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Faulty Premise ([info]faultypremise) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2004-12-15 01:59:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
More wankery.
yoyotan wants everyone at fanficrants to know:

Thou shalt not spoil smutfic with the words 'cock', 'ass' or ... that other word, the one that starts with 'f'. (Only censored because this is the lead post and I'm too lazy to see if it's against community rules or not.)

Warning: Adult discussion going on over there, including the delicate phrasing of sexual euphemisms. And a LOT of wank.

Surprised it isn't over here yet.
Page 1 of 2
<<[1] [2] >>

(Post a new comment)


[info]the_clansmen
2004-12-15 10:07 am UTC (link)
simply stop reading all together when i get to phrases that involve the words "fuck", "ass", "cock" and other such slang terms for body parts

So...basically, a penis must always be referred to as a penis? Doesn't that get boring? I'm picturing this scene where penis is about every other word, here...

Or as one of my classmates was saying when the teacher walked in the other day, "penis penis penis penis!"

Incidentially, I agree with about the third or fourth poster - for me it depends on the character I'm writing. If I'm writing a nice, sweet character, the character gets euphenisms. If I'm writing a dirty character, they get slang. And I suppose if I wrote a doctor, s/he would just refer to the "penis".

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2004-12-15 10:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_clansmen, 2004-12-15 10:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rinoared, 2004-12-15 11:02 am UTC
... - [info]the_clansmen, 2004-12-15 11:36 am UTC
... - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 04:08 pm UTC
... - [info]mister_terrific, 2004-12-15 09:02 pm UTC
... - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-12-15 09:52 pm UTC
... - [info]rinoared, 2004-12-15 11:40 pm UTC
... - [info]terminal_frost, 2004-12-16 12:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2004-12-15 11:31 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-15 08:48 pm UTC
... - [info]funwithrage, 2004-12-15 11:54 pm UTC
... - [info]octavia, 2004-12-16 12:45 am UTC
... - [info]funwithrage, 2004-12-16 02:01 am UTC
... - [info]octavia, 2004-12-16 03:04 am UTC
... - [info]skarrow, 2004-12-16 03:06 am UTC
... - [info]baskinglizard, 2004-12-16 05:56 am UTC
... - [info]funwithrage, 2004-12-16 06:50 pm UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-17 01:55 am UTC
... - [info]funwithrage, 2004-12-17 03:15 am UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 07:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]shun_mcdaddy, 2004-12-15 04:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seppuku, 2004-12-16 12:25 am UTC
... - [info]shun_mcdaddy, 2004-12-16 12:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]blackhat, 2004-12-15 05:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]abydonian, 2004-12-15 07:17 pm UTC
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... - [info]crickets, 2004-12-16 07:29 am UTC
... - [info]ladybirdsleeps, 2004-12-16 09:23 am UTC

(Reply from suspended user)
(no subject) - [info]kinneas, 2004-12-16 02:39 am UTC
... - [info]ymfaery, 2004-12-17 05:27 am UTC
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(no subject) - [info]bastet, 2004-12-15 09:31 pm UTC
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(no subject) - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 09:12 pm UTC

[info]cesare
2004-12-15 10:17 am UTC (link)
I'm 37, married for 15 years and have 4 kids. When do I become entitled to call it fucking?

Give that woman a cigar.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2004-12-15 11:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]zannechaos, 2004-12-15 11:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2004-12-15 11:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2004-12-15 09:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - redwarrior, 2004-12-15 09:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]valarltd, 2004-12-19 06:23 am UTC

[info]elysian
2004-12-15 10:24 am UTC (link)
Personally I feel everyone should use 'swelling spire of desire'. Let's be mature about this, people.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mooncalf, 2004-12-15 10:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2004-12-15 10:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mooncalf, 2004-12-15 10:33 am UTC
... - [info]elysian, 2004-12-15 11:50 am UTC
... - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2004-12-15 06:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_clansmen, 2004-12-15 11:02 am UTC
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... - [info]vasaris, 2004-12-15 07:03 pm UTC
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... - [info]the_clansmen, 2004-12-15 07:35 pm UTC
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... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 01:46 am UTC
... - [info]restlesshands, 2004-12-16 04:22 am UTC
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(no subject) - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 03:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]blackhat, 2004-12-15 05:36 pm UTC
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(no subject) - [info]faultypremise, 2004-12-15 10:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]loonylupinlover, 2004-12-15 10:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2004-12-15 10:47 am UTC
... - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 11:01 am UTC
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... - [info]slackerbitch, 2004-12-15 01:03 pm UTC
... - [info]visp, 2004-12-16 06:36 am UTC
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... - [info]platedlizard, 2004-12-15 11:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]octavia, 2004-12-15 01:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2004-12-15 05:31 pm UTC
... - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-12-15 10:00 pm UTC
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... - [info]kyuuketsukirui, 2004-12-15 11:30 am UTC
... - [info]suzycat, 2004-12-15 11:38 am UTC
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(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2004-12-15 03:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2004-12-15 08:32 pm UTC
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(no subject) - [info]laurelin_kit, 2004-12-16 04:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]visp, 2004-12-16 06:38 am UTC

