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Jess D. Ripper ([info]jess_d_ripper) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2004-12-01 07:49:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Maroon 5 Stoner Wank
Maroon 5 appeared in High Times magazine. Naturally, this caused wank. The thread is upside down, you'll have to read it bottom up.

Some out-takes, first up, Kindwords:

kindwords
i was Jewed into attending 311 day in New Orleans a few years ago and much to my surprise was surrounded by FIFTEEN YEAR OLD GIRLS.

HTmusicdude
Kindwords: I don't appreciate the "Jewed" comment. That's out of line.

kindwords
the "jewed" comment was not out of line. i have a chinese-american girlfriend so i cant be a racist... but on the other hand, jews are so lame, just watch comedy central and youll get proof.

HTmusicdude
Kindwords: Go away. You're hate is not wanted here.

kindwords
ho ho! but it's my right, according to the 1st Amendment to the Constitution of this shitty country that I love so dearly, to say whatever the FUCK that i want to say. you see, I'm a true american, HTmusicdude and if all goes according to my plans, someday your children will be reading articles in HT written by yours truly. FUCK!!!

bigzylarge
KINDWORDS-- IS A HATER HE/HER IS JEALOUS OF THE FACT THAT WE DON'T NEED TO CONFORM.WEED IS LIFE, BUT THEN AGAIN YOUR MIND HAS TO BE ABLE TO SEE PAST THE REGULAR. SEE THAT THERE CAN BE MORE, AND THAT THERE IS MORE TO LIFE. SO TOKERS DON'T WAISTE YOUR MEDITATION TO, REPLY TO OUR MISGUIDED FRIEND. JAH BLESS AND GUIDE YOU ALL

anonymous
kindwords... do you really think you're intelligent? Do you really think that if you come out with all this Michael Moore ass-licking shit that people will even begin to think you're intelligent? I don't even know you but I already know you're a contradictory motherfucker and as a stoner, I'd be ashamed if u attributed your so called "superiority" to smoking up. GET A GRIP.

kindwords
anonymous seems really pissed for some reason! if yall keep jerking me off im just gonna keep cumming. i do smoke pot, i just dont worship it or brag on it; and i get really annoyed on a daily basis by lame-o's who brag about it and think that it makes them cool or something. i dont smoke pcp, and im obviously not conforming if i disagree with everyone here. im not digging holes, im merely stating my opinions. im not stupid either. michael moore is full of shit, i dont agree with him ragging our president (albeit i dont like bush anymore than you guys) im not depressed, i have a loving family and great friends/ teachers at my university. i think youre all pissed because i shut up anyone who steps up with bullshit and expects me to eat it. pot doesnt pacify anyone or make them peaceful either. every time i turn around someone is getting jewed on sacks or stingey people dont offer up when they have it. i dont admire marijuana, and im not trying to say that im smarter than anyone, but... until the lame comments and bourgoise cliches stop im not gonna be nice to any of you fucks. you SQUARES wouldnt know cool if it gave you some more meth to smoke on. well, i think i answered every comment on this webpage so im gonna go drink a high-life, smoke my dugout, put on some otis redding and do some physics homework. later squares



some unknown person
Maroon 5? Frickin lame. A lot of bands smoke pot, and 98% of them are better than those sell out tools maroon 5. Bad choice.

bolo
I'm a 30 year old grown ass man and i'm tellin these mf's can jam. Never mind the fact that I'm a straight up hip hop brotha but the only pop rock shit I listen 2 is raw like system, or metallica and those cats got they own sound. Smoke on my niggaz

adam of maroon 5
ok this is fuckin bizarre. i never even post on our bands message board. but after checking out what you all were talking about i feel strangely inclined to say something. first off, i would like to thank the intelligent well meaning people who have articulately defended the band. regardless of whether you like our music. that isnt really the point. saying hideous things about other people is rude, spineless, and totally against everything that "smoking herb" stands for. so let me pollish up a big fat FUCK OFF to those peeps. second, music is god. bottom line...and succeeding has been the most amazing experience possible for me and the rest of the band. and i admire the courage of anyone out there who risks everything to pursue their passion in life. thats BALLS. dont judge us. you have no fucking idea my brothers. peace. thanks for listening
ps-dont bother debating over whether its really the dude from m5 cause it is...much love :)


some unknown person
whats up dude from m5, your lame and your band blows. have a good one. sorry i dont think your 'super cute', i just wont buy your CD. Sellout.

