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Sofie Fatale ([info]sluggirl) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2005-06-28 16:19:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Zombie Wank
xclosedxhandx posts to zombie_survival with a rant five screens long saying essentially "LAND OF THE DEAD WAS AN INSULT TO ZOMBIES!" She complains about pretty much every aspect of the movie, from the concept of smart zombies to the "high-tech, missle eqiuped battle SU-FUCKING-V" called the Dead Reckoning. People disagree, or not.

Highlights:
As a film student, I have the ability to magically turn opinion into fact!

"You are not allowed to change the rules simply because you make good films though. You don't see Micheal Jordan doing that.
Shut the fuck up, you have no idea what you are talking about."

It's not huge as of yet, but xclosedxhandx is SO VERY ANGRY, and comments aren't slowing down.

EDIT: And she's back three hours later, with a new post featuring slightly more facetious anger (I think).
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(Post a new comment)


[info]shadowed_blade
2005-06-29 02:44 am UTC (link)
Wait, so he broke the rules that he made when he created the genre?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sluggirl, 2005-06-29 02:47 am UTC

[info]gal_montag
2005-06-29 02:49 am UTC (link)
Um. Zombies aren't real?

(Reply to this)

(Reply from suspended user)

[info]melloniel
2005-06-29 03:25 am UTC (link)
Somebody give me back the 10 minutes of my life I just wasted reading all that.

(Reply to this)


[info]esorlehcar
2005-06-29 03:49 am UTC (link)
I got as far as her claim that Dennis Hopper is playing the role he always plays, and decided that she's too stupid to live.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]apoplexia, 2005-06-30 12:01 am UTC

[info]b_list_celeb
2005-06-29 03:50 am UTC (link)
I saw LOTD a week or so ago, and already I've forgotten most of it. (Except that John Leguizamo was entertaining. But that's a given.)


I have taken enough film classes, and seen enough films to know that this was a choppy, sub-par, rushed, and edited film.

Someone please tell the whiny ass, overly pretentious twits who've taken Film 201 to stop making the rest of us look like fucktards? It really should be legal to shoot someone the minute they say "I'm a film student and..." to justify an argument.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]nevadafighter, 2005-06-29 05:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ninja_stripper, 2005-06-29 07:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nevadafighter, 2005-06-29 08:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nevadafighter, 2005-06-29 08:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mariagoner, 2005-06-29 08:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nevadafighter, 2005-06-29 10:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ninja_stripper, 2005-06-29 10:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ninja_stripper, 2005-06-29 10:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mariagoner, 2005-06-29 08:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ninja_stripper, 2005-06-29 10:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2005-06-29 02:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]apoplexia, 2005-06-29 02:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2005-06-29 02:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-06-29 06:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2005-06-29 07:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-06-29 08:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2005-06-30 02:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]made_by_kali, 2005-06-30 03:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2005-06-30 03:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]made_by_kali, 2005-06-30 04:19 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-06-30 06:46 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-06-30 06:44 am UTC

[info]littleshebear
2005-06-29 03:51 am UTC (link)
Bub. The trained zombie in Day of the Dead is called Bub, not Bud, Bub. Get it right, miss film-school-Romero-buff.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]feloniousfeline, 2005-06-29 06:11 am UTC

[info]xero_sky
2005-06-29 05:06 am UTC (link)
The movie was terrible, and the only people to like it are people who cannot think critically.

Well, at least she's upfront about being a pretentious twat.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]apoplexia, 2005-06-29 04:24 pm UTC

[info]mistressrenet
2005-06-29 05:29 am UTC (link)
Forget the wank: where did you get that icon?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2005-06-29 06:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]honorh, 2005-06-29 11:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2005-06-29 07:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2005-06-29 08:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mistressrenet, 2005-06-29 05:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sluggirl, 2005-06-29 08:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mistressrenet, 2005-06-29 08:59 pm UTC

[info]drworm
2005-06-29 05:59 am UTC (link)
Dude, isn't this the second time this community has been wanked? I never knew zombies were such serious business. :3 How naive was I!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2005-06-29 06:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]littleshebear, 2005-06-29 06:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pepperlandgirl4, 2005-06-29 06:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2005-06-29 07:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pepperlandgirl4, 2005-06-29 07:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]oxydosic, 2005-06-29 06:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]drworm, 2005-06-29 08:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sluggirl, 2005-06-29 08:15 pm UTC

[info]feloniousfeline
2005-06-29 06:09 am UTC (link)
Yes, but when you insult a zombie, do they know it?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]knightrider, 2005-06-29 11:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]feloniousfeline, 2005-06-29 09:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]knightrider, 2005-06-30 02:46 am UTC

[info]eclair
2005-06-29 06:16 am UTC (link)
Did no one else get a slightly disturbing image when reading the subject of this post?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]ruby_tuesday, 2005-06-29 06:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2005-06-29 09:36 am UTC

[info]moriath
2005-06-29 06:29 am UTC (link)
Well, *my* boyfriend is a certified zombie expert and owns the Zombie Survival Guide, which I've absorbed through osmosis, so I'm *clearly* more smarter than ALL of them.

