Because it had to be done.
fandom_wank is something of an unruly 100 headed monster that regularly devours its own offspring. That many heads can be hard to keep track of [insert bawdy Jasmin St. Clair joke here] especially if, for some reason there’s a mob of n00b heads still in the early stages of their development or vocal ones that are just plain stupid silly.

It hasn’t helped that we’ve had a few exercises in cannibalism recently, none of which demonstrated fandom_wank’s better qualities. Old wank is dug up and reposted; OT conversations spawn Son of OT sequels or metawank, and the whole ‘too lazy to put down the cheetos’ ideology is lost on a new wave of trolls. And so the Ouroboros democracy of fandom_wank marches on and 0ld sk00l wankas are frustrated because this territory seems, well, familiar.

The 200+ new members that flooded the gates during the Crystal Wank are blamed, and Rules are posted.

fwgreatesthits is created to end the “Victoria who?” questions.

There are locked posts, unlocked posts, Meta posts, rants about the state of the wank and a general nostalgia for the good old days. It doesn’t help, there still be suckage in the wank, and the locked posts of DOOM continue.

Someone creates a 1337 community, ostensibly in response to teh locked and friends certain wankas. The community is locked and I shall not discuss its contents or purpose. I'll leave that to sagralisse who I fear and admire, but must link to anyhow. phosfate is also less than pleased at being added. Old grudges (about modding style?!?) are raised, Snacky's Law trampled and yes, a N00B comm is started.
Could it be? Do we have an honest to God BNW deathmatch?

I’d pass the popcorn, but it’s sticky.

On a personal note I'd like to add that I like the people on both sides of this, and I tried to be sensitive to any hurt feelings generated by this mess. I've also tried to respect the wishes of the 1337 comm by not discussing the comm, only the wank around it.