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Irony ([info]isntitironic) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2004-06-23 20:43:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood:irritated
Entry tags:boo hoo, community: deleterius, fandom: lord of the rings

Wank Repeats Itself.
Okay, remember the poetiwank of Sweet Baby Ninetails? We seem to have returned to that position in the great circle of wank. A few days ago, a Mary-Sue named Sabriel was reported on Deleterius. Upon discovering this, the author had a cow, complete with, yes, a wanky poem:

They laugh at me,

poke fun at me,

and all I did was try.

I tried so hard

so very hard,

but all I can do now is cry.

Maybe I should go.

They want me to go;

they shove me out the door.

I wanted to write,

I thought I could write,

But I shall not write anymore.

My tears fall down

and down and down,

into the abyss of despair;

And not one of those people,

those wicked, evil people,

will ever, ever care.

Sadness took me,

sadness has taken me,

like the darkness has taken the light.

And no man,

not a single man,

will help me to stand and fight.

I have faded away,

so very far away,

past the greyness I have gone.

and though I am here;

and still I am here,

but no memory of me lives on.

Into shadow I have fallen.




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(Post a new comment)


[info]mooncalf
2004-06-24 05:50 am UTC (link)
Hooray! Now all she needs is her own personal Not-Bob!

(Reply to this)


[info]photosinensis
2004-06-24 05:52 am UTC (link)
I smell a Not-Bob coming. This ought to be fun.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]arseted, 2004-06-24 06:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]electricchick, 2004-06-24 06:38 am UTC

[info]shinigami_co
2004-06-24 05:57 am UTC (link)
Good God.

I don't care much for poetry (can't write it for crap), and even I can tell it sucks.

Makes me wish LJ wasn't taking a crap so I could read the original wank. ;_;

(Reply to this)


[info]kijikun
2004-06-24 06:02 am UTC (link)
*cough* [info]otf_wank or we_wank*cough*



(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]tigerlily, 2004-06-24 06:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-06-24 06:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]telesilla, 2004-06-24 06:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-06-24 06:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]telesilla, 2004-06-24 06:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-06-24 07:10 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-24 10:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]terminal_frost, 2004-06-24 11:23 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-24 07:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]terminal_frost, 2004-06-24 10:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-24 04:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-06-24 05:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 05:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nessa_t, 2004-06-24 05:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 05:52 pm UTC
Re: - [info]nessa_t, 2004-06-24 05:56 pm UTC

[info]plazmah
2004-06-24 06:08 am UTC (link)
Does she say her father has cancer and that concrit was the straw that broke the Mary-Sue's camel's back?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]littlest_lurker, 2004-06-24 07:43 am UTC

(Deleted post)
(no subject) - [info]lukita, 2004-06-24 08:14 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-24 09:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]notjo, 2004-06-24 10:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]terminal_frost, 2004-06-24 11:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]notjo, 2004-06-24 11:36 am UTC

[info]zarla
2004-06-24 06:33 am UTC (link)
My tears fall down
and down and down,
into the abyss of despair;


I can't even express how hard that made me laugh.

(Reply to this)

Re: hmmm
[info]adinaj69
2004-06-24 06:36 am UTC (link)
The world's tiniest violin is playing right now!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: hmmm - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 07:30 am UTC
Re: hmmm - [info]plazmah, 2004-06-24 05:10 pm UTC
Re: hmmm - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 05:20 pm UTC
Re: hmmm - [info]elanor_durall, 2004-06-24 02:10 pm UTC
Re: hmmm - [info]arseted, 2004-06-24 03:30 pm UTC
Re: hmmm - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 05:21 pm UTC

[info]sesana
2004-06-24 06:40 am UTC (link)
As a parody, that poem would be hysterical. Ok, it is anyways.

(Reply to this)


[info]hylian_shadow
2004-06-24 06:41 am UTC (link)
sadness has taken me,
like the darkness has taken the light.


I thought she was writing angsty wank. This sounds more like badly written porn! XD

Suethor/Sadness OTP! OMGTHEIRLUVISSOWANGSTY!!!!111

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]fairy_tale_echo, 2004-06-24 07:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hylian_shadow, 2004-06-24 10:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cairea, 2004-06-25 10:40 pm UTC

[info]visp
2004-06-24 06:57 am UTC (link)
My tears fall down, and down and down,
into the abyss of despair; And not one of those people,
those wicked, evil people, will ever, ever care.

Sadness took me, sadness has taken me,
like the darkness has taken the light.
And no man, not a single man,
will help me to stand and fight.


Oh gods that is rich! Christ, I haven't laughed so hard in ages.

(Reply to this)


[info]geekmagirl
2004-06-24 07:05 am UTC (link)
The laughing, it makes me fall out of my chair. My...freakin'...GOD. Because, y'know, the phrase "abyss of despair" isn't cliched and overused. Not at all.

(Reply to this)


[info]chaoscheebs
2004-06-24 07:08 am UTC (link)
And no man,
not a single man,
will help me to stand and fight.


Did you ask the women then?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]beccastareyes, 2004-06-24 07:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2004-06-24 07:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]littlest_lurker, 2004-06-24 07:45 am UTC
Re: - [info]beccastareyes, 2004-06-24 07:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 05:21 pm UTC

[info]darkwitch666
2004-06-24 07:28 am UTC (link)
I do not know
Why Suethors go
Into fits of black despair
O'er comments made
On Sues displayed
In public places where
Anyone with time
To wade thru slime
Can read all they can bear.

