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Mistress Saigon ([info]mistresssaigon) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2003-06-13 18:31:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Right.

Apparently...

The Fellowship of the Rings Gets Braces

I'm not sure where to begin on how fucking stupid this is.

(Post a new comment)


[info]lokifin
2003-06-13 09:39 pm UTC (link)
*wipes blood from eyes*

I think...I think she read the VSDs or some MST3K of fanfic...it seems as though she's trying to be....funny?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re:
[info]mistresssaigon
2003-06-13 09:40 pm UTC (link)
I blame artificial colorings damaging her cerebral matter.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]bitpixy
2003-06-14 05:35 am UTC (link)
oh god...i saw all the HAs and stopped cold...ain't no way i'm losing my eyes over this one...

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]littlekitsch
2003-06-13 10:04 pm UTC (link)
I got as far as 'brace yourself' in the bloody author's notes.

I'm sorry, I just couldn't bring myself to carry on after that.

*is suitably ashamed*

Perhaps I should get absolutely piss-drunk and start again?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]chash
2003-06-13 10:20 pm UTC (link)
That's as far as I got too. And I feel it must be noted that everyone's inspiration is a weird place: the key is knowing when that inspiration is crap.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re:
[info]mistresssaigon
2003-06-13 11:38 pm UTC (link)
As your attorney I suggest consuming large quantities of hallucinogenics before attempting to read this entry. It will help shield your mind.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Perhaps I should get absolutely piss-drunk and start again?
[info]karmakaze
2003-06-13 11:42 pm UTC (link)
Why not, apparently you would not be alone there...

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]carolinecrane
2003-06-13 10:20 pm UTC (link)
I got as far as the 'author's' self-insertion conversation with Boromir. Then my eyes started bleeding and I was forced to stop reading.

(Reply to this)


[info]ulbandi
2003-06-13 10:26 pm UTC (link)
Ouch. I couldn't read past the first few lines.

Paragraphs are your friends.

(Reply to this)


[info]littleshebear
2003-06-13 10:38 pm UTC (link)
Dammit, I wish ff.net was working, then some indignantly wanky reviews might start coming in...this just isn't wanktastic enough yet.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re:
[info]mistresssaigon
2003-06-13 11:41 pm UTC (link)
no. we must wait and cultivate it's potential!!!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]miracalix
2003-06-13 11:47 pm UTC (link)
I only read the first sentence... so that was 75% of the 'story'.

Eesh.

Here, the very essence of elfhood has been captured:
"Legolas answered "yeah so what- I am immortal a year is like a second to me and after they are off I will be even cuter- BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA H--""

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re:
[info]mistresssaigon
2003-06-13 11:48 pm UTC (link)
maybe elves are allergic to nitrous oxide.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]chimara
2003-06-14 12:01 am UTC (link)
*snork*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]laurar
2003-06-14 01:26 am UTC (link)
"You only think I guessed wrong! That's what's so funny! I switched glasses while your back was turned - you've just fallen victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is this: never get involved in a land war in asia. But only slightly less well known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line. Aha ha ha ha ha ha ha! A ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! A ha ha ha... (plop)."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]iczer6
2003-06-14 01:52 am UTC (link)
"Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die."

"Have fun storming the castle boys!"

"Do you think they have a chance?"

"It would take a miracle!"


Icz

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]stepliana
2003-06-14 07:10 am UTC (link)
"no more rhymes now, i mean it!"

"anybody want a peanut?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]rowan
2003-06-14 07:20 am UTC (link)
Prrrrrrrrrrincess Buttercup!

My friends and I used to have this awesome Princess-Brice-in-Five-Minutes skit. It RULED.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]iczer6
2003-06-14 08:27 am UTC (link)
[While rolling down the hill]

AS... YOU... WISH!


Icz

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]arabel
2003-06-14 09:35 am UTC (link)
"Oh my sweet Westley!"

*throws self down hill after you*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]gelasius
2003-06-15 12:40 am UTC (link)
"Wankage. Wankage is wot bwings us togevah today. Wankage, dat bwessed awangement, dat dweam wiffin a dweam."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]arabel
2003-06-16 11:56 am UTC (link)
*best Humperdink voice*

"Fan and wank! Say Fan and WANK!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re:
[info]gelasius
2003-06-17 01:24 am UTC (link)
[best Wesley voice]

"Drop. Your. Wank."

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sagralisse
2003-06-14 12:08 am UTC (link)
It's sort of cute if you imagine the writer reading it really fast like in one long sentence and turning blue and then falling down and getting her braces stuck in the carpet.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re:
[info]mistresssaigon
2003-06-14 12:09 am UTC (link)
someone should track down her dentist and pay him extra for sado-service.

BYE BYE ANAESTHETIC!!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]aruru
2003-06-14 12:59 am UTC (link)
Amazing. I can't see all 7 of the reviews for some reason, but in the 4 that DID display... the reviews are even ENCOURAGING her to WRITE MORE. Someone even said "GOOD PLOT."

Damn, I'm starting to think that no amount of fuckups I would likely could do in attempting to write my fic ideas would be bad enough to compare to this!

(Reply to this)


dawnjosephine
2003-06-14 06:46 am UTC (link)
I hope to god she's writing for her "enjoyment", because it's not doing a damn thing for the rest of us (well, besides inducing nausea).
*curses the bleeding eyes for ruining her mascara*

(Reply to this)


[info]diamonde
2003-06-14 10:50 am UTC (link)
Badfic is not a wank unless the author gets bad reviews, stomps off in a huff, gets her imaginary big sister to tell everyone about her totally terminal illness, etc. If you just want to share the bad, I suggest badfic_support on LJ. If we put everything bad up here, we'd be at it all day and have no time for the tinhats and Smallville flamewars.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]snacky
2003-06-14 06:13 pm UTC (link)
OMG at your icon!

(and yeah, word on the not-wanky. I see badfic, but no wank.)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]miracalix
2003-06-15 01:14 am UTC (link)
Is there a badfic community on JF?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]snacky
2003-06-15 07:58 am UTC (link)
Not that I know of. I only know the one on LJ, the badfic support one.

Maybe it's time to start one? ;-)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

...
[info]miracalix
2003-06-15 10:35 am UTC (link)
Hmmm.... might be an idea. Not too sure of how to create communities on JF, but it can't be too different from Livejournal.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]hugsnkisses
2003-06-15 11:36 am UTC (link)
Well, there's [info]mst_eek, but that's just for MSTing. Not for your run-o-the-mill mocking.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

  
   
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