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Sister Psychosis (bohicamouse) wrote in fandom_wank,
@ 2003-06-11 19:32:00

Current mood:	femme
Current music:	Frank Zappa - Baby Snakes

boiz suX0r
Moment of Zen. These are the hard-hitting questions, my friends. Is it sexist to say girls give better hugs than boys do? Do we truly have the right to judge literature, even if it's </i>really fucking bad</i>? Does posting your thoughts on a post someone else makes in a public discussion forum automatically mean you're reading too much into it? Is a single word of this thread on topic? And of course, the eternal question--Why do girls need boys anyway?

Let it be said that whatever the intent of the poem was I refuse to watch chick flicks, much less cry at them. I do however know exactly what girls feel like. Raaaaaaawr.

(Post a new comment)

aruru
2003-06-12 03:05 am UTC (link)

"Because it is harder for a girl to spooge on someone's face." = Best answer to that question EVER. *still laughing over that one*

I also love the person who says that "there's no such thing as bad poetry!" and then goes on to add:

"Poems have always been, and probably always will be, personal parts of ourselves and by saying it's not a good poem, you're basically saying the author is not a good person."

as well as:

"I've never thought it was right to criticize poems...stories, fanfics, etc; fine."

What, so someone who writes regular prose instead can't be personal and emotional now? And even if they are, criticizing their work is a-ok, while poetry isn't? WTF?

And I see our "friend" Mr. Toasty is there, too!

This wank is already brilliant, and it can only get better as more replies come in. *gets more popcorn*

(And personally, yes, I agree that the "poem" is stupid and stereotypical of boys and girls. ~~Oh god, I must think the author is Satan himself!~~)

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	notapipe 2003-06-12 03:33 am UTC (link)
	Prose doesn't have the deeply personal line breaks of poetry. It's not right to insult someone's line breaks. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	aruru 2003-06-12 11:13 am UTC (link)
	Your icon... is both highly disturbing and insanely hilarious. God knows how you wound up with just the riiiiiight Gollum pic to use there. DIES XD (Reply to this)(Parent)

jfpbookworm, 2003-06-12 08:40 pm UTC

schoenschoen
2003-06-12 03:56 am UTC (link)

"Because it is harder for a girl to spooge on someone's face." = Best answer to that question EVER. *still laughing over that one*

BUKKAKE!

"Poems have always been, and probably always will be, personal parts of ourselves and by saying it's not a good poem, you're basically saying the author is not a good person."

Then, by this same rationale, we're all going to hell if we laugh at a Mary Sue, because that's saying the Mary Sue author is a bad person. O.o Ohhh, but if that Dragonhart girl were here! She'd surely agree! *I still need to post that wank, by the way...*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

amasaglajax, 2003-06-12 04:00 am UTC

schoenschoen, 2003-06-12 04:03 am UTC

aruru, 2003-06-12 04:05 am UTC

virago, 2003-06-12 05:21 am UTC

aruru, 2003-06-12 10:11 am UTC

phosfate, 2003-06-12 05:10 pm UTC

redconverse, 2003-06-12 08:00 am UTC

aruru, 2003-06-12 10:25 am UTC

redconverse, 2003-06-12 11:31 am UTC

aruru, 2003-06-12 11:48 am UTC

guinevere33, 2003-06-12 07:33 pm UTC

redconverse, 2003-06-12 10:09 pm UTC

ymfaery, 2003-06-13 04:27 am UTC

ymfaery, 2003-06-13 04:19 am UTC

palingenesis, 2003-06-13 01:07 am UTC

soy_latte
2003-06-12 05:08 am UTC (link)

I also love the person who says that "there's no such thing as bad poetry!" and then goes on to add:

"Poems have always been, and probably always will be, personal parts of ourselves and by saying it's not a good poem, you're basically saying the author is not a good person."

as well as:

"I've never thought it was right to criticize poems...stories, fanfics, etc; fine."

I have heard that bullshit before, although about not criticizing any sort of literary work... usually said by someone who sucks at writing. And I often suspect they have little or no ambition to improve, or at least they seem that way because they think what they write is perfect/brilliant already. I think the people who say that or believe that would do best by not showing their work to anyone ever. Then they won't get their wittle feewings hurt when the meanie people challenge their work... plus we wouldn't have to put up with their incredible suckitude.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

aruru, 2003-06-12 10:52 am UTC

iczer6, 2003-06-12 06:42 pm UTC

jfpbookworm, 2003-06-12 08:28 pm UTC

jfpbookworm, 2003-06-12 08:43 pm UTC

uniquesnowflake, 2003-06-13 12:39 am UTC

bohicamouse
2003-06-12 10:38 am UTC (link)

Heh, I almost mentioned the wonderful bukkake response but hey, I like to leave a little gift for the wank fans. Like an easter egg of sexual fetishism. Mmm, egg fetish.