And who the hell said the Savini gore was better than this? Talk about censoring, the blood was ORANGE in the original Dawn of the Dead. Talk about choppy, unrealistic gore.

As for zombies "not being us"...weren't they once? And as all of Romero's work is amazing social satire, it makes sense for them to occasionally show themselves as being similar to us (remember Bub? Hey, HE used a weapon!)

I felt that LotD was probably the weakest Romero movie, but I think my credentials totally own theirs :-P

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]moriath, 2005-06-29 09:48 am UTC
Tom Savini
(Anonymous)
2005-06-29 07:27 am UTC (link)
And here I was counting myself fortunate that I'm not interested in zombies but with the mention of LOTD, all I can picture is Tom Savini (the special effects/make up person)'s smirking face as he introduced himself to be the flawless, humble guy who made the zombie genre possible.

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2005-06-29 07:29 am UTC (link)
Wow, the amazing pretentiousness almost covers up the fact that this is a zombie survival community wank. My favorite part:

"Is it okay with you if someone likes the movie? Or is that morally inept? Would it be okay with you if someone genuinely enjoyed the movie?"
"No, it is not. The movie was terrible, and the only people to like it are people who cannot think critically."

Well thanks. I'll make sure that next time I want the opinion of the Zombie Film Goddess, I'll know who to talk to. *eyeroll*

<3, wifey

(Reply to this)


[info]goldberry
2005-06-29 08:50 am UTC (link)
I remember her from the last wank on this community. Wow. I don't know about the zombies, but she sure as hell isn't getting any smarter. *Headdesk*

(Reply to this)


[info]visp
2005-06-29 11:25 am UTC (link)
How do you insult a brainless, rotting, rabid corpse? Just wondering.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]smo, 2005-06-29 02:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]apoplexia, 2005-06-29 04:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2005-06-29 04:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kijikun, 2005-06-29 07:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]visp, 2005-06-29 09:58 pm UTC

[info]knightrider
2005-06-29 11:34 am UTC (link)
Oh. Nothing I loathe MORE than that classic internet hobag "argument", the good old - "YOUR OPINION IS WRONG". I pretty much left the Kill Bill boards on IMDB because of some drooling idiot who took that line, and the parallel one that "anyone who likes this is a fucking idiot," and when I put forward a largish essay on why I loved the film, I got a reply that went something like "oh, I get all *that*, but even so, WHY were you dumb enough to LIKE it?" I even find myself hating people who's opinions I agree with when they pull that shit.

*SIC HER*.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-06-30 12:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]out_bottle, 2005-06-30 05:42 am UTC

[info]aerobot
2005-06-29 12:52 pm UTC (link)
OMGWTFBBQSIZZLER HE BROKE HIS OWN RULES. THAT BASTARD.

(Reply to this)


[info]smo
2005-06-29 02:18 pm UTC (link)
The zombies would like everyone to know that they are picking up their brains and GOING HOME.

(Reply to this)


[info]apoplexia
2005-06-29 02:53 pm UTC (link)
Given the amount of time she spends slagging it off (tl;dr), 2.5 stars seems pretty generous.

(Reply to this)


[info]oxydosic
2005-06-29 06:36 pm UTC (link)
The movie was terrible, and the only people to like it are people who cannot think critically.

I don't WANT to think critically when i watch a horror movie! I'm just there to enjoy the screamy screamy gore gore! DON'T MAKE ME THINK WHILE I'M WATCHING HORROR DAMN YOU!!

(Reply to this)


dracothelizard
2005-06-29 07:27 pm UTC (link)
"You are not allowed to change the rules simply because you make good films though. You don't see Micheal Jordan doing that."

What the fuck does Micheal Jordan have to do with films?

And as for zombies, the proper legendary zombies are the ones made by voodoo masters to do their bidding. But I suppose defeating zombies by throwing salt on them or making them eat salt isn't as cool as shot-guns and explosions.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]evilsqueakers, 2005-06-29 07:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ninja_stripper, 2005-06-29 10:38 pm UTC

[info]waysmeanstonola
2005-06-29 11:25 pm UTC (link)
i'm just waiting for someone to make a zombie/celluar company joke in her second post. i'd make one, but i'm not coming up with anything decent. the best i've come up with is "at&t becomes zt&t".

also, bitch needs to lay off the capslock.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cat_mcdougall, 2005-06-30 05:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]waysmeanstonola, 2005-06-30 03:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cat_mcdougall, 2005-06-30 03:58 pm UTC

[info]kookaburra
2005-06-30 02:27 am UTC (link)
I did not read the wank, since I have no interest in zombies or movies depicting them, but I just wanted to say that if anyone ever has the urge to give me a "high-tech, missle eqiuped battle SU-FUCKING-V" I will most definitely not say no.

(Reply to this)
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