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lady with a spinning head ([info]fairy_tale_echo) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2005-05-07 13:21:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:authors, creator wank, person: anne rice, religion

Well, At Least Anne Rice Doesn't Have a Messianic Complex Or Anything...
Anne Rice is getting biblical in her next book, due out in November from publisher Random House. "Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt" will tell the story of Jesus' early years in his own words.

Yes, his own words. Lestat wasn't enough, now Christ the Lord is speaking through Anne Rice.

She even wrote a lengthy letter, as we well know is her habit, to go with advance copies of the book:

"I'm not a priest, I can't be one. I'll never be able to go to the altar of the Lord and say the words of consecration at Mass, 'This is my body. This is my blood.' No, I can't work that magnificent Eucharistic miracle. But in humility, I have attempted something transformative which we writers dare to call a miracle in the imperfect human idiom we possess. It's to bring Him here in the form a story, and that story is Christ The Lord."

A miracle, you see. I can just see the news now: Anne Rice Heals The Lame And Writes Crappy Book In One Day!

This is straining my Dickensean principles to the max.

ETA: Thanks to jessicareeves we have the entire EW article and excerpted "letter of truth."

"What does it feel like to be Jesus? What did it feel like to be God and Man as a child?"

Tune in for my book when, I, Anne Rice will tell you what it feels like to be Jesus. EXCLUSIVE!
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(Post a new comment)


[info]altera
2005-05-07 10:40 pm UTC (link)
...damn.

*heddesk*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]artimusdin, 2005-05-10 08:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]altera, 2005-05-10 08:38 am UTC
Aaaack! - [info]kittenmommy, 2005-05-20 02:31 am UTC

[info]narcissam
2005-05-07 10:50 pm UTC (link)
Now that she's gone all Catholic again, can you imagine having Anne Rice in your parish? I can imagine her heading up the Altar Flowers committee and cornering the priest and random parishioners, "I did my BEST getting those wilted flowers and do you show any appreciation? No! You just complain that I obviously got them from a dumpster."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sizer, 2005-05-08 02:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rhi_silverflame, 2005-05-08 09:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sizer, 2005-05-09 02:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 09:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mercutia, 2005-05-11 09:09 am UTC

[info]amasaglajax
2005-05-07 10:52 pm UTC (link)
Crikey. Wasn't Memnoch enough?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]miharu, 2005-05-07 11:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]julia, 2005-05-08 10:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]amasaglajax, 2005-05-09 12:16 am UTC

[info]sir_hellsing
2005-05-07 11:05 pm UTC (link)
Are she and Hamilton having a sekrit contest about who wanks more?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wolfsamurai, 2005-05-08 01:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2005-05-08 09:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]enoh, 2005-05-08 04:51 pm UTC

[info]simkin_mouse
2005-05-07 11:05 pm UTC (link)
But in humility, I have attempted something transformative which we writers dare to call a miracle in the imperfect human idiom we possess.

After 17 years of proper functioning and honourable service to mankind, Anne Rice broke my brain! A miracle, a miracle! The evil [translation: something that dares criticize her] has been banished!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]julian_black, 2005-05-08 06:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]queerasfolkfan, 2005-05-08 06:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wankismyfandom, 2005-05-08 07:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2005-05-08 09:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]beccastareyes, 2005-05-08 09:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 09:46 am UTC

[info]dakotapratt
2005-05-07 11:09 pm UTC (link)
Dear Anne Rice,

Down the road, not across the street.

See you soon,
God

(Reply to this)


[info]telegramsam
2005-05-07 11:14 pm UTC (link)
Can I say right here that I already absolutely hate that woman's writing?

Seriously, she just needs to go retire on an island somewhere and never write anything again. Especially if she plans on pulling more shit like this.

"Oh yes, I can't be a priest so I'm gonna go shove words into Jesus' mouth."

I hope the fundies eat her.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]coppala, 2005-05-07 11:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2005-05-08 01:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tangentialone, 2005-05-08 01:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]crickets, 2005-05-08 02:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2005-05-08 07:33 am UTC