Wasn't that hilarious? I don't care if your poem was written from the heart, your heart should at least be able to proofread it even if it can't manage an attempt at originality. Same reason I skip over Cham's Bronze posts. Well, maybe not skip over them (I am a member of TWSS for a reason) but you know. Hee.

It's stereotypical of boys, girls, and the relationships between them because it doesn't even take into account the fact that hey, a chick can have a male best friend and NOT be banging him.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

aruru, 2003-06-12 11:03 am UTC

bohicamouse, 2003-06-12 11:19 am UTC

aruru, 2003-06-12 12:28 pm UTC

	phosfate 2003-06-12 05:13 pm UTC (link)
	I also love the person who says that "there's no such thing as bad poetry!" Anyone who says that should be forced at gunpoint to read all the Heartsongs books. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

snacky, 2003-06-12 06:54 pm UTC

phosfate, 2003-06-12 07:02 pm UTC

jfpbookworm, 2003-06-12 08:46 pm UTC

guinevere33, 2003-06-12 09:55 pm UTC

jfpbookworm, 2003-06-12 11:26 pm UTC

phosfate, 2003-06-13 05:45 am UTC

uniquesnowflake
2003-06-13 12:17 am UTC (link)

"there's no such thing as bad poetry!"

There most certainly is such a thing as bad poetry, and people should never have to listen to it, because it's hurtful to the senses. Likewise, people should never consider their works of poetry an expression of themselves if the poetry is bad poetry. It's insulting to the readers to have to sympathize with a bad personality.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

soy_latte, 2003-06-13 02:50 am UTC

schoenschoen
2003-06-12 03:54 am UTC (link)

Well, at least I'm not the only one who thought that 'poem' sucked ass. It sounded like one of those 'feel-good' things my Aunt Debbie keeps spamming my e-mail with. X_x You know, the "Ms. Anderson believed in the power of the Lord and won the lottery" or "This little girl is dying of =insert disease here= and can't get medical help unless you send this e-mail to 19 other people in five minutes!"

And personally, I know how other women feel, too. ^_~ *leers**gropes Leigh Ann*

And lastly, I leave you with this (bastardized) quote from Fruits Basket, which is exactly what that damned poem reminded me of:
Kagura: But Shigure! You don't know how a woman in love feels!
Shigure: I've felt enough to know!

Hah!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

aruru
2003-06-12 04:01 am UTC (link)

And lastly, I leave you with this (bastardized) quote from Fruits Basket, which is exactly what that damned poem reminded me of:
Kagura: But Shigure! You don't know how a woman in love feels!
Shigure: I've felt enough to know!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

I've only seen the first two episodes of Fruits Basket that were on a DVD sampler CD a friend lent me, but I thought Shigure was adorable. Now I think I like him even more. >D

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

schoenschoen, 2003-06-12 04:04 am UTC

aruru, 2003-06-12 04:08 am UTC

schoenschoen, 2003-06-12 04:26 am UTC

bohicamouse, 2003-06-12 10:46 am UTC

schoenschoen, 2003-06-12 11:11 pm UTC

	bohicamouse 2003-06-12 10:42 am UTC (link)
	That's exactly what I thought--the girl says she got it from a friend and five'll get you ten that friend got it in a forward. Hmm, wonder if it's up on Snopes anywhere? They eat up those damn things. videotapes I think I just may need to see that series . . . (Reply to this)(Parent)

	sorchar 2003-06-12 08:05 am UTC (link)
	I love that icon, man. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	bohicamouse 2003-06-12 10:43 am UTC (link)
	The idea just came to me, perfectly formed . . . no pun intended. My favorite part of it is the alt text actually, hee. <333333 (Reply to this)(Parent)

	"because it is harder for a girl to spooge on someone's face..." darthhellokitty 2003-06-12 10:02 am UTC (link)
	http://sexylosers.keenspace.com/188.html NOT work friendly. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: "because it is harder for a girl to spooge on someone's face..." bohicamouse 2003-06-12 10:47 am UTC (link)
	coffcoff Mwahahhaha! Like I needed another webcomic to get addicted to . . . (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: "because it is harder for a girl to spooge on someone's face..." aruru 2003-06-12 11:11 am UTC (link)
	HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Man, I've been shown Sexy Losers before, and the masturbation-addicted brother and sister pair always amused me because of how disturbing they are (Anyone ever see the strip where he MAKES A HOMEMADE DILDO FOR HER BIRTHDAY? DIES XD), but I didn't know he now had bukkake porn star charas! LMAO XD (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: "because it is harder for a girl to spooge on someone's face..." -

unoriginality, 2003-06-13 01:10 pm UTC

jfpbookworm
2003-06-12 08:34 pm UTC (link)

The poem pisses me off (why do boys need girls like that, anyway?), but this Chu person cracks me up.