fizzle
All of you M5 haters would have said the same thing about the Beatles if you were around back then. "Oh they're 'pop' or 'lame' or whatever blah blah blah". You're haters. It's what you do. So while you're busy hating, the rest of us are enjoying life and love. How do like them apples?

slash
man maroon 5 is gay ass shit you got to get your self some GNR and metallica sit back smoke a doob and listen to some real music not lame ass music peace

SAMiAM751
wow forget religious tolerance, you guys need to learn music tolerance!
i started listening to Maroon 5 well before they hit it big, and I fell in love with them. They beat out my previously favorite artist, Bob Marley.


bob Marley
what a dork

lovebud
The hate and fear is fucking with you all, chill out, maroon five is super groovy, get high and dance, oh no you are all far too homophobic for that, kindwords check your head, I'm sure your not really so righteous.

TOKERS ' R' US
HEY YOU KNOW I REALLY DO NOT LIKE HATERS WE ALL JUST NEED TO SMOKE OR HERBAL ESSANCE AND GET ALONG NO ONE SHOULD SMOKE THE HERB BY THEMSELVES AND BE GREEDY WITH YOU SHOULD SHARE THE WEALTH AND BE HAPPY IF YOU WERE SMOKING OREGON'S FINEST LIKE I DO EVERYBODY WOULD BE VERY HAPPY JUST LISTEN TO SOME BOB MARLEY AND SOME KOTTONMOUTH KINGS AND SET THE HERBAL MOOD SMOKE AND AND HAVE LOTS OF SEX WITH YOU GILRFRIEND I DO WE ARE THE BEST SMOKERS AND FUCKERS HERE IN OREGON IT 'S OKAY TO BE A LESBIAN AND LOVE IT TO....


I looked for corresponding wank on Maroon 5's board, and found a little. It's worth linking to just for the aggressively tacky signatures.


m5num1forLIFE
is that real??? do they really do that stuff?
twitterpated1
it would appear so
m5num1forLIFE
that kind of...upsets me... ...a lot.................................[monster ellipsis cut for length]

hawtt
that is absolutely disgusting.

IsAwAdAM
hmm well i hate drugs and stuff like that so i wasnt that happy when i saw this thread! i personally think thats its bad that it has been put in a magazine cos some people are nong heads and will do what their fave band will do! SO DONT FOLLOW IN THEIR FOOTSTEPS!!!

Effie
So for all of you goody-goodies out there that want to keep your body "Clean" from drugs --
Do yourself a favor and smoke a f.ucking joint...
And maybe it will make you stop worrying about what some rock band is doing in their free time.


[giant green text] MARIJUANA IS NOT A DRUG. IT IS A PLANT THAT GROWS NATURALLY IN MANY REGIONS OF THE WORLD. IT HAS NOT BEEN STEPPED ON(MIXED WITH ADDITIVES). IT IS A FRIGGIN PLANT PEOPLE!

Ronan7680
If marijuana is not harmful to our bodies then why the hell do you think that it would be illegal in our country which DOES try to warn its citizens against things that may be harmful to themselves and others around us???!!Just ponder that for a moment will ya please?

Pass the Doritos


(Post a new comment)


(Anonymous)
2004-12-01 05:26 pm UTC (link)
slash
man maroon 5 is gay ass shit you got to get your self some GNR and metallica sit back smoke a doob and listen to some real music not lame ass music peace


Some one please explain his screen name to him... please.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]kadath
2004-12-01 06:05 pm UTC (link)
Amusing double meanings aside, Slash is GNR's guitarist. He's the one with the poodle hair and the top hat.

Really, as much as I like rockin' out to GNR and Metallica, calling either "real music" is a bit of a stretch.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mistressrenet, 2004-12-01 08:04 pm UTC
Fun Fact! - [info]wolfgangmozart, 2004-12-01 09:37 pm UTC

[info]redjackcash
2004-12-01 06:31 pm UTC (link)
Yep.

Denying pot is a drug is sort of like trying to justify cheating. You can try, but it doesn't work. Caffiene is a drug. Nicotine is a drug. Marijuana is a drug. Whether one is legal or not doesn't really matter...