[info]ladybirdsleeps
2004-12-15 10:46 am UTC (link)
[info]vandonovan is the best part. But since I'm happily fapping posting away in there, that's all I'm gonna say about him.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 11:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rachelmap, 2004-12-15 11:09 am UTC
... - [info]teleute, 2004-12-15 11:14 am UTC
... - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 11:53 am UTC
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... - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 12:40 pm UTC
... - wizzard, 2004-12-15 08:44 pm UTC
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... - dearladydisdain, 2004-12-15 01:40 pm UTC
... - [info]pokecheck, 2004-12-15 11:19 am UTC
... - [info]rachelmap, 2004-12-15 01:11 pm UTC
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... - [info]the_clansmen, 2004-12-15 11:39 am UTC
... - [info]megmurry, 2004-12-15 06:50 pm UTC
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... - [info]virago, 2004-12-16 05:30 am UTC
... - [info]zorayda, 2004-12-16 05:16 am UTC
... - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 11:44 am UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-22 06:26 am UTC
... - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 03:55 pm UTC
... - [info]funwithrage, 2004-12-15 07:02 pm UTC
... - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 09:40 pm UTC
... - [info]funwithrage, 2004-12-15 11:58 pm UTC
... - [info]msmanna, 2004-12-16 12:34 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mister_terrific, 2004-12-15 09:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zannechaos, 2004-12-15 11:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wankismyfandom, 2004-12-15 12:10 pm UTC
... - [info]zannechaos, 2004-12-15 12:17 pm UTC
... - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-12-15 10:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sewingmyfish, 2004-12-15 01:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]alpheratz, 2004-12-15 06:54 pm UTC
... - [info]loki, 2004-12-15 08:45 pm UTC
... - [info]alpheratz, 2004-12-15 08:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2004-12-15 11:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kyuuketsukirui, 2004-12-15 12:41 pm UTC
... - [info]msmanna, 2004-12-15 01:07 pm UTC
... - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-12-15 02:05 pm UTC
... - [info]msmanna, 2004-12-15 04:39 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:01 pm UTC
... - [info]crysiana, 2004-12-15 06:08 pm UTC
... - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-15 06:48 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:50 pm UTC
... - [info]eljuno, 2004-12-15 06:48 pm UTC
... - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-12-15 06:57 pm UTC
... - [info]mindset, 2004-12-15 10:39 pm UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 06:08 am UTC
... - [info]mindset, 2004-12-16 06:30 am UTC
... - [info]crickets, 2004-12-16 07:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]zorb, 2004-12-16 07:39 am UTC
... - [info]crickets, 2004-12-16 07:48 am UTC
... - [info]zorb, 2004-12-16 07:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]marks, 2004-12-15 05:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]megmurry, 2004-12-15 06:54 pm UTC
... - [info]marks, 2004-12-15 07:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]captainecchi, 2004-12-16 12:40 am UTC
... - [info]marks, 2004-12-16 12:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]msmanna, 2004-12-16 12:52 am UTC

[info]wolfychan
2004-12-15 11:07 am UTC (link)
but i think the real reason that all of that irks me is that i've always been taught that "fuck" isn't sex...it's violence. *shrugs*

(From one of the OP's responses to comments)

Well, there's an interesting bit of psychology for you.

