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Mary (notapirate) wrote in fandom_wank,
@ 2004-05-08 16:20:00

Current mood:

annoyed

A New York Minute Wank
This is my first wank so yeah :P.

I was bored so I decided to read movie reviews and I came across the yahoo user movie review. Stumbling upon A New York Minute, the latest Olsen Twin installment of bad acting and why won't they die movies, I noticed quite a bit of wank.

The yahoo movie reviews aren't a message board but people kept on adding more reviews into the response of another. For an example...there is the class, "YOU ARE AN IDIOT FOR GIVING THIS MOVIE ABOVE A C!" then there is the response with, "If you don't like the Olsen Twins, don't see it!" then the perverted, "I gave visuals a C because the twins are hot." Then, there is the most wanky, "The Olsen twins are racist!" There are about at least 4 reviews in response to that topic alone.

I was bored until I read the reviews. Now, I think I ripped my spleen from laughing so hard.

(Post a new comment)

wakkymse
2004-05-09 12:02 am UTC (link)

Oh man, and I thought the professional reviews on Rotten Tomatoes were entertaining. [1] This, though, is every bit as bad as the wank that breaks out on a regular basis over on IMDB! The "MK&A are TEH RACIST OMFG" one was funny, but I think the gushing, super-wanky A++++ reviews are even more hilarious. Yeah, I don't have much to add.

-lee

---
[1] FYI, most of them called it a bad remake of Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and some chided the Olsens for trying to say they're adults by making "PG porn"....yeah, you're really gonna convince anyone that you're ~~22 and dead sexy~~ all grown up when you're just shy of 18, look like anorexic 8th-graders, and are trying not to alienate your tweener audience... *eyeroll* Anyway, they didn't like it for the most part, and I'm tempted to see it just for the trainwreck value...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: notapirate 2004-05-09 12:04 am UTC (link)
	I'm tempted to see it as well for the same reason. I just don't want to spend the money on it XD (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

big_bad_wolf, 2004-05-09 12:12 am UTC

Re: -

notapirate, 2004-05-09 12:14 am UTC

Re: -

big_bad_wolf, 2004-05-09 12:19 am UTC

Re: -

notapirate, 2004-05-09 12:23 am UTC

Re: -

big_bad_wolf, 2004-05-09 12:29 am UTC

notjo, 2004-05-09 04:59 am UTC

tempslut, 2004-05-09 06:33 am UTC

	misswindy 2004-05-10 06:14 pm UTC (link)
	The "MK&A are TEH RACIST OMFG" one was funny, but I think the gushing, super-wanky A++++ reviews are even more hilarious. Word. I have tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard now. LOL (Reply to this)(Parent)

	marginalsanity 2004-05-09 12:05 am UTC (link)
	they desearve some credit because they have way more money than anyone at their age I'm sorry, I don't give people credit for having lots of money. I give credit for good acting. And btw, this review was genius. XD (Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: notapirate 2004-05-09 12:06 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, I liked that one too. You know the person who wrote it probably didn't mean a word of it. XD (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

marginalsanity, 2004-05-09 12:09 am UTC

	misswindy 2004-05-10 06:21 pm UTC (link)
	Ehhh. That person stole my idea. :P (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: -

marginalsanity, 2004-05-11 06:20 am UTC

	onmyforehead 2004-05-09 01:29 am UTC (link)
	Psssst... we're not supposed to call them the Olsen twins anymore. 'Cause they're really like, individuals, and they like, want to be treated like individuals, you know? Never mind that the last time they were in something where they weren't twins was It Takes Two, and they still acted like twins anyway. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	littlest_lurker 2004-05-09 04:08 am UTC (link)
	B-but, if they want to be treated as individuals, why are they always together?!?! And why is it that when ever they are photographed it's always in this really creepy, thisclosetooneanotherincestewwewwmybrainishurtingfromallthecreepyOMFG!! pose? ~~and it's not the good kind of twincest neither~~ (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

tempslut, 2004-05-09 06:37 am UTC

madamotaku, 2004-05-09 08:40 am UTC

mariagoner, 2004-05-11 08:21 am UTC

bunny, 2004-05-09 09:21 pm UTC

littlest_lurker, 2004-05-10 12:36 am UTC

onmyforehead, 2004-05-10 06:24 am UTC

vassilissa, 2004-05-11 12:25 pm UTC

	impendingdoom 2004-05-09 11:22 am UTC (link)
	I actually thought they were twins in that. Like the Parent Trap all over again or something. The only thing I remember them not being twins in was Full House, Instead, they were the same person. >>; Go figure. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

onmyforehead, 2004-05-09 06:08 pm UTC

schoenschoen, 2004-05-09 08:09 pm UTC

nakannimi
2004-05-09 02:15 am UTC (link)

These reviews were very amusing. I enjoyed the pure, white hot hate many people expressed for this movie.

I would rather watch grass grow for ten years then watch the first 10 minutes of this movie. It was just awful, boring, stupid, unsophisticated, dumb, gay, gay, gay, & GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Usually I think it's wrong to use the word gay as a general insult, but that was funny.