...so if you're gonna smoke up, just do it and admit you like drugs. Jesus.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]panthea
2004-12-01 07:19 pm UTC (link)
I like drugs. I admit it. Now pass that shit, yo.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(Reply from suspended user)
(no subject) - meshou, 2004-12-01 09:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-02 12:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]virago, 2004-12-02 12:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]redjackcash, 2004-12-02 02:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]loony666, 2004-12-03 01:34 am UTC

[info]rachel_04
2004-12-01 06:33 pm UTC (link)
*grabs the bag of doritos and munches*

I wonder if that really is Adam? I sure hope so. I just love it when Celebrities show up! Makes it so much more fun.


-Rachel

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jess_d_ripper, 2004-12-01 07:01 pm UTC

[info]elektra3
2004-12-01 07:10 pm UTC (link)
*whimpers*

Mommy, my brain hurts.

I would ask what the hell they were smoking, but... we already know the answer.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2004-12-01 08:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-02 12:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2004-12-02 01:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]loony666, 2004-12-03 01:35 am UTC

[info]panthea
2004-12-01 07:20 pm UTC (link)
If marijuana is not harmful to our bodies then why the hell do you think that it would be illegal in our country which DOES try to warn its citizens against things that may be harmful to themselves and others around us???!!Just ponder that for a moment will ya please?

"Go back to bed, America. Your government is in control."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-12-01 08:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2004-12-02 02:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-12-02 12:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-02 12:32 am UTC

[info]seldomnaughty
2004-12-01 07:32 pm UTC (link)
i have a chinese-american girlfriend so i cant be a racist...

Oh, man. I love when people defend themselves with that and expect it to work. Isn't there some kind of law about invoking that "my friend/relative is [insert diversity!], so I can't be [insert offense against diversity!]"

I know I've seen the "I went to school with a gay person so I'm not a homophobe" attempt before...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mouseybrown, 2004-12-01 07:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seldomnaughty, 2004-12-01 08:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]oftennaughty, 2004-12-01 11:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seldomnaughty, 2004-12-01 11:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]geekmagirl, 2004-12-04 10:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]oftennaughty, 2004-12-04 10:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]geekmagirl, 2004-12-04 10:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-02 12:34 am UTC
(no subject) - redwarrior, 2004-12-03 08:57 pm UTC

[info]mouseybrown
2004-12-01 07:47 pm UTC (link)
i dont smoke pcp

Really? Coz there's a lot of evidence in your post to the contrary, kindwords

i have a chinese-american girlfriend so i cant be a racist... but on the other hand, jews are so lame, just watch comedy central and youll get proof.

Damn those dastardly Jews for ruining Comedy Central! Damn them, I say!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]slackerbitch, 2004-12-01 08:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rinoared, 2004-12-01 10:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - meshou, 2004-12-01 10:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]krazycat, 2004-12-02 02:34 am UTC

[info]msmanna
2004-12-01 07:56 pm UTC (link)
Wow.

They are all so stupid. So fucking stupid. I mean, just, wow. It's one huge sucking tarpit of mind-boggling stupid.

The human race is doomed.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cleo_lassen, 2004-12-04 04:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]msmanna, 2004-12-04 05:03 am UTC
someone help?
[info]ororo
2004-12-01 07:57 pm UTC (link)
kindwords
i was Jewed into attending 311 day in New Orleans a few years ago and much to my surprise was surrounded by FIFTEEN YEAR OLD GIRLS.


Just what the [insert expletive of choice] does "Jewed" mean?


(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: someone help? - [info]mistressrenet, 2004-12-01 08:06 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]slackerbitch, 2004-12-01 09:18 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]mistressrenet, 2004-12-01 09:34 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]ororo, 2004-12-01 09:50 pm UTC
I going to Hell. - meshou, 2004-12-01 10:11 pm UTC
Re: I going to Hell. - [info]slackerbitch, 2004-12-02 04:27 am UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]megmurry, 2004-12-01 08:57 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]phosfate, 2004-12-01 09:16 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]goldberry, 2004-12-01 11:02 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]phosfate, 2004-12-01 11:08 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]goldberry, 2004-12-01 11:26 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]jedilora, 2004-12-01 11:29 pm UTC
Re: someone help? - [info]goldberry, 2004-12-01 11:38 pm UTC

[info]deoridhe
2004-12-01 08:03 pm UTC (link)
HE/HER IS JEALOUS

*dies laughing*

s/h/it needs to take remedial English.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2004-12-01 08:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]deoridhe, 2004-12-01 08:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nonny_mouse, 2004-12-01 10:18 pm UTC

[info]tapedeck
2004-12-01 08:30 pm UTC (link)
Ronan7680
If marijuana is not harmful to our bodies then why the hell do you think that it would be illegal in our country which DOES try to warn its citizens against things that may be harmful to themselves and others around us???!!Just ponder that for a moment will ya please?