BTW, no one's allowed to use the word "squirrel" anymore, okay? I associate squirrels with violence! Please respect that and censor yourselves appropriately.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]teleute, 2004-12-15 11:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]restlesshands, 2004-12-15 11:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]prettypinkkitty, 2004-12-15 12:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]beccastareyes, 2004-12-15 04:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]marks, 2004-12-15 05:48 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:07 pm UTC
... - [info]funwithrage, 2004-12-15 07:03 pm UTC
... - [info]ladybirdsleeps, 2004-12-15 08:01 pm UTC
... - [info]funwithrage, 2004-12-16 12:00 am UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 12:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 09:43 pm UTC
... - [info]teleute, 2004-12-15 11:06 pm UTC
... - [info]herlovewasajoke, 2004-12-16 03:47 am UTC
... - [info]teleute, 2004-12-16 03:57 am UTC
... - [info]herlovewasajoke, 2004-12-16 04:27 am UTC
... - [info]teleute, 2004-12-16 04:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cairea, 2004-12-15 11:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-15 11:28 am UTC
... - [info]suzycat, 2004-12-15 11:37 am UTC
... - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 11:52 am UTC
... - [info]beccastareyes, 2004-12-15 04:32 pm UTC
... - [info]alpheratz, 2004-12-15 07:01 pm UTC
... - [info]vasaris, 2004-12-15 07:14 pm UTC
... - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 11:51 am UTC
... - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-15 11:54 am UTC
... - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 12:00 pm UTC
... - [info]prettypinkkitty, 2004-12-15 12:35 pm UTC
... - [info]squeakytoy, 2004-12-15 12:40 pm UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 07:33 am UTC
... - dodyskin, 2004-12-15 05:45 pm UTC
... - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-15 06:27 pm UTC
... - dodyskin, 2004-12-15 06:43 pm UTC
... - [info]cairea, 2004-12-15 08:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-15 05:55 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:06 pm UTC
... - [info]naienko, 2004-12-15 07:25 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 08:43 pm UTC
... - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2004-12-16 03:05 am UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-16 05:15 am UTC
... - [info]cairea, 2004-12-15 08:41 pm UTC
... - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 09:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]undeadgoat, 2004-12-16 06:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 03:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:05 pm UTC
They're evolving! Run! - [info]goblin, 2004-12-15 06:32 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]naienko, 2004-12-15 07:25 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 08:42 pm UTC
... - [info]jedilora, 2004-12-15 09:33 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 09:40 pm UTC
... - [info]jedilora, 2004-12-15 10:56 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 11:04 pm UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 07:38 am UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-16 07:53 am UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 08:59 am UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-16 07:15 pm UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 09:42 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-17 01:58 am UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-17 02:17 am UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-17 02:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladybirdsleeps, 2004-12-15 08:04 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 08:39 pm UTC
... - [info]crickets, 2004-12-16 08:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hellespont, 2004-12-15 06:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - redwarrior, 2004-12-15 09:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2004-12-15 09:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]elgato_gamgins, 2004-12-16 12:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-16 12:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alisalias, 2004-12-16 12:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-16 12:36 am UTC
... - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2004-12-16 03:06 am UTC

[info]indis_earfalas
2004-12-15 11:28 am UTC (link)
Ooooh, dear. I must just be really immature today ... 'cause all I really want to do is laugh my freaking arse off.

Then I'd like to give the OP a nice cup of tea and a lay down.

*sigh* I'll go an read it again when I'm feeling more my age.

(Reply to this)


urbanspaceman
2004-12-15 11:31 am UTC (link)
He rubbed her areola in a clockwise fashion and fondled her nipples until she was suitably lubricated. Having by now acquired an erection, he put a condom on his penis, being sure to leave room at the reservoir tip. He put his penis into her vagina. Repeatedly. Until she felt peak of sexual excitement, characterized by strong feelings of pleasure and by a series of involuntary contractions of the muscles of the genitals. He abruptly discharged his semen and withdrew. Deep sleep commenced.

XD

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2004-12-15 11:33 am UTC
(no subject) - urbanspaceman, 2004-12-16 08:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2004-12-15 03:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-15 03:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]undeadgoat, 2004-12-16 06:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 03:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sookail, 2004-12-15 04:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]coffee_mug, 2004-12-15 05:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]faultypremise, 2004-12-15 05:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2004-12-16 04:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 12:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mister_terrific, 2004-12-15 07:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2004-12-15 08:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]akairis, 2004-12-16 03:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]baskinglizard, 2004-12-16 05:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]crickets, 2004-12-16 08:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nights_mistress, 2004-12-16 10:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]palabradot, 2004-12-15 09:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - redwarrior, 2004-12-15 09:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkwitch666, 2004-12-15 10:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2004-12-15 10:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lindentree, 2004-12-15 10:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2004-12-16 03:41 am UTC
(no subject) - urbanspaceman, 2004-12-16 08:49 am UTC
... - [info]aerobot, 2004-12-16 03:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - urbanspaceman, 2004-12-16 08:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jedilora, 2004-12-16 03:54 am UTC
LMAO - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 03:46 pm UTC

[info]ichigatsu
2004-12-15 11:58 am UTC (link)
Someone told me that his girlfriend called his penis "little mushroom". She would also make it move around to mimic it singing the national anthem.

