Band Wank
This one was handed to me on a silver platter by a friend of mine and despite it's size, it's still bloody amusing.

The whole thing can be found here:
http://p089.ezboard.com/fkillradiofrm5.showMessage?topicID=75.topic
But here are the highlights.

LastMessiah goes onto the Kill Radio forum on the band's site and trashes them with big shiny words.

I've got to say that the hubris on this site amazes me. To actually come across celebrations of Brandon's incoherent, barely literate rants onstage and off amuses me to no end, particularly because, at the couple of unfortunate shows I caught, Brandon has amply demonstrated that he has the IQ of an artichoke.

Killradio is a joke, a sham. Are you guys all still living off mom and dad? Still riding around in Mommy's RV? Still trying to convince everyone that you're NOT anything but upper class white kids in Northridge playing at being some sort of frontline of the revolution? Still espousing the same old uninformed anti-political rhetoric? Still as dumb as rocks and getting stoned all the time?

It would appear so.

You guys are about as punk rock as Avril Lavigne.

Fans of the group are upset and fire back.

1. OK.. this might be difficult for you to comprehend, because anyone that wastes their time on a bands message board, and replying to their own message because they cant think of everything at once to say obviously wont be that smart.
Your Opinion does not matter to anyone here. its quite simple, if you dont like something, dont bother with it. The KR boys have a right to free speech, and there are many people that are more than willing to listen to what they have to say. granted you listened, and didnt like what you heard, but we dont want to hear what you have to say, unlike KR. So please, continue on with your sorry little existance, outside the fourm!
kthxbye
2.amen to that. if you don't like them, what's the point in telling their fans that?

And then it get's REALLY wanky. My two favorites so far are the bitchfight between revoltin and LastMessiah (where the both try to win by repeating the same thing over and over and thinking it'll change anyone's mind) over the financial situation of the band and its leader, and DerGerm's post about
Note: As I type this, I am watching Bill and Teds Excellent Adventure.

Wow, this pissing contest has left quite the mess on the floor! And it doesn't seem to be getting anyone anywhere. There really isn't anywhere anyone wants to take it, really. So it seems, at least to myself. Everyone is resorting to classic ad hominim (spelt wrong, forgive me, I'm not a latin language buff) arguements.

"You're stupid, here's why."

"No YOU'RE stupid!"

"Nuh-uh! I have a bigger penis, so I can't be stupid!"

And so forth.

Since it gets us nowhere, let me talk about something else. Because, as you had mentioned on more than one occasion, this IS indeed a forum for free and open debate and conversation.

Marshmellows. I love marshmellows. I like the kind of marshmellows that's misspelt and the two words are jammed together. With an E where an A ought to be. They're very fluffy and delicious, sticky and gooey and sweet. I quite anjoy them.

You know, they used to seal pharos into their sarcophaguses with marsh mallow so that they could dine on its sweet flavor as they traveled along the road into after life. I think I want to be buried with a bag of marshmellows. Oh, better yet, creamated with marshmellows. Have a hint of irony in there.

Another thing I like are pogs. What ever happened to pogs? No one ever plays them, there's no where I know of that carries them anymore. It's just not hip anymore either. I'm sure there ARE people in the world who DO play them still, the hardcore elite. But you probably have to be privleged enough to have ever learned about it before they can realize it's a game to play. Maybe I should start playing pogs again. That would be pretty cool.

So in the end, what I really mean to get at, is that OH MY GOD! I'M IN COLLEGE! Community college (trust me, it's a viable source of education, to many people knock it) to be precise. I read, I watch educational TV, and I have street smarts too. I'm all around a pretty intelligent dude. But you probably wouldn't know it from talking to me. You can't figure out what I'm about from anything I do. I have a hard time talking straight, meaning something, unless I'm in a meaningful debate and conversation. Something that doesn't resort to critisizing language, and way of typing, or way of speaking. Something that doesn't obviously have some trace of asshole ulterior motive.

In other words, I just thought I'd waste your time like you're wasting mine.


All in all, a delightful little wank.

UPDATE: As a link to fandom_wank was posted on the message board, LastMessiah felt the need to come over and comment on US. Enter more spooge.