You know, I really did vow not to bring up anymore HP shipping wank. I feel for those who are getting bored/nauseated. So just don't click on the cut tag.

The people on Portkey were getting upset that they were being "quoted out of context" in this wank.

Redemption posts a long screed about... Ted Turner, among other things. Anndee Granger applauds and posts: Well Redemption is definitely going to be taken out of context...I dare them to post the whole thing.

ETA: NarcissaM...would you care to do the honors.

Well, I'm not going to post stuff on Fandom Wank just because I'm challenged, but this whole thing is just too funny in a crazy, paranoid sort of way. In fact it's one of the weirdest rants I've ever had the misfortune to read. It starts with the normal stuff that's been featured here for a few weeks. Then it cracks out the conspiracy theories. Here is Redemption's post. Everything below these ---- lines is from the forum. No commentary from me.

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Myth #1: Emerson is above those "irate, militant" shippers

Emerson: "I forgot how emotionally invested these 'shippers get. "Romance in the books is the most prominent source of debate in the online fandom, where many of the fans border on obsessive, but casual readers will never understand what the big deal is."

Mr. Mugglenet Emerson on his high horse shakes his head over the "obsessive" and "militant" H/H-shippers when he and Melissa, through their now infamous JKR-interview, have proven not only to be quite shipping-obsessive themselves but also proved to be the most militant shippers of them all. Emerson nuclear-bombed the H/Hr-shippers in front of an audience that H/Hr shippers never even remotely had.

Emerson says he can't understand what the big deal about shipping is, yet he and Melissa made the biggest deal out of it themselves:

How did you feel about the romance?

[Melissa puts her thumbs up and grins widely while…]

ES: We were hi-fiving the whole time

JKR: [laughs] Yes! Good. I'm so glad.

MA: We were running back and forth between rooms yelling at each other.

Again: They were running back and forth between rooms yelling at each other. Calling H/Hr-shippers obsessive but talking freely about freaking out over the romance in HBP like this.

ES: We thought it was clearer than ever that Harry and Ginny are an item and Ron and Hermione — although we think you made it painfully obvious in the first five books —

JKR: [points to herself and whispers] So do I!

ES: What was that?

JKR: [More loudly] Well so do I! So do I!

[All laugh; ]Melissa doubles over, hysterical, and may have died

Quite affected by the shipping, aren't we, Melissa and Emerson?

ES: Harry/Hermione shippers - delusional!

Kaboooom!, Emerson nuclear bombs H/Hr shippers and thereby proves to be the most militant shipper of them all.

[Much laughter in which Melissa emits a "Won-Won"]

Melissa goes nuts again.

JKR: Well I think anyone who is still shipping Harry/Hermione after this book -

ES: [whispered] Delusional!

Kabooooooom!

MA: I have to tell you, I'm looking forward to [this coming out], because, you know, a lot of this is predicated upon a necessary hate for another character. Ron has suffered horribly at the hands of Harry/Hermione shippers.

Melissa is milking the cow, accusing H/Hr shippers of Ron-hate when the H/g & Hr/r -shippers loathed the Hermione-character.

ES: Honestly, I think the Harry/Hermione shippers are a very small percentage of the population anyway.

The population! He's not talking about the fandom anymore but the whole populatiuon! Geez, Emerson, not every person is into HP and visits your site

ES: They seem more prominant online, but that’s just because the online fandom is very -

MA: Militant was the best word I heard -

The nuclear bombers based their dislike of the H/Hr shippers on hearsay. I've never seen them debating with any key-H/Hr-shipper, neither am I aware that they have ever chatted with a single one of them.

ES: Delusional!

[Laughter]

Kaboooooom!It's the doomsday machine!!

ES: And on MuggleNet, we say -

JKR: [Laughing] You say you're delusional lunatics?

MA: He basically says, “If you don't think this, just get off my site.”

[JKR cracks up]

ES: We say, “You're clearly delusional!”

Kabooooooom! Give the shipping-war-neutral pacifist Emerson the Peace-Nobel-Prize! :lol:

[quote]ES: Delusional, like I said. It’s my word of the day.

[Laughter]

Kaboooooom!Wooooo-wooooooo! Everyone into the bunkers!

A person like Emerson just has to be a Ron-fan. Identification is the key.
Emerson "heard" the word "militant" being connected to the H/Hr shippers. As a Ron-fan Emerson just had to accept this hearsay without prior verification of the facts. Not only proved Emerson to be the most militant shipper ever, he was also unaware that H/G & R/Hr shippers had flamed The "Plot thickens" -fanbook (TPT) at amazon.com, a quite militant act never matched by anything the H/Hr-camp had ever done. They gave TPT several 1-star reviews, telling lies about the book being outdated and aimed at "6 year-olds" (sic) and they specifically attacked my Snape-essay and the H/Hr essay of Hawk.

Myth #2: Emerson's nuclear bombing of the H/Hr was not unprofessional

Again: A person who avoids to take responsibility for his mistakes like Emerson just had to be a Ron-fan. Identification is the key. Moreover, when Emerson did the interview he handed over to JKR a fully signed copy of the "Plot thickens" fanbook: The fanbook had flushed money into the pockets of Emersons pals from Cos-forums, and it contained not only a H/Hr-shipping-essay but also my Snape- essay "Voldemort's pawns". This essay of mine received the only editor's note in the book from Galadriel Waters which praised "research, depth and presentation" as "exceptional".

So, according to Emerson, Galadriel Waters not only selected for TPT the essays of two delusional people who are supposedly unable to analyze the books correctly, she also openly praised one of these two essays.

Myth #3: "They're just books!"

No, they are not just words printed on paper, they are a significant influence to tens of millions of readers, most of them young people who are in the most important phase of building their personailty.