Not really relevant to the wank at hand, but pretty amusing what other people will call their body parts.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]prettypinkkitty, 2004-12-15 12:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cesare, 2004-12-15 01:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]slackerbitch, 2004-12-15 01:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rinoared, 2004-12-15 02:04 pm UTC
... - [info]prettypinkkitty, 2004-12-15 02:38 pm UTC
... - [info]rinoared, 2004-12-15 02:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]moonjaguar, 2004-12-15 05:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 12:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]frau_eva, 2004-12-16 06:25 am UTC

[info]slackerbitch
2004-12-15 01:16 pm UTC (link)
Dang. As soon as someone disagreed, the OP started frantically tap-dancing and going, "Never mind! I didn't mean to say that! LOL, you're all right, of course!"

I hate that. 1, it makes for less interesting wank, and 2, Dang, bitch, if you had the balls to say it, have the balls to back it up.

Maybe she's in favor of things like, "He put his -- thing -- in her -- you know!!!"

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]virago, 2004-12-15 02:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]slackerbitch, 2004-12-15 03:17 pm UTC
... - [info]virago, 2004-12-16 05:34 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kyuuketsukirui, 2004-12-15 03:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]slackerbitch, 2004-12-15 03:14 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:15 pm UTC
... - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 10:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lovelyzelda, 2004-12-16 04:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]valarltd, 2004-12-19 06:49 am UTC

[info]octavia
2004-12-15 01:34 pm UTC (link)
And now the Penis Song's playing in my head again.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - redwarrior, 2004-12-15 09:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]octavia, 2004-12-16 12:36 am UTC

(Anonymous)
2004-12-15 01:56 pm UTC (link)
What I don't understand is why people feel the need to bring in their own sexual history into everything. It's wankery adding to the initial wank of the OP. I know the OP called them all stupid virgins, but really... the majority of fandom smut is probably written by thirteen-year-old virgins who have no idea what they're talking about. Saying "LOOKIT MEE!! I'm a thirtysomething submissive engaged to my dom!" makes a person an exception, but it doesn't necissarily disprove the original comment.

Besides, it sounds more like someone's trying to appear special than anything else.

And the "I'd rather the underaged people write smut instead of going out and having sex" comment was priceless. Way to further discourage actual human interaction in favor of the internets, people. 9_9

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]spacefille, 2004-12-15 02:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rinoared, 2004-12-15 02:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bubosquared, 2004-12-15 03:23 pm UTC
... - [info]rinoared, 2004-12-15 03:39 pm UTC
... - [info]bubosquared, 2004-12-15 03:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_clansmen, 2004-12-15 07:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 08:15 am UTC
... - [info]rinoared, 2004-12-16 08:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-12-15 02:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]slackerbitch, 2004-12-15 03:20 pm UTC
... - [info]the_clansmen, 2004-12-15 07:41 pm UTC
... - [info]annabelle_lee, 2004-12-15 10:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]senor_pinata, 2004-12-15 04:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2004-12-15 11:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]megmurry, 2004-12-15 07:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]naienko, 2004-12-15 07:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 07:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]undeadgoat, 2004-12-17 04:06 am UTC
... - [info]megmurry, 2004-12-17 04:11 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 08:50 pm UTC

[info]toxictattoo
2004-12-15 02:41 pm UTC (link)
Well, it seems like a lot of people are just insulted that you're defining them as virigins/immature/etc. because I guess that's something that they can protest, instead of facing up to admit that they are in actuality, really just uncreative writers. Well, most of them, anyay.

Well...now...I'll just take my uncreative self over here and wibble in the corner that I'm now not only unprofessional (which I never claimed I was) AND uncreative.