Hands up those who want a simple economics lesson. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

(Reply to this)


[info]raane
2004-12-01 08:38 pm UTC (link)
Does no one believe in spelling, grammar, capitalization, and punctuation anymore? *Weeps*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]els_chan, 2004-12-01 08:46 pm UTC

[info]kijikun
2004-12-01 09:00 pm UTC (link)
tl;dr

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2004-12-01 09:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - kroki_refur, 2004-12-01 10:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2004-12-01 11:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - kroki_refur, 2004-12-01 11:39 pm UTC

[info]smo
2004-12-01 09:53 pm UTC (link)
the "jewed" comment was not out of line. i have a chinese-american girlfriend so i cant be a racist... but on the other hand, jews are so lame, just watch comedy central and youll get proof.

The stupid! It BURNS!!! AHHHHHH!!!!!!

(Reply to this)


[info]nonny_mouse
2004-12-01 10:21 pm UTC (link)
TOKERS ' R' US
HEY YOU KNOW I REALLY DO NOT LIKE HATERS WE ALL JUST NEED TO SMOKE OR HERBAL ESSANCE AND GET ALONG NO ONE SHOULD SMOKE THE HERB BY THEMSELVES AND BE GREEDY WITH YOU SHOULD SHARE THE WEALTH AND BE HAPPY IF YOU WERE SMOKING OREGON'S FINEST LIKE I DO EVERYBODY WOULD BE VERY HAPPY JUST LISTEN TO SOME BOB MARLEY AND SOME KOTTONMOUTH KINGS AND SET THE HERBAL MOOD SMOKE AND AND HAVE LOTS OF SEX WITH YOU GILRFRIEND I DO WE ARE THE BEST SMOKERS AND FUCKERS HERE IN OREGON IT 'S OKAY TO BE A LESBIAN AND LOVE IT TO....


However, it seems that smoking the weed renders you incapable of using any punctuation at all :) And who's have thought Oregon was such a great state? *starts packing*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-12-01 10:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]marylake, 2004-12-01 11:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nonny_mouse, 2004-12-02 08:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-02 02:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kinneas, 2004-12-04 06:55 am UTC

[info]blackhat
2004-12-01 11:24 pm UTC (link)
some people are nong heads

Um, anyone want to take a guess what a *nong* is?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sheep_n_wolf, 2004-12-02 12:01 am UTC

[info]virago
2004-12-02 12:58 am UTC (link)
Aaaahahaha, it has nothing to do with the main line of um, un-reasoning, but this dude cracks me up.

bolo
I'm a 30 year old grown ass man and i'm tellin these mf's can jam. Never mind the fact that I'm a straight up hip hop brotha but the only pop rock shit I listen 2 is raw like system, or metallica and those cats got they own sound. Smoke on my niggaz


I can spot three completely different kinds of slang in that paragraph! How many can you spot?!

(Reply to this)


[info]adora_spintriae
2004-12-02 01:01 am UTC (link)
They're stoners?

Well, at least that explains their two-chord "music".

(Reply to this)


[info]ichigatsu
2004-12-02 10:09 am UTC (link)
*points at wank*

See kids, just say no.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]loony666, 2004-12-03 01:29 am UTC

(Anonymous)
2004-12-02 07:26 pm UTC (link)
"They beat out my previously favorite artist, Bob Marley."

bob Marley: "what a dork."

Yeah. That made me giggle far more than it actually warranted.

Yours,
The Anonymouse

(Reply to this)


[info]loony666
2004-12-03 05:03 am UTC (link)
I wish these people would stop being on my side smoking my drug.

Man, I hate potheads.

(Reply to this)


[info]suzuran_sumire
2004-12-03 08:09 am UTC (link)
Damn it, now I need some pot to smoke so I can get rid of the hell.

Why can't any of my fandoms be SANE? Oh well, at least I get to use my Drag Queen! Adam icon.

(Reply to this)

*BEEEP! WANKER DETECTED!*
(Anonymous)
2004-12-05 08:50 pm UTC (link)
Wow. Doesn't Kindwords' screenname make him a hypocrite? He almost redeemed himself toward the beginning of that last remark, then he starts wanking again.

~Omnicrom~

(Reply to this)


 
   
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