When *you* have the same pretty plaque on your wall that states you're an English major, and when *you* are tutoring a group of people on that same subject, you come back, and tell me.

Okay. I've got a bachelor's in English from Brown. Want me to beat you over the head with it? (At least then it'd be good for *something*.) And I've taught writing to remedial, accelerated and mainstreamed students, as well as run a couple of adult writing workshops. Don't try to pull that cred shit.

Some more fun English-major stuff:

Just because it doesn't strike anything in you doesn't make it a bad poem at all.

Hi Chu, I'm reader-response criticism. You thought I was fluffy and relativistic, but now I'm gonna kick your ass.

Poems are considered the rawest form of literature, because it solely depends upon the author's feelings and nothing else.

Move over, RRC. I'm New Criticism, and I want in on some of that intentional-fallacy ass-kicking.

To further back my words, take this for example. I could write a beautiful poem that sounded good and was professionally written, but has absolutely no feeling behind it. That would be a *piece of crap*.

Ezra Pound wants a word with you.

I could also have a poorly written poem with passionate words and something straight from the heart-- THAT is what should truely be valued in this form of literature, not the actual way it was presented.

Which is why universities are replacing The Norton Anthology of English Literature with Chicken Soup For the Soul in their classes.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	guinevere33 2003-06-12 10:00 pm UTC (link)
	:: Cheers :: I want to smack people who think that writing doesn't have to be crafted to be good. I'm also fairly certain that most people have forgotten that "literature" derives from "literate." (Reply to this)(Parent)

	cmikhailovic 2003-06-12 11:55 pm UTC (link)
	Fucking word. (Am PhD. candidate in English, here, and am sitting on my hands to keep from wading into wank and saying what you said, only meaner.) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

iczer6, 2003-06-13 01:25 am UTC

	croupier 2003-06-13 12:17 am UTC (link)
	My bachelor's in Literary and Cultural studies would like to put a boot in Chu's ass, too. But wait! What's that I hear? Is it Adrienne Rich banging her head into a wall? Why yes, I think it is. (Reply to this)(Parent)

uniquesnowflake
2003-06-13 12:51 am UTC (link)

Why Do Gay Boys Need Girls? (A Para-Poem By Houie)

I was sitting in my chair last night,
thinking, why do fags need girls?
Is it because they hug us?
No, because we get bigger, better, and longer hugs
from our boyfriends.
Is it because they write us love letters?
No, because gay boys don't write letters,
interesting, honest, or hilarious ones.
Is it because they call us on the phone?
No, because boyfriends sleep over
and stay up all night, fucking and licking.
Is it because they watch movies with us?
No, because boyfriends actually hold us when we cry during romantic ones,
and then talk about the cute actors afterwards.
Is it because they can feel our pain?
No, because boyfriends are boys
and know exactly what a hit in the balls feels like.
Is it because they lend us their jackets?
No, because girlfriends are too tiny to share all the clothes they own
and we might break them if they are too small to wear.
Is it because they eat our cookies?
No, because boyfriends go to each our houses
to eat even more of our cookies, even at 2 in the morning.
Is it because they might love us one day and then leave us on another?
No, because true boyfriends will stay
until the very end of the days (provided we've still got an asshole).
So, after pondering over these questions,
I ask myself again,
Why do gay boys need girls
when they already have enough boyfriends
that will last a lifetime (provided they nver lose their address books)?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	aruru 2003-06-13 01:30 am UTC (link)
	Despite how often I say it, it's never often enough: I love you, Houie. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	henryjones 2003-06-13 02:02 am UTC (link)
	I think I just injured an internal organ from laughing so hard. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	schoenschoen 2003-06-13 04:07 am UTC (link)
	Taht was so beautie-full! sheds one tear :') Can I lick you? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

uniquesnowflake, 2003-06-13 05:37 am UTC

	pepperpot 2003-06-13 04:53 am UTC (link)
	Hmm...that Mr. Toasty posting. Don't I remember him from a previous wank? ponders (Reply to this)

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