...woe...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]toxictattoo, 2004-12-15 02:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]gorogoro, 2004-12-15 05:22 pm UTC
... - [info]mistressrenet, 2004-12-15 05:58 pm UTC
... - [info]mistressrenet, 2004-12-15 06:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-15 06:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]alpheratz, 2004-12-15 07:10 pm UTC
... - [info]hinata, 2004-12-16 03:19 am UTC
... - [info]hinata, 2004-12-16 03:20 am UTC
... - [info]undeadgoat, 2004-12-17 04:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladydisdain, 2004-12-15 09:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2004-12-15 10:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]akairis, 2004-12-16 03:59 am UTC

[info]aerobot
2004-12-15 03:28 pm UTC (link)
WOW. That exploded fast.

Honestly, I don't like 'cock' much either, but I either deal with it or find another story. Not go and spread this sort of shit and wank off.

Oh, oops. I meant 'manually stimulate'. :D

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2004-12-15 03:30 pm UTC (link)
Elfhood!

That's the only proper name! And if it's purple and weeping, all the better!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2004-12-15 03:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nekoneko, 2004-12-15 05:02 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:19 pm UTC
... - [info]nekoneko, 2004-12-15 06:21 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-15 06:37 pm UTC
... - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-16 10:26 pm UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-17 01:51 am UTC
... - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-17 01:58 am UTC
... - [info]smo, 2004-12-17 02:05 am UTC
... - [info]aerobot, 2004-12-16 03:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mister_terrific, 2004-12-15 09:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 06:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]valarltd, 2004-12-19 06:26 am UTC

[info]sarajayechan
2004-12-15 03:48 pm UTC (link)
Aah, I figured that one'd turn into wank. *grin*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Icon Lovin' - [info]bishounenhuntrs, 2004-12-20 02:32 am UTC
Re: Icon Lovin' - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-20 02:33 am UTC

[info]pet
2004-12-15 04:20 pm UTC (link)
There are euphemisms here that I've never seen, and my five years as a slasher made me think that was impossible. I'm completely helpless with laughter, over here.

I think "manram," "boycunt," and "cock snot" are still my favorites. Of course, "elfhood" is marvelous, too.

One wonders if the OP has ever had sex. I don't think I've ever used/heard of anyone using the actual clinical terms for body parts during sex. And swear words? We all know how fuckin' unrealistic THEY are.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]senor_pinata, 2004-12-15 04:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pet, 2004-12-15 06:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]coffee_mug, 2004-12-15 05:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pet, 2004-12-15 07:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]toxictattoo, 2004-12-15 05:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pet, 2004-12-15 07:02 pm UTC
... - [info]rolling_my_eyes, 2004-12-15 10:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2004-12-15 05:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - dodyskin, 2004-12-15 07:04 pm UTC
... - [info]pet, 2004-12-15 07:23 pm UTC
... - [info]phosfate, 2004-12-15 09:22 pm UTC
... - dodyskin, 2004-12-15 09:31 pm UTC
... - [info]lindentree, 2004-12-15 10:45 pm UTC
... - [info]annabelle_lee, 2004-12-15 10:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-12-15 07:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pet, 2004-12-15 07:24 pm UTC
... - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2004-12-15 08:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sarajayechan, 2004-12-15 09:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ueuecoyotl, 2004-12-15 10:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mastervex, 2004-12-16 05:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mister_terrific, 2004-12-16 12:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]combledore, 2004-12-17 02:04 am UTC

[info]shun_mcdaddy
2004-12-15 04:45 pm UTC (link)
You know? If you have your own journal,shouldn't you post that there instead of Fanficrants?

Of course,people are going to whine bitch at you for something you said that people will disagree with!

Also,I think the word 'cock' is fucking overrated anyways these days. When I went past the Samurai Troopers fandom and into the Gundam Wing fandom four years ago reading fanfic,but never writing or anything,it was amazing. But now everybody's doing it becuase it's sooo hip and now!

I miss 'penis'.:_:

(Reply to this)


[info]coffee_mug
2004-12-15 05:04 pm UTC (link)
Suck my friggin' rooster.

That's too fucking funny. It reminds me of the way I thought when I was 13 and randomly surfed fanfiction. Naturally at that points, smut was a squick for me. And I didn't get why people wrote it but I was clever enough not to read it or not rage at people who wrote some.

1. if you can't think of a less crude way of writing smut, please refrain.
No, you refrain from reading it. Smut is honest sex. I'd rather read a smutfic with words like "fuck" and "cock" and "ass" than strange words nearing purple prose like "he gently prodded her open with his thick meatsword as she gently gasped as he filled her tight womanly cave with a shaft pumped up with pleasure".
Because, first of all, ew.
Second of all, not hot.