If you like this movie you should choose one of the options from the following list:

a. Shoot yourself in the face
b. Go to Mt. Everest and f**king drown
c. Step infront of a moving train

or

d. Use a rusty blade and don't forget it's down the street, not across the tracks

Wow. I will definitely not be seeing this. For all I know it could be Oscar material, but seeing the Olsen twins insipid faces on the poster would keep me miles away. And I don't understand what's supposedly so hot about them. They look pretty homely to me, and have since they played an ugly little kid on Full House. Is it just the fact that they're twins that gets people all hot and bothered? Or is it the skanky way they dress? Oh dear, now I'm getting wanky.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	allen 2004-05-09 02:44 am UTC (link)
	Icon love! And I want to know how someone would drown atop Mt. Everest. The mind boggles. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - nakannimi, 2004-05-09 05:34 pm UTC

	notjo 2004-05-09 05:02 am UTC (link)
	How can one drown at Mt. Everest? Oh well. I do think it's the twin factor, frankly. (Reply to this)(Parent)

mariagoner
2004-05-11 08:28 am UTC (link)

And I don't understand what's supposedly so hot about them. They look pretty homely to me, and have since they played an ugly little kid on Full House. Is it just the fact that they're twins that gets people all hot and bothered? Or is it the skanky way they dress? Oh dear, now I'm getting wanky.

I think it's the twins thing. Hell... I hope its just the female-twins thing, since that's a pretty mudane fantasy. Because honestly... I think it would be even more frightening to find out that some ~~pedophiles~~ men are attracted to them because they look like Gollum's scrawny, trollish, jailbait cousins.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

	psychofangirl 2004-05-09 02:54 am UTC (link)
	Blah. I knew that movie was crap the second I saw the coming attractions. (Reply to this)

	(Anonymous) 2004-05-09 04:35 am UTC (link)
	I find it very wanky when people have an inordinate amount of hate for two teenage girls. Yeah, they aren't good actors, and yeah, the twin "werealwaystogether thing needs to STOP, but come on. I can actually think of less talented people, that are always in our face, that are hated much less. (Reply to this)

byagghametta
2004-05-09 04:45 am UTC (link)

Bwahah! Even half the good reviews are "I haven't seen it yet, but I bet it'll be cool!" or "I love the Olsen Twins, let's see more of them nude on the big screen! I'm going to see this one *zip*"

I don't think more than 15 people there have seen this damn movie, and still over 300 people have managed to review everything from the Olsen looks ("THEY'RE HOT!" to "They're ugly hoes, bleach my eyeballs away!") to the actual movie direction ("a+, it has Olsens!" to "f. It has Olsens.").

Psychic movie reviews, huzzah!

(Reply to this)

	Icon! skarrow 2004-05-09 05:22 am UTC (link)
	WHO ARE YOU CALLING A SHORTY WHO'S BARELY VISIBLE AND HARD TO TARGET?! <3 (Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: Icon! notapirate 2004-05-09 05:24 am UTC (link)
	Heheh... (Reply to this)(Parent)

	kicklecubicle 2004-05-09 06:14 am UTC (link)
	Ahh, Mary-Kate and Ashley...bleugh...one thing that majorly squicked me about 'em was the inordinate amount of grown men drooling at their TV sets/magazines/internets, going "Only [X] more years/months/days until they're LEGAL! lust". Meanwhile, the twins still look like 12 year-olds. Barf. Just...barf. (Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - nakannimi, 2004-05-09 07:51 am UTC

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-05-10 09:46 pm UTC

	smileandnod05 @LJ (Anonymous) 2004-05-09 06:31 am UTC (link)
	Bugs me how they get into NYU easy as you please while I have to apply. Anywho, hate to ask this, but anyone got a code to spare? I pay back. eep. (Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: smileandnod05 @LJ -

xturtle, 2004-05-09 09:53 am UTC

smileandnod05 @LJ - (Anonymous), 2004-05-11 07:50 am UTC

	kimera 2004-05-09 11:01 am UTC (link)
	The Olsen Twins scare me. Mostly because they're "The Olsen Twins" - that whole lack-of-seperate-identity thing is just CREEPY. Even their IMDB bios are identical. hides from teh_ev0l (Reply to this)(Thread)

nekoneko, 2004-05-10 06:43 pm UTC

kimera, 2004-05-10 07:35 pm UTC

	(Anonymous) 2004-05-09 01:38 pm UTC (link)
	Has anyone else noticed that the Olsen twins looked like those little troll dolls when they were on "Full House?" Now they just look like taller, half naked troll dolls :) (http://movies.yahoo.com/mvc/dfrv?mid=1808503931&s=&rvid=7-85102&i=10&spl=&ys=HqP92FxZk6cSWA.CQ_zawg--) Very helpful review, I found this one to be one of the best there. (Reply to this)(Thread)

mydruthers, 2004-05-09 05:40 pm UTC

	malachan 2004-05-09 03:03 pm UTC (link)
	Nice to see this movie bombed at the box office on opening day. :D By the way, if this is the kind of crap that our country spews out, is it any wonder that the terrorists hate us? I'm just saying. Funny, but still, there's got to be some jurisimprudence law about invoking TEH TERRORISTS. Anyone? Or I could make one myself? (Reply to this)(Thread)

porphyria, 2004-05-09 03:22 pm UTC

	oxydosic 2004-05-09 07:51 pm UTC (link)
	The only reason i was even mildly tempted to see this movie was because Eugene Levy is in it. I loves me some Eugene Levy. (Reply to this)(Thread)

michiru, 2004-05-10 05:56 am UTC

onmyforehead, 2004-05-10 06:26 am UTC

michiru, 2004-05-10 06:28 am UTC

pokecheck, 2004-05-11 10:41 am UTC

	gjeanz 2004-05-11 09:14 am UTC (link)
	I have never liked the Olsen twins, even when they were wee little critters. Ugh. The whole OMG THEY SO HOT WHEEWHEEWHEE thing is disgusting too. o_O (Reply to this)

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