You can make wank from everyday household items.
This is more the ghost of a wank, as the best stuff had been bahleeted before I found it, but it appears to have sprung from the teenisest thing

In the community manchester for the British city of that name, someone posed the question Does anyone know where I can buy goth baby clothes from in Manchester?

This provokes a huge tower of deletia that seems to cover single parenthood, being "an ugly geek" and abortion.

The original poster returns to sulk in public.