There are stories where sex is written more ..poetically. One fandom where I haven't found a single fic that can be considered "smut" in the sense that it'd be full-on porn is when I've read LoTR het (eowyn/faramir omg yay).

Ditto on the underage thing, though. Sort of. Okay, no. Perhaps "way underage". No 12 year olds have written amazing smut that I've read. But a few sixteen year old writers come to mind.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]vasaris, 2004-12-15 07:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]coffee_mug, 2004-12-15 09:06 pm UTC
... - [info]vasaris, 2004-12-15 09:51 pm UTC
... - [info]coffee_mug, 2004-12-15 11:14 pm UTC
countess update
(Anonymous)
2004-12-15 06:11 pm UTC (link)
http://www.journalfen.net/userinfo.bml?user=famousextra

the confused nutter has gone and made hersef a journalfen.

she's also still going on about fanwank on imdb.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: countess update - [info]shun_mcdaddy, 2004-12-15 06:17 pm UTC
Re: countess update - [info]pyratejenni, 2004-12-15 07:25 pm UTC
Re: countess update - [info]goblin, 2004-12-15 06:44 pm UTC
Re: countess update - (Anonymous), 2004-12-15 06:58 pm UTC
... - [info]goblin, 2004-12-15 08:28 pm UTC
Re: countess update - [info]winterfalls, 2004-12-15 08:14 pm UTC
Re: countess update - [info]jaseroque, 2004-12-15 08:41 pm UTC
Re: countess update - [info]faultypremise, 2004-12-15 08:42 pm UTC

[info]dreamtoday
2004-12-15 06:53 pm UTC (link)
He wedged his leg between her thighs and inserted his fingers into her vagina. She moaned in delight. She grasped his erect penis. Their two bodies were both slippery and gritty with sand. He entered her, pressing his forefinger into her anus. They lay there, rocking gently, blind to the world.

i happened to type this up for a meme. it's from a book. that was published.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-15 06:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dreamtoday, 2004-12-15 07:04 pm UTC
... - [info]wolfychan, 2004-12-15 07:14 pm UTC
... - [info]toxictattoo, 2004-12-15 07:50 pm UTC
... - [info]mister_terrific, 2004-12-15 10:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]octavia, 2004-12-16 12:51 am UTC

[info]pyratejenni
2004-12-15 07:24 pm UTC (link)
You know what I want to see? A rant about the unrealistic things people say during orgasm. 'Cuz I could top 'em all with Virginia Henley's, "Sail away with me, Jassi, to another world!"

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]bobomagicksock, 2004-12-15 08:26 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pyratejenni, 2004-12-16 12:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mister_terrific, 2004-12-15 09:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pyratejenni, 2004-12-16 12:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wolfgangmozart, 2004-12-16 12:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]necronomist, 2004-12-16 05:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]crickets, 2004-12-16 08:23 am UTC
... - (Anonymous), 2004-12-16 07:04 pm UTC
... - [info]crickets, 2004-12-17 09:03 am UTC

[info]lykaios
2004-12-15 07:34 pm UTC (link)
Yes, let's give our tales of illicit sex between fictional characters a veneer of respectability by calling them "dilly-dos".

I wonder when the good folks over at fanficrants will understand the concept of preference. Sure there are some practices that are frowned upon by the majority of fandoms everywhere (sticking an author's note in the middle of a story highlighted by twenty-six asterisks), but stuff like this....It's like a call to arms over apples and oranges.

Incidentally, I prefer apples. But not the mushy, oversweet kind.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jaseroque, 2004-12-15 08:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - redwarrior, 2004-12-15 09:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2004-12-15 09:57 pm UTC

[info]llama_treats
2004-12-15 07:47 pm UTC (link)
Oh, please. We all know that a cock by any other name would still smell as...

Um, nevermind.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]lindentree, 2004-12-15 10:49 pm UTC

[info]ladysorka
2004-12-15 08:57 pm UTC (link)
I think we just need to link them up to the good porn, as they keep saying that they've just never seen good smut that uses words like "ass".

Hmm. *tries to think of authors to nominate*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jaina, 2004-12-16 02:08 am UTC

redwarrior
2004-12-15 09:13 pm UTC (link)
I just wonder where the hell gay male porn would be if they never used "those" sorts of words. >3

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mistressrenet, 2004-12-15 09:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]morganya, 2004-12-16 01:24 am UTC
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