But it's okay
When, like today,
They churn out poems so sad
And let us read,
With merry speed,
Their angst, which makes us glad.
I think I'll pray
Starting today
That this becomes a fad.

In closing I'll
Just write a while
In case you all are blank
Regarding what
I've written--but
I swear this ain't a crank
It's good to be
(I say truly)
Again on fandom_wank.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]arielchan, 2004-06-24 07:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]reinhardt, 2004-06-24 08:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 08:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]toxictattoo, 2004-06-24 04:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2004-06-24 05:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 05:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 05:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]krazycat, 2004-06-24 08:19 pm UTC
Orgy!!!! - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 08:31 pm UTC
Re: Orgy!!!! - [info]krazycat, 2004-06-24 08:40 pm UTC
Re: Orgy!!!! - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 11:32 pm UTC
Re: Orgy!!!! - [info]visp, 2004-06-25 05:24 am UTC
Re: Orgy!!!! - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-25 07:31 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-27 04:42 am UTC

[info]littlest_lurker
2004-06-24 07:48 am UTC (link)
My tears fall down

and down and down,

into the abyss of despair;


Are you sure you don't mean the pit of despair? Because that would explain the albino with the wheelbarrow I just saw.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-24 08:12 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-25 09:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-06-25 11:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-27 10:15 pm UTC
Damn you HTML - (Anonymous), 2004-06-27 11:59 pm UTC

[info]fairy_tale_echo
2004-06-24 07:57 am UTC (link)
Sabriel?! Oh no she didn't! The SueAuthor Is a playjurist! She totally ripped that name off the identity of a REAL character, Garth Nix's Sabriel who is the eponymous heroine in the first volume of Nix's very well-written and extremely clever fantasy series The Abhorsen Triology.

As if that's surprising. In other news, that is the best poem EVER!

I wanted to write,
I thought I could write


Well, you thought wrong, didn't ya?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - nakannimi, 2004-06-24 05:43 pm UTC

[info]nostalgia
2004-06-24 08:22 am UTC (link)
*wanks just because F_W is back. BACK! BAAAACKKK!!!*

(Reply to this)


[info]amakath
2004-06-24 10:13 am UTC (link)
*hugs Teh Funneh*

Oh, how I missed you! Don't ever leave me again!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]terminal_frost, 2004-06-24 11:29 am UTC
Re: - [info]amakath, 2004-06-24 07:41 pm UTC

[info]msmongi
2004-06-24 11:34 am UTC (link)
Maybe I should go.
They want me to go;


Will you go to lunch? Go to lunch. Will you go to lunch!

Look, Suethor! It's the world's tiniest Kevin Spacey screaming just for you.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]llama_treats, 2004-06-24 04:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nessa_t, 2004-06-24 05:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-24 04:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-26 08:30 am UTC

[info]mouseybrown
2004-06-24 12:12 pm UTC (link)
You know, the wanky poem kind of reminds me of Lisa Simpson's poem following the death of her kitty cat. You know, the one that goes:

I had a cat called Snowball,

She died! she died!

My mother said she ran away,

She lied! She lied!

Why of why is my kitty kat dead?

Couldn't that Chevy have hit me instead?

Only, in The Simpsons it's funny. In the case of this M-S author, it's just sad. And more than a little pathetic.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]dawnswalker, 2004-06-24 03:03 pm UTC

[info]tianxiaode
2004-06-24 12:16 pm UTC (link)
Apropros of nothing:

Love the icon. :)

(Reply to this)

F_W! Let's never fight again!
[info]dawnswalker
2004-06-24 03:05 pm UTC (link)
Well, if it's any consolation to her... She may have failed at writing LotR fanfiction, but as a Linkin Park song it could be worse.

And in the end
Legolas' hot ass doesn't even
matter

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: F_W! Let's never fight again! - nakannimi, 2004-06-24 05:52 pm UTC

[info]ahiru
2004-06-24 03:48 pm UTC (link)
Yay, the drama queen poems! I love the angsty drama queen poems about how criticism killed the author's soul. I always find myself wondering if these people write poems every time they do bad in school or something too (because their teachers are so MEEEEN).

"My soul is crying
My soul is sad
Because you told me I was dumb
Just because I couldn't add

In this abyss I cry and moan
And with wings bound I cannot fly
You've shackled me to darkness deep
Just because I cannot multiply

Oh, if only crimson blood would spill
Detach my spirit so I fly free
But no, no, I am sunk in dark
Because on this math test I got a D."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]khym_chanur, 2004-07-04 03:43 am UTC

[info]fishandbicycle
2004-06-24 04:14 pm UTC (link)
past the greyness I have gone.

I hope that doesn't mean she's a Brit.

*points to icon*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-06-24 04:50 pm UTC

[info]darkvalkyrie
2004-06-24 04:40 pm UTC (link)
It reminds me of my sister's bad goth poetry.

(Reply to this)


[info]cpip
2004-06-24 05:00 pm UTC (link)
Oh, I wince at the badness.

(Reply to this)



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