(Deleted post)
(no subject) - [info]cool_water, 2005-05-09 08:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]gaisce, 2005-05-08 12:04 am UTC
*splorfle* - [info]romana03, 2005-05-08 12:50 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]nevadafighter, 2005-05-08 12:58 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]romana03, 2005-05-08 01:02 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]crickets, 2005-05-08 01:06 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]sir_hellsing, 2005-05-08 01:21 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]tangentialone, 2005-05-08 01:42 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]cyn, 2005-05-08 03:42 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]cruel_illusion, 2005-05-08 05:49 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]platedlizard, 2005-05-08 07:34 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]pyratejenni, 2005-05-08 07:57 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]darkwitch666, 2005-05-08 08:14 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 09:38 am UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]gunshou, 2005-05-08 04:45 pm UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]cool_water, 2005-05-09 08:38 pm UTC
Re: *splorfle* - [info]mercutia, 2005-05-11 10:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]crickets, 2005-05-08 01:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2005-05-08 04:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]crickets, 2005-05-08 06:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]crickets, 2005-05-08 07:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2005-05-08 05:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2005-05-08 07:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sidhebastardess, 2005-05-09 12:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]crickets, 2005-05-09 12:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2005-05-09 09:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]luna, 2005-05-08 01:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vergilsparda, 2005-05-08 03:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rogue, 2005-05-08 09:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vergilsparda, 2005-05-08 10:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cyn, 2005-05-08 03:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladysphinx, 2005-05-08 04:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 09:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]northatlantic, 2005-05-08 07:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bubba_ray, 2005-05-09 12:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pipssister, 2005-05-09 08:28 pm UTC
With fava beans and a nice Chianti. - ataniell93, 2005-05-08 10:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]enoh, 2005-05-08 04:55 pm UTC

[info]iczer6
2005-05-07 11:15 pm UTC (link)
...

This will not end well.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]troglodyke, 2005-05-07 11:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]elysian, 2005-05-08 07:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]littlebitca, 2005-05-10 07:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hellespont, 2005-05-08 08:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2005-05-08 09:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 09:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2005-05-09 09:57 pm UTC

[info]xero_sky
2005-05-07 11:15 pm UTC (link)
But in humility, I have attempted something transformative which we writers dare to call a miracle in the imperfect human idiom we possess.

*blinks*

WTF does that even mean?

Other than "OMG! Not only am I the bestest writer ever, but I'm expecting notice of my canonization any day now!"

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]iamtheenemy, 2005-05-08 08:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]crickets, 2005-05-09 12:56 am UTC

[info]livii
2005-05-07 11:21 pm UTC (link)
Beauty.

*falls down, is blessed*

(Reply to this)


[info]sorchar
2005-05-07 11:22 pm UTC (link)
Anne Rice claiming to have "humility" is like Gandhi claiming to have love handles. It just don't compute, man.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]charmian, 2005-05-07 11:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ravenclaw_devi, 2005-05-08 08:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]charmian, 2005-05-08 10:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jarofclay, 2005-05-07 11:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chaos_seahorse, 2005-05-08 12:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]moonjaguar, 2005-05-08 12:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]deerlike, 2005-05-08 01:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mariagoner, 2005-05-08 02:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]deerlike, 2005-05-08 02:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2005-05-09 09:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 09:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]uriel, 2005-05-16 03:33 pm UTC

[info]amasaglajax
2005-05-07 11:28 pm UTC (link)
I hope there's some sweet Jesus/Judas homoeroticism in the sequel!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]leto, 2005-05-08 01:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 09:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]deerlike, 2005-05-08 01:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladysphinx, 2005-05-08 04:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cool_water, 2005-05-09 09:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladysphinx, 2005-05-09 09:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cool_water, 2005-05-09 09:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]omega, 2005-05-08 05:48 pm UTC

tourette
2005-05-07 11:33 pm UTC (link)
I anticipate the reviews. I have never so much as read two words of an Anne Rice novel together, but she is smashing fun to laugh at. Is she still inserting homoeroticism into her novels, or has she abandoned that for the much more holy gratuitous violence? Homoeroticism would certainly give the Amazon reviews that extra frisson of rampant stupidity (it'll be a bit like the arguments about Doctor Who slash that have been flying about) but nobody can doubt that the mighty Rice ego is sure to piss off several dyed-in-the-wool Christians of all stripes. In fact, the general consensus that Anne Rice is mental could unite Catholics and Protestants alike. On this issue, anyway.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 10:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bakunina, 2005-05-09 12:07 am UTC

[info]sailorjpg
2005-05-07 11:34 pm UTC (link)
....

AHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!

*Falls out of chair*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drworm, 2005-05-10 07:00 pm UTC

[info]loopywafflehead
2005-05-07 11:45 pm UTC (link)
Jesus is laughing his head off at this right now. Anne Rice isn't going to go to hell, Jesus is going to keep her around as court jester or something.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

that deserves an icon. - [info]darkwitch666, 2005-05-08 07:43 am UTC
Re: that deserves an icon. - [info]crickets, 2005-05-08 08:40 am UTC
Re: that deserves an icon. - [info]darkwitch666, 2005-05-08 08:58 am UTC
Re: that deserves an icon. - [info]loopywafflehead, 2005-05-08 03:44 pm UTC

[info]sarajayechan
2005-05-07 11:58 pm UTC (link)
...Well, there goes Anne Rice's ticket to heaven.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]disgruntledjenn, 2005-05-08 01:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sarajayechan, 2005-05-08 06:44 pm UTC

[info]gaisce
2005-05-08 12:02 am UTC (link)
'Tis a miracle. Anne Rice single handedly makes a better mockery of Christian ideals than all the great satirists in the world have tried. It's like transtupidtization.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wankismyfandom, 2005-05-08 07:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]msmanna, 2005-05-08 12:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]palabradot, 2005-05-08 04:59 pm UTC

[info]cat_mcdougall
2005-05-08 12:06 am UTC (link)
First, she ruined vampires. Now, she's ruining Jesus. Is nothing sacred anymore?!

