazycat, 2004-05-08 11:17 pm UTC

rum_tum_tum
2004-05-08 07:24 am UTC (link)

*sporfle* Man, Maria has done it all, and I mean that in more ways than one. That bio absolutely blew my mind. Now, I shall shed tears of blood, while I laugh at the batshit insanity and photomanip conspiracy of the fandom.

When I saw the pictures where she and Orlando are about to kiss and the final one where Viggo is holding her while looking down at her, I felt like spooning my eyes out. And the quality of these manips are godawful. At least try to make it look remotely convincing, like Crystal. Maybe I'm wrong, but, to me, Orlando's hand looks abnormally large in the picture where he and Maria are cheek-to-cheek. Orlando smash!

(Reply to this)

	More wankage... YES! dotakapip 2004-05-08 07:29 am UTC (link)
	Hey, has anyone found the orignals of these photos? (Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: More wankage... YES! -

ipomoea, 2004-05-08 01:24 pm UTC

	byagghametta 2004-05-08 07:47 am UTC (link)
	Crystal Lite is pastede on, yay! (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

dotakapip, 2004-05-08 07:53 am UTC

fairy_tale_echo
2004-05-08 07:58 am UTC (link)

This has got to be a joke. It just HAS to be. I refuse to believe anyone could seriously...

Look at the black & white picture of her and, um, Lori. Check out the neck area. *SHE* IS PASTEDED ON, YAY!

And her bio! It's a thing of beauty forever:

Doesn't like selfish, communistic people who only care about the world if there is something in it for them.

Fucking communistics! They ruin everything for everyone!

It's a joke. Right? Right?!!!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

arabel, 2004-05-08 01:59 pm UTC

(no subject) -

byagghametta, 2004-05-08 05:19 pm UTC

(no subject) -

bubosquared, 2004-05-09 04:49 am UTC

	hermiones_hymen 2004-05-08 08:38 am UTC (link)
	Bad manips aside, parts of her bio are lifted directly from the bio someone else wrote about her alleged mother, Monica Bellucci, on IMDB. It also states that Monica's FIRST child will be born later this year. Maybe this was some sort of Role Playing page? I mean, look at her list of cousins no less... Three nose jobs? Pfft. (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) -

byagghametta, 2004-05-08 05:20 pm UTC

	kittenkatt 2004-05-08 08:43 am UTC (link)
	She states that her mother is lovely actress Monica Belluci, and she has an older sister. Monica Belluci was born in 1968 and would have had to have been pregnant prior to puberty. EVEN HER FAMILY IS PATSTEDE ON YAY!! God knows her Engrish is, anyways :p (Reply to this)(Thread)

Exactly. -

ruaha56, 2004-05-08 07:23 pm UTC

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-05-09 07:27 am UTC

(no subject) - kittenkatt, 2004-05-10 05:20 pm UTC

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