JKR smilingly writes Ron often enough as a hypocritical, envious, greedy, demeaning character wo is masking his unwillingness to take responsibilities with an "Everything's going to turn out alright, somehow!" -optimism.

A huge part of the readers only share the superficial and the bad attributes of the character Ron, but this is enough for them to identify with Ron. Ron evading the consequences of his failures and Ron "getting" Hermione is whitewashing the negative attributes of the character Ron; and it is subsequently whitewashing the negative attributes of the readers who are so similiar to Ron.
I've seen it for myself countless of times, most Ron-fans are entirely unable to admit when Ron is at fault. Just everything is done to shift the blame from their fictional identification figure.



Myth #4:
H/Hr-shippers hate JKR only because she didn't give them their ship

It goes a lot deeper than that. As I've explained above, negative attributes are whitewashed in an insanely popular books series. Also the Hermione character has been flushed down the toilet:

"Oh, don't start acting as though you understand Quidditch," snapped Ginny, "you'll only embarrass yourself."

With HBP JKR has managed to destroy everything good that book 1-5 had done to tens of millions of readers. That's right, kids! You don't have to read anything besides what a teacher or a government tells you to read! There's always going to be someone else like Hermione who does the reading for you and whom you can ask for information. JKR writes Harry and Ginny lash out on Hermione because Hermione does not consider Quidditch to be important.

How irresponsible is it to write this in a time and culture where people can tell you everything about the NFL or the latest celebrity-gossip but know lickety split about their own country's constitution.

Most people cannot find Iraq on a globe or have any idea how Patriot Act I and II turn the US into a police state but all those people still have their opinions about politics. :blink:
Also, JKR fueled prejudices against people who investigate political and economical conspiracies, scams and cover-ups. JKR created Luna and her father as stereotype tin-foil-hat-wearing conspiracy nutcases who run stories entirely based on rumors and laughable witness-accounts.

I am thankful for all the brave people who have risked their carreers and even their lives to investigate the truth. People who were slandered as nutcases for investigating issues that are now today totally admitted facts. Like Operation Northwoods for example, the pentagon-plans to conduct real and staged terror attacks against the US-population and blame the attacks on Cuba to have a pretext for invasion. Read it yourself: http://www.gwu.edu/~nsarchiv/news/20010430/northwoods.pdf

Or read how the US army blew up their own ship around 1900, the USS Maine, and blamed it on Spain as a pretext for war.
Check out the investigations of people like Alex Jones and judge for yourself:

http://www.prisonplanet.com

http://www.infowars.com

JKR sold the movie- and merchandise-rights of HP to AOLTimewarner, so everytime you and I paid money to see a HP-movie in cinemas and everytime someone bought HP-merchandise we have supported forced
abortions in China. Meh, now you ask yourself what the crazy tin-foil-hat conspiracy nutcases are talking about now.
This man: http://www.frostwald.de/turner.bmp

is Ted Turner, media super-mogul and vice-chairman of TimeWarner until 2003.
He gave 1 billion$ to the U.N. in order to support a global "de-population policy"

Turner’s gift, it turns out, is not as generous as described in media reports. An amount of up to $1 billion will be donated in the form of Time-Warner stock in ten annual installments. The cost to Turner could be significantly less than $1 billion if he takes advantage of tax write-offs, tax deductions and ways to avoid estate taxes. Amazingly, USA Today claims "Turner, or at least his heirs, could end up $100 million richer because he’s giving a billion away."

and

Turner has a long history of support for population control activities. Turner and wife Jane Fonda served as "Goodwill Ambassadors" for UNFPA. Fonda now leads a Georgia campaign against teen pregnancy, partly funded by a private condom maker.

According to Nicholas Eberstadt, a population expert with the American Enterprise Institute in Washington, D.C., Turner is on record in favor of a radical policy that Eberstadt calls "de-population." As recently as last month, the father of five children called for a worldwide one-child-per-family policy to reduce the world population. "We could do it in a very humane way, if everybody adopted a one-child policy for 100 years," Turner told participants at the annual meeting of the National Family Planning and Reproductive Health Association in Washington, D.C.

Once honored as "Humanist of the Year" by the American Humanist Association, Turner’s stridency on population control has earned him a reputation as an anti-Christian bigot. In remarks last October to the Society of Environmental Journalists, he complained that the Judeo-Christian tradition emphasizes "dominion over everything" and "increase and multiply." Turner once told a Dallas Morning News reporter that Christianity is "a religion for losers" and "I don’t want anybody [i.e., Jesus Christ] to die for me."

Wirth also is no stranger to population control efforts. In addition to his Planned Parenthood work in Colorado, Wirth led the State Depart-ment’s defense of a Clinton administration decision to deport several Chinese women who sought asylum in the U.S. to avoid forced abortion and sterilization in their native country.

At the urging of Rep. Chris Smith (R-NJ), chairman of the House Subcommittee on International Operations and Human Rights, Congress has cut off federal funds for UNFPA because the agency has been accused of compliance with the brutal Chinese population control program of one-child-per-family. Congressional hearings have disclosed that the Chinese government has forced many women to have abortions when they exceeded their one-child limit. Some women have testified that they were physically assaulted and forced to undergo abortions when they tried to carry a second child to term. In some cases, baby girls were allegedly abandoned or starved to death in government-run orphanages because of China’s cultural preference for male children.

http://www.apfn.org/apfn/turner.htm

So you see: There is more than enough reason to dislike JKR and the whole HP-industry. Emerson and Melissa are obviously part of this industry .

Redemption a.k.a. stic a.k.a. Alex

Some link

ETA - The poor mods at Portkey take down the insane conspiracy theories, for which I think they should get props, but it means that stuff's only available here.