...

Wait. Anne Rice is writing Jesus Christ. Apparently not.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]linzee, 2005-05-08 02:53 am UTC
vamp!Jeebus - [info]dakotapratt, 2005-05-08 05:43 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]sesana, 2005-05-08 05:45 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]isa, 2005-05-08 10:57 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]stroppy_prof, 2005-05-09 03:28 pm UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]linzee, 2005-05-08 05:47 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]dakotapratt, 2005-05-08 05:50 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]xeno4eyes, 2005-05-10 02:21 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]linzee, 2005-05-10 02:24 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - (Anonymous), 2006-02-05 08:38 pm UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]luckdragonfujur, 2005-05-08 06:17 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]crickets, 2005-05-08 06:37 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]mercutia, 2005-05-11 10:49 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]crickets, 2005-05-11 03:59 pm UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]favyan, 2005-05-08 07:05 am UTC
Re: vamp!Jeebus - [info]chopperbetty, 2005-05-08 08:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 10:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]linzee, 2005-05-08 10:15 am UTC

[info]papervolcano
2005-05-08 12:13 am UTC (link)
This... This is just beautiful. I'm lost for words at the tidal wave of spooge, building up in front of us all. It's the gift that'll just keep on giving

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]aycelcus, 2005-05-08 01:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2005-05-08 07:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]papervolcano, 2005-05-08 09:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2005-05-08 09:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]etcetera_cat, 2005-05-09 02:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2005-05-09 07:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]etcetera_cat, 2005-05-09 04:38 pm UTC

[info]marumae
2005-05-08 12:13 am UTC (link)
I used to enjoy her work, but my main complaint was she used her characters as a soap box. But in later books when they started turning to shit when she grew a little too self important for her own good I wandered away, not really wanting to finish the series.

Crimney, I agree with what someone else said...this will not end well..

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]singe, 2005-05-08 04:24 am UTC

[info]tyraarane_
2005-05-08 12:22 am UTC (link)
...It's times like this that I wish we could go back to the old fire and brimstone God. Because I think she could do with a good smiting right about now. Maybe it'd deflate her massive ego.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]skat, 2005-05-09 12:14 am UTC

[info]moonjaguar
2005-05-08 12:25 am UTC (link)
Is Jesus a vampire?

Is Jesus from a clan of incestuous beings called Christos?

Will Jesus turn water into Charteuse? No, wait, that's Poppy Z. Brite. She's not as much fun, she hasn't bitched about fanfic hurting her lately even though she's written her share.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]tangentialone, 2005-05-08 03:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]willywanka, 2005-05-08 05:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2005-05-08 06:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nyoda, 2005-05-08 09:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]fandom_bitch, 2005-05-08 10:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]isa, 2005-05-08 10:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]absurdwords, 2005-05-08 04:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wisdomeagle, 2005-05-09 01:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]palabradot, 2005-05-08 05:17 pm UTC

[info]cheshireempress
2005-05-08 12:27 am UTC (link)
As entertaining as this book sounds, I think I'll wait for the sequel.

Y'know, the one where Jesus brings Lestat up to sit around Heaven with his and talk about how OMGmeeeeeeeen! people are for not "understanding" Anne's efforts to bring their words to the unenlightened masses.

(Reply to this)

Heh.
[info]lurker32
2005-05-08 12:27 am UTC (link)
Hey, Anne?

Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John called. Their lawyers want a word with you.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Heh. - [info]rosehiptea, 2005-05-08 12:30 am UTC
Re: Heh. - [info]etcetera_cat, 2005-05-08 01:58 am UTC
Re: Heh. - [info]squeakytoy, 2005-05-08 03:17 am UTC
Re: Heh. - [info]cool_water, 2005-05-09 09:05 pm UTC
Re: Heh. - [info]squeakytoy, 2005-05-10 12:39 am UTC
Re: Heh. - [info]kittikattie, 2005-05-08 05:24 am UTC
Re: Heh. - [info]nyoda, 2005-05-08 09:52 am UTC

[info]ladybirdsleeps
2005-05-08 12:37 am UTC (link)
in humility, I have attempted a miracle.

... I DON'T THINK IT WORKS THAT WAY, SPARKY. Sure, I cut out some of the wankage, but that was the gist.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sylvatica, 2005-05-08 01:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pet, 2005-05-08 04:03 am UTC
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